Hi,i m Raaj from a brahmin family.my family planed to do upanayanam for me.my mother and sisters suggested that the ceremony be performed in a traditional way,involving head shaving and ear piercing and wearing of gimmiki earring.i am very afraid please help i am a boy 17 year.we are five sisters and i am the only one brother for them. i join the forum for yours help. my whole family want to upanayanam ceremony for me.i did not know what i do for this. because my parent does not allow me for hair cutting since my age of 8 year. now my hair is 3.8 foot long. my mother and my sisters care my long hair they put oil three day in a week.my sister apply different style at me. they want my hair grow more faster.when i was 9 year old my mom and my sister took me in jewelry shop and piercing my both ears.at this time i do not understood what the want.after this they buy for me a gold jhumka set.they put in my ears i feel pain but my mom said that it is nessasray for me. after that they buy for me girli dress like skirt,chudi etc.at my birth day my mom and my sister give me many set of bangles, angklets, earing jhumkas etc. one of my sister give me a complete saree.another one give me a gold nose ring my nose was not piercing at that time after two week a woman come to our home and she piercing my nose with hot needle.i feel pain.after this i look totally like a girl with all the jewelery and clothes also girly shoes even high hell sandals i wore. every day it is duty my sisters and mom to care me styling me.my hairs so long duo to struggle of my mom and sisters.if any one see me cannot belief me that i am a boy.they put makup on me like a girl.in wedding,birthday,holi ceremony i wore girls cloths,shoes,makeup,every kind of jewelry such as gimmiki, bangles,anklets, nose ring,etc.she then puts jui flowers/Gajra in my long hair with the help of pins.
they also put mendi on my hands and feet with different design.i did not know what they want?
But when i told my mom and sisters that why the do this they replies that it is better for me.i did not know what is better for me.when i told my mom how many times i look like a girl she smiled and replied minmam 25 years.we prepare for you for upanayanam.
Now i have some doubts:-

1-what sort of hairstyle will suit me.personally i like long hair styles some hairstyle that is very girlish.

2-What sort of earring should i wear? my mom told traditional gold jhumkas and gold nose ring like bride nose ring

3-for how much time should i wear earrings?

4-what sort of dress should(must be feminine) i wear?

5-i have thick eyebrows if i shape eyebrows will they grow even more thicker??

6-should i pierce my ears again in other part of the ears in the ceremony as my mom told that they piercing again double earing ??

7- which kind of shoes i wore?

8- which kind of wax i use?

plz help me.