Radha Soami Ji

I'm in a situation at the moment, which I need a little bit of help in. I've been in a relationship with my partner for the last 5 years whom i'm due to marry next year. He is a non believer of the path and is a meat eater. I on the other hand was born in a Radha Soami family, my parents have been initiated and got NAAM. So therefore I have been brought up as a vegetarian.

My parents feel very strongly about having no meat/alcohol at the wedding, however my partner and his family really wish to have it. I'm finding it very difficult as i'm stuck between the situation and trying to understand both ends. We are told as satsungi's not to eat meat, drink alcohol and not to provide this for someone if its not good for ourself. However the situation is the boys side would like to provide it, which we don't want either. As my parents feel being involved in this would upset our Guru and will also add a debt to our lives.

Has anyone been in this situation, or could shed some light to help me come out of this situation with a positive outcome.

Thanks in advance.

Marriage proposal between RSSB SATSANGI and some ordinary human being (whether vegetarian or non-vegetarian) is nothing but a bed of thorns and hence needs to be avoided.

These views are based on the survey done in respect of such marriages at large.

So it is recommended not to spoil life of some non-satsangi.

RSSB SATSANGIS should consider match within SATSANGI families only.

Here are some valuable lines of a poet to clarify the position.

SAFAR MEIN DHOOP TO HOGI, AGAR CHAL SAKO TO CHALO!
SABHI HEIN BHEED MEIN TUM BHI NIKAL SAKO TO CHALO !!
KISI KE WASTE RAAHEN KAHAN BADALTI HEIN !
TUM APNE AAP KO AGAR BADAL SAKO TO CHALO !!
YAHAN KISI FO RAASTA NAHIN DETA !
MUJHE GIRA KE, TUM SAMBHAL SAKO TO CHALO !!

Thank you for your message, unfortnately we can't choose who we fall for. But yes you're correct in stating it would be better to find a match in a satsangi family. Its a situation where its not easy to walk away from either.

Hello Pumpkinpatch,

One must not judge others decision or life. Did you know Baba-ji's wife was a non-satsangi? When you lead by example, others will follow, regardless if someone eats meat. drink etc, it should not make no difference at all.
Often people ask the similar question at Haynes Park and Baba-ji's response 'as long as you don't take part in the fest or drink, why should it matter, to each to its own'.
Your hubby to be and inlaws should have equal rights to particpate with the wedding plans.
Tell your parents not too worry and only be concerned with their own karmas.
People who say RS should marry RS have not understood the concept of this philosophy or they are narrow minded; which of course its not their fault, its the way they are.
Hope this helps.
Ash

Thanks for your response Ash, I agree with you completely. Its a difficult one as i'm trying to get my in laws to be have equal rights. But my parents are just so against the meat issue, that i don't know if we're being fair. Even though Baba Ji says 'as long as we don't take part in the feast or drink.' It would still be considered bad if someone else provided it?

A non sangati whether they are veg or non veg never can understand the value of rssb devotees but they claim that they have known everything.

Dear Pumpkinpatch,

yours is a dilemma faced by many satsangi families marrying their daughters to non-veg families.

From personal experience, I think you need to have an open and honest discussion with your partner and his family and put across your views and come up with a compromise that suits all.

For my sister's wedding, we agreed that the wedding day on the Saturday would be pure veg with no alcohol, and that the boy's side would only invite their close relatives.

But, the boy's side would have their own party on the day after the wedding, the Sunday, for which we, the girl's side, agreed to pay for the cost of the hall only, for the Sunday party. The boy's side did the actual Sunday party and organized all the (non-veg) food and alcohol themselves. Only close relatives from the girl's side (i.e. us Radha Soamis) attended the party on the Sunday for a couple of hours and were given veg food by our hosts.

This worked for us. It meant that we paid for 2 halls, one on Saturday and one on Sunday, but my parents preferred this rather than paying for meat and alcohol on the wedding day itself. Hope this helps.

See thats how the solution comes...rather than wt 0027 mentioned according to his believes.

SANSAAR SE BHAGE PHIRTE HO BHAGWAAN KO TUM KYA PAOGE!
IS LOK KO TO APNA NA SAKE US LOK KO KYA APNAOGE !!

YEH PAAP HAI KYA AUR PUNYA HAI KYA, REETON PAR DHARM KEE MOHREN HAIN !
YUG YUG MEIN BADLTE DHARMON KO KAISE ADARASH BANAOGE !!

YEH BHOG BHI IK TAPSYA HAI, TUM TYAG KE MAARE KYA JAANO !
APMAAN RACHYATA KAA HOGA, GAR RACHNA KO THUKRAOGE !!

HUM KAHTE HAIN YEH JAG APNE HAI, TUM KAHTE HO JHOOTA SAPNA HAI !
HUM JANAM BITA KE JAEN GE TUM JANAM GAVAN KE JAOGE !!

SANSAAR SE BHAGE PHIRTE HO, BHAGVAN KO TUM KYA PAOGE !!