Donald Love

• A lesson in business, my friend. If you have a unique commodity, the world and his wife will try to wrestle it from your grasp... even if they have little understanding as to its true value.

Dialogue

[Liberty City Survivor Commercial]

Male narrator: Tonight, the TV event that will make history: Liberty City Survivor! This takes reality TV to a whole new level! We'll take twenty recently paroled guys, equip them with grenade launchers and flamethrowers, and let them hunt each other down! It's the reality show where you just might be part of the action!

Man: I was grabbin' a sandwich at the Happy Blimp, and all of a sudden these two guys crashed through the window and started shooting at each other! I was so excited, I didn't even notice I'd been hit! After that I was hooked on Liberty City Survivor, I watch it every day in the hospital!

Narrator: The game doesn't end until there's one man left standing! Tune in nightly or watch the 24-hour live webcast! Liberty City Survivor: natural selection has come home. (Sponsored by Ammu-Nation)

Reed Tucker: Our ancestors didn't eat chicken wings. They lived at one with nature and their ecosystem, existing on a diet of nuts, berries and leafy vegetables.

Lazlow: Yes, and they threw stones at their own shadows and died of old age and fear at twenty-four.