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D.E.B.S. is a 2004 spy-film spoof about plaid-skirted schoolgirls who are groomed by a secret government agency to become the newest members of the elite national-defense group, D.E.B.S. (Discipline, Energy, Beauty, and Strength).
They're crime-fighting hotties with killer bodies. Taglines
- Written and directed by Angela Robinson.
Lucy Diamond
- Well, their poster child doesn't know it yet, but she's into me.
- I guess I'll see you around...'same bat time' or whatever.
Amy Bradshaw
- [to Janet] Remember when you got drunk and nearly got the chancellor of Bulgaria killed? I covered for you!
- [to Lucy] I'm here because I feel more like me when I'm with you, than I do when I'm with me.
- I think love should be irresistible, like a drug, you know? I think when it happens you should just not be able to help yourself. I just - I wanted... more.
Others
- Dominique: You're not as boring as I thought. But you're not as bright, either.
- Mr Phipps: You are a perfect liar.
- Scud: Knock 'em dead... but not really.
- Janet: Have you seen my gun?
- Ms. Petrie: This is not the Girl Scouts, this is espionage!
Dialogue
- Dominique: You need to put it here. Don't be an idiot for once.
- Janet: You need to speak French or English. Frenglish is not a language.
- Max: And what did I say to you the very first day of Academy?
- Amy: "That's my bunk, bitch."
- Max: Okay, after I said that.
- Scud: Just promise me you'll be open.
- Lucy: Open to what?
- Scud: Open to love.
- Lucy: [on an awkward blind date] So, you're an assassin.
- Ninotchka: Da.
- Lucy: How's that work?
- Ninotchka: It's mostly freelance.
- Lucy: [clutching stomach] I just, I'm feeling really ill. It's my stomach. I, um, I think I have food poisoning.
- Ninotchka: Are you blowing me?
- Lucy: What?
- Ninotchka: Off. Are you blowing me off?
- Amy: '[looking at Lucy through binoculars] Wow. Lucy Diamond, she's...
- Max: What?
- Amy: Real.
- Lucy: [after Amy refuses to go out with her] Why not?
- Amy: [still with her weapon trained on Lucy] Like a zillion reasons!
- [Lucy kicks the weapon pointed at her away, then snatches it away, and points it at Amy]
- Lucy: Now you have to come with me. [giggles]
- Janet: I have the sweater she's wearing, but in taupe.
- Amy: Really? Where did you get it?
- Janet: Target.
- Amy: No way.
- Dominique: Silence!
- Janet: [whispering] They also have it in teal.
- Lucy: [talking about a girl she met, Amy] Okay, first of all, you are gonna have to swear to me that you are not gonna freak out about this.
- Scud: Freak out about what? Why would I freak out?
- Lucy: Well, you know, sometimes you can--
- Scud: [freaking out] Oh, my God, who is it?
- Janet: [watching Amy and Lucy flirt] Correct me if I'm wrong, but your friend seems to be hitting on my friend.
- Scud: You're not wrong.
- Janet: Yeah, but my friend's not into that.
- Scud: [under breath] Right.
- Janet: [catching Amy and Lucy in a near kiss] Oh, my God! She almost kissed you! You almost let her!
- Scud: [smug] You owe me fifty bucks.
- Amy: Nothing happened.
- Janet: She was totally going to kiss you. You are so into her!
- Amy: I am not!
- Janet: You violated a prime directive. Plus, hello, it's a girl. You're so busted!
- Janet: They're calling you a hero, when really you're a slut!
- Amy: Shut up!
- Janet: [lowers voice] A gay slut!
- Amy: I'm not gay!
- Max: [to Amy] I don't care if you are the Perfect Score.
- Janet: [under her breath] Perfect whore!
- Max: I can't stop thinking about Lucy Diamond.
- Janet: [incredulous] You too?
- Lucy: Come with me. Come on, what do you have to lose?
- Amy: Everything.
- Lucy: I didn't even want to be a criminal. I wanted to be a pirate.
- Amy: [laughs] Pirates are criminals.
- Lucy: Oh. Whoops.
- [Amy fails to unhook Lucy's bra properly during their make-out session]
- Lucy: Did you just snap my bra?
- Amy: No.
- Lucy: Yeah, you did. That hasn't happened to me since sixth grade.
- Amy: I was trying to be smooth.
- Mrs. Petrie: Annie--
- Madeline: Amy.
- Mrs. Petrie: Amy, I think you identify with Lucy Diamond. I think she sees your pathos. You've got some dangerous union symbiosis going on. What's that movie with Jodie, and the little dog falls in the well, with the lotion?
- Madeline: "Silence of the Lambs".
- Mrs. Petrie: You're the lamb, Amy.
- Mrs. Petrie: Are you kidding me? We conduct a nationwide manhunt for you and you're boning the suspect? Did you think this was a joke? "Let's divert federal resources and man-hours so I can have my collegiate lesbian fling in style."
- Amy: I was doing research.
- Mrs. Petrie: I'll bet.
- Amy: Do you remember what I said to you the first time we met?
- Max: "High-proteins diets are overrated".
- Amy: After that.
- Lucy: Australia's toast.
- Scud: What's your beef with the Australians?
- Lucy: I don't like their attitude!
- Scud: So, I was wondering if maybe you wanted--
- Janet: Yes.
- Scud: I didn't ask you anything yet.
- Janet: Whatever it is, yes.
- Scud: Awesome.
- Scud: All right, then. We're going in.
- Lucy: What?
- Scud: We gots to get her back.
- Scud: D.E.B.S. en route, two minutes.
- Lucy: Do I look okay?
- Scud: [looks annoyed] This is retarded.
- Scud: What...the hell?
- Janet: I couldn't stop them!
- Scud: [pauses] You look nice.
- Janet: Thanks.
- [pauses]
- Janet: What?
- Max: [to Janet] What are you doing?
- Janet: [to Max] Nothing!
- [punches Scud, who falls to the floor, unconscious]
- Janet: Sorry!
- Max: [referring to Amy] If you break her heart, I will hunt you down and kill you.
- Lucy: [smiles] Deal.
- Janet: So, where're you going to?
- Amy: I think...Barcelona.
- Janet: I'll miss you.
- [pauses]
- Janet: Can I have your room?
Cast
- Sara Foster - Amy Bradshaw
- Jordana Brewster - Lucy Diamond
- Meagan Good - Max Brewer
- Devon Aoki - Dominique
- Jill Ritchie - Janet
- Jimmi Simpson - Scud
- Holland Taylor - Mrs. Petrie
- Michael Clarke Duncan - Mr. Phipps
- Jessica Cauffiel - Ninotchka Kaprova
- Christina Kirk - Madeleine