Sourced

• An OBE is what you get if you clean the toilets well at King's Cross station.
  • On turning down an OBE for his work in campaigning for the National Police Memorial http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/5024336.stm

• I don't want to do something for the sake of it. I am prepared to wait. If I wait until I am buried, too bad.
  • On regularly being asked to re-make Death Wish http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/5315068.stm

Unsourced

• Ah, that must be George Best's cremation.
  • When shown a picture of the Buncefield Oil Depot Fire whilst appearing as a guest on Have I Got News for You in December 2005, provoking laughter and outrage in equal measure

• Calm down dear, it's a commercial.
  • the catchphrase of his Esure adverts.

• God, the truth hurts!
  • When asked by a Daily Telegraph reporter how he would respond to Gordon Ramsay's comment that "Winner knows nothing about food."

• When I tell people I've slept with more than 130 women, they are appalled but, you know, I've been doing it for 55 years so I don't think that's bad going!

About Michael Winner

• He's the only person I've ever met who talks to me as I wish to be talked to.
  • Marlon Brando

• Winner knows nothing about food.
  • Gordon Ramsay