MythBusters Quotations

MythBusters is an American science television program on Discovery Channel starring Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman, two special-effects experts who set out to test the validity of timeless myths and urban legends of popular culture.

2003	2004	2005	2006	2007	2008
Exploding Toilet	Chicken Gun	Ming Dynasty Astronaut	Paper Crossbow	Hindenburg Mystery	James Bond Special 1
Cell Phone Destruction	Explosive Decompression	Brown Note	Shredded Plane	Underwater Car	Lead Balloon
Barrel of Bricks	Sinking Titanic	Salsa Escape	Archimedes Death Ray	Speed Cameras	Airplane on a Conveyor Belt
Penny Drop	Break Step Bridge	Exploding Port-a-Potty	Helium Football	Dog Myths	James Bond Special 2
Hammer Bridge Drop	Buried in Concrete	Is Yawning Contagious?	Franklin's Kite	Myths Redux	Viewer Special 2
Tree Cannon	Myths Revisited	Cooling a Six-Pack	Cell Phones on Planes	Voice Flame Extinguisher	MacGyver Special
Stinky Car, Raccoon Rocket	Scuba Diver, Car Capers	Son of a Gun	Bullets Fired Up	Birds in a Truck	Alaska Special
Escape From Alcatraz	Ancient Death Ray	Breaking Glass	Myths Reopened	Ninja Special	Shark Bites Extravaganza
	Elevator of Death	Jet Pack	Mind Control	Western Myths	Exploding Steak
	Beat the Radar Detector	Killer Brace Position	Exploding Pants	Big Rig Myths	NASA Moon Landing
	Killer Quicksand	Bulletproof Water	Crimes and Myth-demeanors 1	Grenades and Guts	Viral Hour
	Exploding Jawbreaker	Border Slingshot	Steam Cannon	Snow Special	Phonebook Friction
	Pingpong Rescue	Killer Tissue Box	Killer Whirlpool	Baseball Myths	Water Stun Gun
	Boom-Lift Catapult	Escape Slide Parachute	Diet Coke and Mentos	Viewers' Pick Special	Blind Driving
	Exploding House	MythBusters Revisited	Shattering Subwoofer	Red Flag to a Bull	Return of the Ninja
		Chinese Invasion Alarm	Crimes and Myth-demeanors 2	Superhero Special	Alcohol Myths
		Confederate Rocket	Earthquake Machine	Myth Evolution	Motorcycle Flip
		Vodka Myths	Deadly Straw	Trail Blazers	Coffin Punch
		Steel Toe-Cap Amputation	Killer Cable Snaps	Exploding Water Heater	End With a Bang
		Seasickness—Kill or Cure	Air Cylinder Rocket	Supersized Myths	Viewer Sequel Threequel
			More Myths Revisited	Shooting Fish In A Barrel
			Exploding Lighter	Pirates 2
			Concrete Glider	Confederate Steam Gun
			Firearms Folklore	Airplane Hour
			Anti-Gravity Device
			22,000 Foot Fall
Pilots		Specials		External links

Jet-Assisted Chevy, Pop Rocks and Soda

Jamie: These are actually more powerful than the JATOs—

Adam: But they're smaller; how's that possible?

Jamie: Well, we're gonna use more of them.

[The '67 Impala they just bought has broken down on an onramp.]

Adam: We are 8.5 miles from where we bought the car.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): It's 100 degrees, we're three hours from the shop, and—thanks to a blocked fuel filter—our rocket car is doing exactly…zero miles per hour. Thank goodness Adam's got the gold breakdown package.

[Adam's cellphone rings in the middle of his work.]

Adam: Who the hell could be calling me? I can't answer that, I'm tying a pig stomach into a skeleton.

Vacuum Toilet, Biscuit Bazooka, Leaping Lawyer

Jamie: [To Kari] That's probably the best shot that you'll ever see of your own butt.

Jamie: She'll have a huge hicky!

Adam: I've only ever broken one bone in my body—my neck.

Larry's Lawn-Chair Balloon, Goldfinger, Poppy-Seed Drug Test

[After they've inflated over 40 weather balloons for the test.]

Jamie: I think we've used up all the helium in the Bay Area.

[In the opening to the Goldfinger myth.]

Adam: Tub of body latex: $22 . Tub of gold pigment: $6. Watching your friend get naked, covered in gold paint and then jogging until he passes out: Priceless!

Ice Bullet

Jamie: What did you do today, honey?

Adam: [mimics a conversation] I made a Meat Bullet. Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

Cell Phone Destruction

Adam: We made something blow up! (claps his hands and laughs like an idiot)

Jamie: (to Adam) You're a nice guy and all, but sometimes you can be a bull in a china shop.

Adam: I'm not gonna respond to that. (They later busted that myth, actually)

[One of the MythBusters' experiments has just burst into flames with Adam nearby.]

Adam: [feels his face] I'm fine, I'm fine. I'm fine. Am I missing..an eyebrow?

Adam: So did you ever have customers come in and say "Could you sell me something different, this causes too much static shock when I wear it?"

Lingerie Store Owner: No, but they've said "This causes too much shock!".

Adam: You think we can build some pantie friction in the bed here?

Jamie: Well, that's what it's for, isn't it?

Jamie: Jamie wants big boom.

Adam: Coming up on MythBusters: can we make gasoline blow up?

[The MythBusters, despite repeated attempts to ignite gas fumes inside their large test box, are unable to do so.]

Adam: [exasperated] Ah...how hard can it be to blow up a room full of gasoline?

CD-ROM Shattering

[After a lengthy session of shattering CDs, Adam and Jamie examine the shards embedded in a ballistic gelatin torso placed near the test rig.]

Jamie: Any day we create that much shrapnel is a good day.

Barrel of Bricks

Adam: God damn barrel! It didn't do squat!(Adam examines the barrel) What is this? (Pause) This barrel is too damn strong!

[After Buster is broken in the course of the test.]

Adam: We broke a crash test dummy, man! I think that's a red letter day!

Peeing on the Third Rail

[Adam works on a skeleton to use for a test dummy.]

Adam: I'll always miss my old skeleton. It's too bad. He got his head blown off…with a Mannlicher-Carcano rifle.

Adam: It just goes to show, do not grab the third rail with both hands and *bleep* on it from 3 inches away! [kneels down on the rail, mimicking a drunk person] Oh man, wait a second, I gotta take a wee. Woo! That'll never make it on the show. [Which is ironic because it did make it on the show.]

[The test dummy's legs (which Adam was supposed to glue, but he used tape instead) start leaking gel.]

Adam: It's leaking from…everywhere.

Jamie: We didn't glue that at all, huh?

Adam: No, I didn't.

Adam: Total crapola. This is a complete and utter disaster.

[Adam starts fooling around with the cellophane tape.]

Jamie: Oh, stop playing and let's do this.

Adam: [about the cellophane] That's such a good sound!

Deadly Microwaves

Adam: I wouldn't say Jamie's an evil genius…I'm not sure he's evil, and I'm not sure he's a genius.

Jamie: This is right up there with one of the weirder things that we've had to do; trying to put a dead chicken in a tanning booth? Umm, hello?!

(Concerning the results of Jamie's "super-microwave", which has apparently done exactly the opposite of what it was intended to do)

Adam: You've made a refrigerator!

Penny Drop

Jamie: I always enjoy seeing Adam in pain.

[The MythBusters' modified nail gun fires prematurely, breaking a fluorescent light.]

Jamie: Uh, whoops! [giggles] We should get outta here, that's mercury vapor there.

Adam: Go ahead, shoot me in the ass. C'mon, I can take it!

Buried Alive

[Adam describes what will happen to Jamie, who will be buried alive inside a coffin.]

Adam: So, the next step is to load this up on our forklift, lower it down into our makeshift above-ground grave, fill it with earth, and monitor Jamie until he…begs for mercy.

[Jamie is about to be buried]

Jamie: Farewell, cruel world!

Adam: [laughs] Bye-bye, Heinieman.

Cola Myths

[Jamie is polishing a chrome car bumper with cola and aluminum foil]

Jamie: I'm not sure exactly what the aluminum foil does with this.

Adam: [in his "super geek" voice] Well, I think it, uh, ionizes the cola particles and, uh, brings the rust to the surface!

Jamie: That's aluminum foil.

Adam: What did I say?

Jamie: You said tinfoil.

Adam: Whatever; keep scrubbing, Cinderella!

Adam: Cola's goin' down!

Lightning Strikes Tongue Piercing

[After Adam goes through troubles making the first vacuform mold of a head.]

Adam: All right. Let's go do another nine.

[During the course of the experiment, Adam placed a particularly large "piercing" into a ballistics gel head. Back at the table, later:]

Adam: We did get a strike right to the doorknob, but, c'mon, who wears a doorknob?

Tree Cannon

Jamie: I'm making a cannonball out of granite…or a mess.

Adam: Remember, children, MythBusters has hired a licensed pyrotechnician to help us blow stuff up. You should never try anything like this unless you have your own television show.

Adam: (Adam is using a chainsaw) I'm not doing anything that the Pakish wouldn't have done if they had had a chainsaw.

Beat the Breath Test

Jamie: Adam, the police officer said you need to drink more.

Adam: You know, my Doctor was also telling me that I'm not getting enough tar…so, I need to start smoking again!

Adam: I'm lit. It's like one in the afternoon, and I'm lit.

Adam: So we've had 13 drinks over 3 hours. I know I'm drunk, but I can't even remotely tell that you're drunk. It's kind of annoying. I want to see you put a lampshade on your head or something.

Jamie: Sorry, bub!

Adam: Your best bet is to probably hold your nose, literally, and just take a big bite outta this onion.

Police Officer: [to Adam] He's doing fine. You just sit over there and be quiet. It's rough enough to have one of you here. But having two...

Adam: [laughing] Of course I'm causing trouble.

Raccoon Rocket

Adam: But there's always two parts to a MythBusters story: there's replicating the myth, and then there's duplicating the result.

Duck Quack

[Adam and Jamie are checking out ducklings.]

Jamie: Adam, don't let their looks deceive you, these are actually quite deadly.

Roger Schwenkee: We need to attach [a tie-clip microphone] to the duck.

Jamie: Duck Tape.

[Jamie is trying to get a duck to quack.]

Jamie: Don't mess with me, duck.

Jamie: Don't give me any beak.

[Jamie is trying to silently make a duck quack]:

Adam: It's like he's trying to collect a loan from the duck. Duck loan collection agency! [in stereotypical mobster voice] I wanna talk to you about some outstanding feed.

Jamie: Quack, damn you!

[Having busted the myth, Adam and Jamie are about to release the ducks into the bay. One of the ducks quacks loudly.]

Adam: Where were all those quacks when we needed them?

Killer Washing Machine

Adam: How many of you have ever seen a washing machine... naked?

Adam: What's that? That can't be that necessary, I don't recognize it!

Adam: Basically now I'm about to pour the dog wee on the pile of baking soda, which, if the myth is correct, should cause a small explosion, or, if we're actually on Earth, will do absolutely bupkis.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Some of last season's fashions are packed around his legs.

Adam: (in a strange accent) I told you no colors with the whites!

Adam: Get me the Jack Russell terrier urine! That oughta do it! They're hyper little creatures.

Explosive Decompression

Rob Lee (US Narrator): You know a rock band has made it when they get their own private jet. The MythBusters know they've made it when they get to destroy their own private jet.

Rear Axle

Jamie: Since he's already dirty, he's been kind enough to...spare me.

Adam: That's how his shirt stays white. I do all the dirty work!

Adam: I reject your reality, and substitute my own!

Adam: An empty car doing doughnuts and a police car with its lights flashing…Nah, I checked. There's nothing more fun than that.

Jamie: When will the fun ever stop?

Goldfish Memory

[Adam and Jamie buy goldfish and supplies for the test from Steve, a pet shop owner.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): It's the easiest sale Steve's ever made: two tanks, ten fish, and enough supplies to feed a whale.

[The beginning of the competetion, to Adam.]

Jamie: I'm gonna kick your goldfish ass.

(Jamie's goldfish has just finished the maze in twenty-five seconds.)

Adam: Mine are eating their own poo.

(Adam taps on Jamie's goldfish tank and says: "Goodnight fish")

Jamie, talking to the camera: You see, this is what has basically screwed him up, like, "Good night fish" (Imitating Adam), Yeah! that would help!

Adam: We have to identify the smart ones.

Trombone Explosion

Jamie: Hi, we're here to buy a trombone.

Clerk: Sure, for a student?

Adam: Well no, actually we want to blow it up.

Clerk: You want to blow it up? [pauses] We have some used ones.

[Pyrotechnician Jack Morocco is loading an explosive-filled mute into a trombone.]

Jack: So how much is in there?

Jamie: It goes all the way to the tip. That's six rocket engines.

Jack: Got a regular Panzerfaust here.

Jack: Boy, I sure hope we don't fly beyond our limits here.

Jack: Just another day of blowin' somethin' up.

[Adam blows the demolished trombone.]

Adam: Hey, it still makes noise!

Adam: [trying to make Buster stand in front of the trombone] It's like trying to make a dead man stand.

Rufus Hound (BBC Narrator): Better not ask why Adam knows that.

Break Step Bridge

[During the initial test, where Jamie's soldiers aren't getting enough air power]

Adam: Jamie's made a doo-wop group, not a battalion of soldiers. Looks like the California Raisins.

Adam: They're cute…cute for SCIENCE.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Ah, the old Mythbusters motto: when in doubt, add something heavy.

[Adam tips the bridge over, destroying it.]

Jamie: Feel better now?

Adam: I do feel better.

Jamie: Good for you.

Toothbrush Surprise

Jamie: There's poo everywhere!

[Adam talking with a Toothbrush in his mouth.]

Adam: We're using the ones that were on top of the toilet.

The Hunt for Hoffa

[Adam is digging a hole in front of the workshop to bury pigs for a test.]

Jamie: Adam doesn't know it yet, but he's digging his own grave.

Adam: What's that?

Jamie: What? Nothing.

Jet Taxi

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Who'da thought? Cheap car, dud battery.

Jamie: It seems like you have to take the car tire off in order to change the battery. What is the point? Probably because someone built the damn thing in a computer and doesn't have any sense. Piece of crap.

Rob Lee: While Jamie curses all things modern…

[Jamie rigs the taxi to be operated remotely.]

Adam: I think Jamie and I should drive around and pick people up.

Jamie: Yeah, with nobody in the front seat.

Myths Revisited

[Jamie is wearing a thermal suit while they're testing a myth on exploding aerosols. He hasn't spoken since he put on the suit.]

Adam: You wanna take your hood off and participate in this conversation?

Jamie: I kinda like it in here. It's private.

[Playing with Buster's face]

Adam: You guys have f***ed with me long enough. It's payback time and payback's a b****.

(Adam's cursing is censored with rifle gunshot sounds, and Grant is heard laughing in the background)

[Talking to Tory after taking off Buster's face that he had on]

Adam: You know what's funny is that when you put this on you can smell, and you get all these scents and memories of blowing him up, dropping him off a cliff, a little salt water, a little rotting pig.... It's like a... It's like a trip down memory lane. You wanna try?

Tory: No thanks.

Adam: Not only do we get to short out a battery, but we get to do it in a gasoline-rich environment! I can't think of a better way to spend a Monday afternoon.

What Is Bulletproof?

Adam: [referring to the safety glass the team uses] You told us all it was bulletproof, and, it's not!

Jamie: [Adam, after several tries, has finally hit the target] Good shot, Adam.

Adam: Thank you, Uncle Jamie.

Skunked!

[Adam and Jamie release a skunk into the women's room in an attempt to incite it to spray them.]

Christine: Thanks for putting it in the women's bathroom.

[Adam is pouring beer onto the floor to try and get rid of skunk smell]

Jamie: What...you're doing it all wrong! It's spilling everywhere. You gotta start at the top and move down.

Adam: It's hard being Jamie sometimes.

Adam: Finally! We smell foul!

Ancient Death Ray

Adam: I can't help but notice that IT'S NOT ON FIRE YET!

Jamie: Our death ray doesn't seem to be working right. I'm standing right in it, and I'm not dead yet.

[After Busting the myth, Adam has the "death ray" flop to the concrete face-first, breaking every mirror in the array.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Well, that's about 2,000 years bad luck right there.

Levitation Machine

Adam: This is the show. It's like four minutes of science and then ten minutes of me hurting myself.

Adam: COME OOOOON!!!

Rob Lee (U.S. Narrator): It's a very un-MythBusters-like moment. They've built an invention, and nothing has gone wrong… [Adam falls onto his back from a standing position as the machine is turned off.] Ahh, that's more like it.

Elevator of Death

Kari: Since we're here anyway, can we film a horror movie?

[Jamie and Kari are measuring the height of the elevator shaft.]

Jamie: 92 feet, to the top of the pulleys.

Kari: Uh, 92 feet to the dead bird.

[The crew cleans debris from the elevator car.]

Scottie: [Holds up a dead bird.] Two words—Naaas-ty.

[Adam is disabling the elevator's safety brake for the experiment.]

Adam: Anticlimactically enough, I believe I've disabled the entire mechanism by removing this simple pin.

[After Buster falls down the elevator.]

Adam: I believe this is more damage than we've ever done to Buster in one myth before.

Beat the Radar Detector

Scottie: We'll never get pulled over for going six miles an hour!

Rob Lee: Overseeing this myth are the good men of the California Highway Patrol. Because if there is a way to cheat the radar gun, they wanna know about it.

[Kari just fired off the fire-extinguisher chaff gun.]

Tory: [to police officer] So, which would be more expensive, the speeding ticket or the littering ticket?

CHP Officer: [laughs] The littering ticket.

Tory: So here's my favorite—And I think you'll like this one, Adam…the Radar Wheel of Death!

Adam: [laughs] Oh my god!

Plywood Builder

[Adam makes a miscalculation judging the necessary weight for a ten-inch-tall miniature Buster doll.]

Adam: I just did the math. I need him to weigh 25 pounds.

Jamie: So you're saying that he needs to be built out of depleted uranium.

Adam: [Laughs.] Do you have some? Is it under "D" or "U" over here?

[Adam breaks a sheet of wood veneer.]

Adam: One tore, bringing it out...trying to get it out of the way of Jay the cameraman!

[Buster is dropped 60 feet to the ground. He lands with a solid THUNK.]

Christine: [Laughs out loud.] I was laying on the ground when he hit, and I felt the ground move a little bit.

Adam: I never get tired of doing that.

Christine: He's gonna die…but it's gonna look great.

[Adam's Plywood Parachute is about to be tested.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): These rigs represent three days of skill, passion, and effort. Pity, really.

[The parachute fails miserably.]

Adam: Well, a fat lot of good that did.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): And that's why they don't make parachutes out of wood.

Adam: [to Jamie] I'm taking solace in the fact that your wing is going to fail so utterly spectacularly.

Jamie: You're probably right. But then you never know.

Adam: [nods] But then you never know.

[Jamie's design falls to the ground, hitting the surface on its side and snapping into pieces. Buster thuds to the ground loudly as Adam begins laughing hysterically.]

Adam: [laughs out loud] Whoo!

Christine: Do you feel better now?

Adam: I do, I feel a lot better.

Rob Lee: In his quest to build the ultimate plywood parachute, Adam Savage screws up.

Adam: [after ruining a part of plywood] Oh, *beep*!

Jamie: We're trying to up the bar on this stupid stuff we're doing.

Bathtub Electrocution

[Christine is hauling in a toilet to use in their bathroom set.]

Christine: Rented it for $10…and it's dripping on me. God knows what's in this water.

[Adam is working on creating a full-size dummy out of ballistics gel.]

Adam: Let's get on our knees and pray. I don't know to whom. Is there a patron saint of ballistics gel?

Adam: Next up, we have the iron, or as we like to call it, "Fierro de los Muertos!"

Adam: If Jamie doesn't believe it'll work, then I have no trouble dropping the toaster in the bathtub when he's sitting in it. But something tells me he won't.

[The MythBusters have just dropped a hair dryer with a ground fault interruptor (GFI) switch into the bathtub. The GFI switch has failed to trip.]

Adam: What kind of ground fault interruption is this? It's pumping water! I would say that's bad!

[Electricians are assessing why the test bathroom has electrical problems.]

Rob Lee: It turns out there are two faults in the system: Adam and Jamie.

[Adam drops a toaster into the test tub. The flash pot goes off, indicating a fatal shock.]

Adam: Woah.

Rob Lee: Our friend here is...toast.

Adam: Oh yeah: 12 milliamps. Toasters—no good.

[After Adam drops the toaster into the bathtub and picks up the curling iron.]

Adam: Now it's time for one of my personal favorites, [imitating Pee Wee Herman and making the curling iron look like it's talking] the curling iron! Let's go!

Jamie: What are you? Pee Wee Herman?

Killer Quicksand

Adam: Killer quicksand. Is that why I'm standing here in this stupid pith helmet?

Jamie: No, you're standing there in that stupid pith helmet because you're an idiot.

Jamie: Adam needs a cookie.

Jamie: [pushing Adam into the quicksand] Drown, you bastard!

Exploding Jawbreaker

Rob Lee (US Narrator): (After a microwaved jawbreaker was put in the metal teeth which caused it to explode, injuring Tory) So, the MythBusters have conclusively proved that jawbreaker plus microwave plus steel teeth equals scalded MythTern.

Pingpong Rescue

Adam: In Monterey Bay, Ping-Pong ball plus sea otter equals jail time for at least some member of the crew, I think we'll have to draw straws to figure out who.

Boom-Lift Catapult

[Tory tries a second test of the boom-lift.]

Tory: All right, I'm gonna count down…49, 48…just kidding. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

[The test fails.]

Tory: And, Buster didn't even spill his coffee.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Doing things "the MythBusters way" usually spells trouble…on a titanic scale.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): It's audacious. It's ludicrous. It's…MythBusters.

Adam: I think it's about a 10% chance of the whole thing falling down, about a 40% chance of Buster actually flying any distance, and the other 50% is Buster going "FOOM!" right in front of the thing.

Tory: [commenting on the amount of destruction] Hey Adam, would you say it's safe to say that there won't be a second shot?

Kari: Myth totally failed. Completely busted. Totally, completely busted.

Scottie: And Buster: busted. And boomlift: busted.

Jamie: And everything's busted.

Adam: Ground:

Scottie: busted.

Jamie: MythBusters.

Adam: Breaking big things for science, every day.

[One of the crew members' phone rings]

Needle in a Haystack

Jamie: NASA can put a man on the moon.

Adam: But can the MythBusters find a needle in a haystack?

Jamie: That means the first stop is a hay store.

Adam: Uh, otherwise known as a farm.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Ah, the hay store.

Adam: Its funny, because if you asked me to pick out what you would think of as your traditional, y'know, "movie-type" hay, I would point to the straw.

Jamie: Traditional "movie hay?"

Adam: Yeah, y'know, like the people are always getting stuck in a hay bale or rolling in the hay, or whatever they do in the movies? Thats what I would think of as hay.

Jamie: Having a roll in the hay with your girlfriend?

Adam: Yeah... don't get all red-faced.

Kari: Do you see his [Jamie's] machine working? It's like Dante's Inferno over there!

Adam: I can see the cut now, "Hey! We'll be drinking mimosas in an hour or two."...

Adam: [in a flashback clip] We'll be, like, sipping mimosas on the beach...

Adam: ...Cut to, "6 hours later, Adam's team is still going at it."

Rob Lee (US Narrator): 6 hours later, Adam's team is still going at it.

Adam: "They've found two needles..."

Rob Lee (US Narrator): They've found two needles...

Adam: "But still have the smallest needle and the bone needle to go."

Rob Lee (US Narrator): But still have the smallest needle and the bone needle to go.

Adam: This is adding some magnets to the front end of our feed trough. These are super strong neodymium magnets. And see if we can't pick the needle out at the very beginning.

Scottie: You just had your finger on it!

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Good idea, Jamie thought of it ages ago.

Exploding House

Adam: All right, so I think my faulty wiring of the faulty wiring is no longer faulty, so that it's correctly faulty.

Jamie: Yet again we're blowing things up in front of my shop. And not only that but there are noxious chemicals involved which will probably leave a residue over the whole block and, um…I guess it's okay. I'm getting used to it. So are the neighbors.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Time to take stock. Model house—check. Potentially explosive bug bomb—check. Various open flames and electrical sparks—check. What could possibly go wrong?

Adam: Big boom, big boom, big boom!

Adam: Here on MythBusters Makeover, we're turning this lovely California bungalow into a disaster zone.

[After they succeed in blowing up the gas from the bug bombs.]

Adam: That's what I wanted to hear!

Talking to Plants

Jamie: Putting all of these greenhouses up on the roof, I think I'm gonna get checked out by the police for growing pot or something up here, y'know. It's like "What are you doing?" It looks kinda suspicious.

Tory: Do you have hardcore, to-the-bone death metal?

Music Store Clerk: Do we ever!

Kari: I just think the talking plants are committing suicide because they're listening to (In a very high-pitched voice)"I loveyouloveyouloveyou" all freaking day!

Kari: [From the recording] If you were in college, you'd be a freshman!

Adam: You called the plant a freshman?

Kari: I was running out of material!

Scottie: [to a pea plant] I hope your roots rot in hell. The only thing you're good for is giving people gas.

Kari: [to another pea plant] YOU SUCK FRESHMAN [censored]! [to a crew member] How's that?

Scottie: Beautiful round green peas...

Kari: You nasty little awful green pea that's ruined every single burrito I've ever had.

Kari: [Talking while miming a mitten puppet.] The plants are doing very well today, Tory!

Scottie: [In the same puppet voice.] Hi Tory, what plants do you think are doin' better?

Tory: Hey, you guys... [Leading them to the door in a concerned way]

Scottie: Well I think the heavy metal plants are better! Because there's so much anger in this world it really helps to listen to that kinda stuff so we can get it all out.

Tory: Its okay, shhhh.

Scottie: [Answering herself] Oh! I can see what you mean! That classical music really kinda makes the hairs on my neck stand up!

Tory: Lets get out of the sun.

Kari: Dumbass peas.

Adam: Me and Tory are going to try one of the Death Metal peas.

Ming Dynasty Astronaut

[On experimenting with different mixtures of gunpowder.]

Adam: In this line of questioning, the only way to know without... being educated is to just keep on trying different formulations. And at a certain point we have to stop and just, you know, blow [censored] up.

[Adam has failed at several attempts to create effective rockets.]

Adam: I think we need to get professional help…then maybe find some rocket experts.

[Adam joins Jamie as he's making new rocket fuel.]

Adam: You makin' pudding?

Adam: 80 lbs. of gunpowder, 22 idiots, 1 crash-test dummy…priceless.

[Just after the first rocket chair launch.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Just like Xuan Hu, Buster's vanished, but he's no astronaut. In fact...he's toast.

Adam: His a** is on fire!

Adam: And here I thought the Elevator of Death was the most damage he's ever withstood. He is burnt to a crisp!

Adam: [in a Chinese accent] I going to teach you a lesson.

Free Energy

Jamie: Kind of makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, don't it?

Adam: If you mean it makes me feel like I feel about the Easter Bunny or Santa Claus, yeah, that kind of warm and fuzzy, 'cause it's a FANTASY!

Jamie: I'm not sure what it's gonna do, but it looks cool.

Adam: Nonetheless, we were able to do it with a reasonable number of tests, and I'd say it's busted, busted, busted! And I don't wanna get an e-mail about it!

[Adam recoils as a device breaks.]

Adam: That might have been, I dunno, a bad noise. I'm releasing the mysterious blue smoke here. The problem is once you release the mysterious blue smoke, electronics don't work anymore.

Killer Ceiling Fan

[The MythBusters are about to subject a ballistics gel bust of Adam to a custom-made razor-sharp ceiling fan.]

Adam: As long as you're going to do it with me, let's make sure everyone knows who it is.

[Adam then puts his glasses onto the bust.]

Adam: You'll have to tell me how it turns out 'cause I can't see a damned thing.

Kari: [Points to the bust.] Judging by the Coke bottles on this thing, he can't see a thing either

Kari: It's like a little tornado down here!

Adam: Absolutely, and so probably some human cranium, we've done this before when we did Penny Drop..

Scottie: Human cranium? We have human cranium?

Adam: I have the human cranium in storage, yep.

Scottie: You would.

Adam: We have one of everything here at MythBusters.

Cement Removal

[After detonating a cherry bomb in a cement truck.]

Adam: It sounded like we just planted a midget with a paper bag.

[The team have just destroyed a cement truck with over 800 pounds of high explosives.]

Adam: Jamie, I swear I left it right here!

Jamie: This has got nothing to do with the myth; it's just a big boom.

Jamie: Talk about removing concrete, there is no concrete, there is no truck, there's no nothing.

Kari: Failure is always an option on Mythbusters.

[Adam holds up what appears to be one of the cement truck's engine parts.]

Adam: Well, there's your problem!

Salsa Escape

Christine: Don't shoot me with that pellet gun.

Adam: I'm not gonna shoot anyone with the pellet gun…[imitating southern accent] Not unless I have to!

Jamie: Did I ever tell you that I worked as a concrete inspector for several months up in Seattle?

Adam: Was this before or after you were the big animal veterinarian for the circus?

Jamie: No, I never did that. You must be mistaken.

Jamie: Think, then act. Don't act, then think.

Christine: [Looking at level on top of homemade concrete prison] Oh my God, it's level! [level falls over] awwwww...

Jamie: Time for us to pit our skills against each other.

Adam: You have an unfair advantage because you've broken out of a Mexican prison before.

[Adam notices that Jamie is using a radio part on his salsa.]

Adam: What is that?

Jamie: This is a radio.

Adam: How'd you get a bloody radio?

Jamie: I was good.

[After spending hours trying to dissolve the window bar]

Adam: If anything, my bar is bigger! I'm increasing the mass of the bar!!

[Jamie watches Adam burning salsa.]

Jamie: He's practicing for his experience with the electric chair.

[Adam burns his hand with salsa.]

Adam: Ow! [cries in pain] ow, hot, burning, salsa napalm!

[Jamie watches Adam scrape burnt salsa off his bars.]

Adam: God, this stuff smells rank.

Jamie: It looks kinda like…poo.

[Adam handles a silk shirt soaked in urine.]

Adam: Eew, it's warm! I didn't want it to be warm. There's wee everywhere.

Driveshaft Pole Vault

Jamie: It's our mission to destroy the car, no matter what.

Jamie: This is pure dumb luck, if it works, that's why I wanted Adam on it.

Kari: [to Adam] Anytime you show up I'm scared.

Kari: [to Adam] Your way of working is one of the great mysteries of our time.

Kari: This is MythBusters, of course I'm expecting problems.

Scottie: [about Tory] Let's egg him on until he hurts himself. That's always fun.

[Shortly after, Tory attempts to jump over a wagon on a bike, failing spectacularly.]

Scottie: [to Tory, laughing] Why do I always laugh when you get hurt?

[Scottie removes the driveshaft from the car and presents it to Jamie.]

Scottie: For you—one nice, greasy part: guaranteed to get your shirt dirty.

Scottie: Smell that?

Kari: What's that?

Scottie: Bad things.

Adam: MythBusters took another car out of its misery.

Kari: I have to say the jackhammer makes you look really tough, the little red wagon...

Tory, Adam and Jamie in unison: Not so much

Exploding Port-a-Potty

Scottie: Maybe it's a myth that methane is flammable.

Adam: It's not a myth, we're just idiots.

Kari: I guess we don't have a Plan B because we kinda expected Plan A to go off without a hitch.

Adam: You should never, ever, ever expect Plan A to go off without a hitch. Usually, Jamie and I, it's Plan D.

Adam: This is the point of in day, which we come to many times, when we start to go, "What else do we have that's flammable in the truck?"

Real Car vs. Toy Car

Kari: [Holding toy car.] I got my first kiss over one of these. Then he punched me.

Adam: It's the newest kid thing. It's Brick Car! It's faster than anything and uglier than anything, too.

Jamie: And if you throw it at your brother really hard, it'll kill him!

Adam: Shall we race?

Jamie: Yeah, whatever.

Adam: 'Cause whoever wins this race is BETTER!

Adam: It looks like it was built for one thing: it was built for super speed!

Jamie: I think it looks like it was built for killing children. ...And what's all that crap on the back of it?

Adam: That's the rocket engine, man! That's the solid…rocket…fuel…boos…ter…thing!

Adam: Please note the Hyneman doing his careful straightening work. Jamie's people have been track-straighteners since the Middle Ages.

Buttered Toast

Kari: Y'know, my toast, my toast ALWAYS lands butter side up!

Ancient Battery

Tory: I'm building the Ark of the Covenant. Well, a replica.

[Just after Tory tests the electric fence through their contraption.]

Kari: On a scale of 1 to 10, what was the electrocution pain on that one?

Tory: Uh, I would say 211.

[Just after Scottie is shocked.]

Scottie: Holy! I feel like I just got punched in the chest!

Rob Lee (US Narrator): What he [Adam] doesn't know is they might have replaced the ancient batteries with an electric fence transformer...which would be the dirtiest trick in MythBusting history.

[Kari and Tory have hooked an electric fence generator into something Adam's going to be touching without his knowledge.]

Adam: Now, you guys haven't hooked in the electric fence thing in here, have you?

[Just after Adam is shocked.]

Kari: Did you feel God?

Son of a Gun

[A civil war recreationalist has just shot a bullet straight into a small cloth pouch over 50 feet away.]

Adam: Bloody hell, I think he did it…

Rob Lee (US Narrator): And in the pouch, well, let's just say a sample of genetic legacy has been obtained and dyed blue for easier visibility.

Jamie: Genetic legacy? IT'S SPERM! Any kid in grade school knows that! Helps make babies, you know!

On the Phone in a Thunderstorm

Adam: What are your plans, my master?

Jamie: We are going to take over the world.

Adam: Oh, yes.

Breaking Glass

Adam: The best-case scenario is that the glass shatters in my face! How do you think that makes me feel?

Jamie: Jamie, what am I doing wrong?

Jaime Vendera: You have got to shave your moustache!

(While Tory is constructing a Jet engine with vacuum parts):

Tory: Yeah...there's probably a bunch of engineers looking at me and going "What the hell is he doing here?!" And, ah...I've been asking myself that as well on a moment-by-moment basis...

Jet Pack

Adam: I love aluminum... aluminum, I love you.

Jamie: We're either gonna die, or we're gonna fly.

Adam: The problem with making two, is that once you've done one...you're only halfway there!

Pyramid Power

Adam: Can we not do any more of these "oogie-boogie" myths, please?

[After Tory has returned from shaving with numerous cuts on his face]

Tory: [to Kari] Baby give us a kiss, you don't find me hot, like this?

Kari: You look like hell!

Killer Brace Position

Kari: I promised my mom I wouldn't do anything dumb and unsafe again.

Tory: Looks like you didn't keep your promise.

[Kari dresses a dummy with a bra]

Jamie: Did she come with a bra?

Kari: We want it to be decent, this is a family show.

Jamie: Where did you get the bra? Did you give her yours?

Kari: No!

Cell Phones vs. Drunk Driving

Kari: Once again, I'm going to humiliate myself in front of a very large audience.

360° Swing

Tory: [After breaking a swing set and falling to the ground.] I'm so glad we had the mats!

Kari: Busted, but the rockets were spectacular.

Adam: Well, hopefully, that's our job…to strap rockets onto everything!

Jamie: Sounds like a good way to break your neck.

Jamie: Yet another everyday household item turned deadly.

Bulletproof Water

Adam: Well, that ought to silence most of our detractors on this one…but I expect we'll still get some complaints.

Jamie: Yeah, like you didn't use a cannon, or something.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Jamie's picked up enough ammunition to start a military coup.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): They have more guns here than in a Tarantino movie.

[Adam and Jamie are comparing the sizes of the .30-06 and .50 caliber bullets.]

Adam: (points to the .30-06 bullet) This kills you… (points to the .50 bullet) this kills you and everyone else in the room.

[Jamie prepares to fire the monster .50BMG into the pool.]

Adam: We should all get ready to break down and pack up…hopefully we'll be out of here before the pool completely drains.

Jamie: The worst case scenario today is someone dies from a bullet wound.

[Jamie is looking at a .50BMG round.]

Jamie: It's smaller than my head…it's all right.

[After Jamie fires a shotgun into a water tank, breaks the tank with the shot, and almost creates an electrocution risk in the workshop.]

Jamie: Well, it looks like we're not gonna be shooting any more guns off in the shop.

Border Slingshot

Adam: Ah, the hazards of giant slingshot-making.

Adam: Shockingly [holds up an improvised sling they had just used] that didn't work! I-I can't imagine why…

Adam: [holding up a bowling ball] Now this may look like one of the lost Seeing Stones from The Lord of the Rings, but it's actually an eight-pound bowling ball. What we're going to do is head out to some unsuspecting football field, rig up our unreasonably large slingshot to the goal posts, and probably embed this bowling ball somewhere in the next town.

[looking up at the completed border slingshot]

Adam: I think what we've got here is a thing.

Jamie: Looks like a big-a** slingshot to me.

Jamie: This is gonna kill you!

Jamie: Unfortunately, humans are big heavy things.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): The Boom-Lift Catapult tossed him a respectable 90 feet... if you include the 60 feet of boom. In Raccoon Rocket, 10 lbs. of black powder blasted him 80 feet. And in the myth of the Ming Dynasty Astronaut... well, he just got burnt to a cinder. Come to think of it, Buster could do with a launch break.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): And while Jamie is hard at work rigging up the rig, Adam is busy fulfilling the "goofing off" clause in his contract.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): The kid's a goner, but how's the slingshot?

[After Jamie tosses Simulaide Suzy into the slingshot yoke.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): When it comes to handling children, Jamie's old school.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): With an array of test-firings planned, Adam paints the projectile to guard against lead poisoning. Because that's bad.

Killer Tissue Box

[The team has tested the effect of a 45 MPH crash with an unsecured hatchet in the back of a car.]

Adam: This is your head. This is your head with an axe in it! Are we clear?

Jamie: I'm sure that there is a speed where a bobble-head could be lethal, but I don't think 45 mph is that speed.

Adam: So clearly the second spike was Buster twisting to get out of the way of the deadly tissue box!

Adam: That the tissue box is the only thing in the car that's completely undamaged might just prove the myth!

Hair Cream Decapitation

Grant: Well, I like danger.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): With the hard work done, Adam arrives.

Escape Slide Parachute

Adam: We're not leaving here without Buster, man. Leave no crash-test dummy behind!

[Shortly after Buster hits the ground from 400 feet.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Small Crash-Test Dummies, friends and family of Buster may find the following pictures disturbing.

Adam: [seeing Buster's remains] Oh no! Oh, my God! Oh, crime-iny!

Rob Lee: "Crime-iny"? So shocked he makes up a new word.

Adam: I think I'm calling the local fire department and seeing if they have any Simulaids.

MythBusters Revisited

[Kari, Tory, and Grant are borrowing Adam and Jamie's jet pack to retest a myth.]

Kari: If there is one scratch, one out of place bolt on this jet pack, Jamie and Adam will lock us in a closet for the rest of the season.

[Jamie has just suggested getting an RPG to blow up a car.]

Adam: That's the next revisit; someone's gonna write in and say, "you guys should have used an RPG, 'cause that would definitely have blown up the car!" and then we'll go get one of those, and then we'll blow up the car, and then there will be some other problem.

Jamie: And we're fine with that!

The Five Second Rule

Adam: I love having bacteriological…test stuff!

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Adam's as happy as a kid with a new chemistry set. Come to think of it, Adam is a kid with a new chemistry set.

Jamie: It's a shop…whaddya want?

Adam: I wanna be able to eat off the damn floor.

[Adam drops and then picks up a sandwich.]

Adam: Whoops! I picked it up within 3 seconds…would you eat it?

Jamie: I wouldn't eat it just because you handled it.

Adam: So, no french-kissing dogs I think is our conclusion here.

Jamie: I would be more inclined to say, no french-kissing Adam!

[Adam is handling some metal pans]

Adam: For some reason...I have the desire to smash them on my head.

Chinese Invasion Alarm

Tory: So, Jamie? If we, uh, find gold, are you gonna share it with me?

[Grant and Kari are making a drum.]

Kari: Y'know my people come from a long line of goat shavers, so I feel it's in my blood.

Grant: Apologies to everyone who actually makes their own drums…we have no idea what we're doing.

Confederate Rocket

Rob Lee: While the Boxer makes progress, the Hale is out for the count—because Jamie's made an error of schoolboy proportions, and, to avoid public humiliation...

Jamie: You know, if I don't talk, you don't get any good TV.

Rob Lee: ...he's run away from the cameraman.

Adam [of Jamie's welding slip-up]: What happened?

Jamie: …Nothing.

Rob Lee: 'Da Nile (denial) is a river in Africa.

Adam: C'mon, what happened? Did you accidentally weld the thing at the end of your pipe that was supposed to be a screw fitting?

Rob Lee: Overzealous welding has sealed his rocket shut, and he's not happy.

Jamie: [censored]

Adam: I've got a Boxer rocket, and I'm gonna fire it!

Jamie: I don't know, but I think that's one of the rockets, and, judging by the size of the hole, I - I think it's mine.

[He gestures toward a large hole in the dirt.]

Jamie: I don't know, I'll see if I can feel the end of it…

[He reaches a full arm's length in the hole.]

Jamie: [giggling] I'm still not touching anything!

Adam: This is where the danger zone happens. When nothing happens for a while, everyone's like "well, let's get closer… let's get closer… let's get closer…" and BOOM! everyone's dead.

[Adam and Jamie have just test-fired a rocket inside the workshop. The most immediate result is a lot of smoke.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): We clearly have ignition… but what the hell's going on in there?

[Inside, there is lots of smoke and several small fires.]

Rob Lee: Not so much "fire in the hole" as fire in the whole shop!

[Kari mixes to ingredients to gun cotton, with the ingredients replaced by a donkey bray and a rooster cackle respectively].

Rob Lee (US Narrator): So when you add "donkey" to "rooster," you got a violent reaction.

Compact Compact

Kari: A lot of things would have to go right for that plan to work…

[Following a near-disaster with a semi]

Adam: What was your plan for stopping these things?

Tory: Well, there wasn't really a plan…

Rob Lee (US Narrator): We've got ourselves a runaway (semi). Uh…Run away!

Adam: I'm a little sad because it didn't go exactly as planned. We may have to revisit this one, but WOW!!!

Kari: Did you actually think we were going to confirm this one?

Adam: This myth, much like the two trucks, and the car, is totally busted.

Jamie: Boy, is it busted!

Jamie: Let me see that pulley there...

Rob Lee (US Narrator): The biggest crash in Mythbuster's history, and he wants to see the pulley?

Adam: Some nice toggles! I'm saving those!

Grant: Dude, you're salvaging in the middle of a rescue operation?!

Adam: Why else do you think I got into this line of work?

[The tow rope has snapped, and a semi truck is now off course and out of control]

Tory: How do we stop this thing?

Rob Lee (US Narrator): That's a very good question...with no answer.

Vodka Myths

[After Grant smells Adam's feet]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): It's not foot odor, it's foot "oh dear!"

Adam: There is no dignity in television.

Kari: And this is the 'plastic bottle brand' vodka… [whispering] always the finest for MythBusters.

[Adam is eating crackers with limburger cheese on them.]

Kari: You know, my eyes are watering being in the vincinity of these three items. I think I need an official umm... Tester. So while you continue chewing. [Adam nods] Grant Imahara, I need your nose!

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Dead man walking.

[Kari is washing Adam's feet with Vodka.]

Grant: Would this be considered a perk of your Mythbusters experience?

Kari: Are you talking to me or him?

Adam: I have to say, I think there are going to be a lot of jealous fans out there that I'm getting my feet washed by you, Kari.

Grant: Now you know you've made it.

Bottle Rocket Jet Pack

Tory: See? Science IS fun.

Tory: What…the…hell are you guys doing?

Kari: (giggling) I'm a piñata!

Tory: Kari's too nervous, no more jokin'. Let's grim up.

Grant: I'm pumping as fast as I can!

[A water cooler bottle rocket carrying a 2kg weight launches surprisingly high into the air.]

Grant: Holy crap…run!

Steel Toe Amputation

Adam: I don't know about you, but that looks like some pretty crushed toes to me.

Seasickness-Kill or Cure

Adam: (on Jamie) He will ride in that chair, he will swallow his vomit...

Kari: (when Jamie won't yield to seasickness) He's just a little too amused with this, its starting to piss me off.

Tory: (in the seasick chair) This is fun! I could do this all day!

Adam: (on the wrist-strap seasickness cure) It may work for Barry Manilow, but it don't work for crap for me.

Paper Crossbow

[Adam is testing the holding strength of wood glue.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): It's been a while since Adam hurt himself on the show, but this setup has potential.

[Adam's test rig then separates and hits his fingers.]

Rob Lee: Yup, business as usual. 60 pounds of force across the knuckles is going to sting a little.

[Adam is seeing Jamie's version of the crossbow for the first time.]

Adam: Dude, if the full draw of the bow makes it collapse, is candy gonna pour out?

Jamie: Adam's, you could use as a club and it'd probably be just fine; you could still shoot it.

Jamie: I've always had a fascination with crossbows. I've had this one since I was a teenager. That's why there are no cats left in the neighborhood.

Adam: I can imagine the scene… [mimicking Jamie] Why, thank you, father…

Adam: [giggling] I shot Grant in the face!

Adam: [giggling] I got him right in his left nostril! Oh dude! that is so going right in his nose!

More Vodka Myths

Tory: [Commenting on the LED display of a clothes dryer.] It's done with a capital "E".

[As part of an experiment, Tory is spraying bees with vodka.]

Tory: Oh, it's terrible! They're drunk!

[Tory is trying to revive some of the bees sprayed with vodka.]

Kari: Wow, Tory, you're like some kind of bee whisperer!

[Tory and Grant are talking over if the bees are really dead or not.]

Grant: Why don't you do some Bee CPR? BPR!

Shredded Plane

[Jamie is having trouble starting a chainsaw.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): What? No elaborate setup? No scale tests? No blueprint plans? This could be the quickest Mythbust on record…if Jamie can start the chainsaw.

Archimedes Death Ray

[The MythBusters and the team from M.I.T. are trying to quickly set up for the test.]

Adam: Work faster, slaves let's go! Protect your masters!

Tory: What in the hell is that thing?!

Adam: It's the disco mirror from hell!

[after Prof. Wallace requests Jamie to move the ship directly in front of the mirror array]

Jamie: So holding still isn't good enough? We have to move into the line of fire?

Professor Wallace: Shut up, you lazy Roman pig, and do as you're told!

Helium Football

[Adam inhales some of the helium used to inflate some footballs]

Adam: Okay, these are ready. Don't tell him which ones we have.

[Adam has just inhaled some helium.]

Adam: Well, it's weird talking without any oxygen in your system…WOW!

Adam: There's still a couple anomalies, out of 10 there were 3. That's good enough for MythBusters.

Adam: It amazes me that you still don't realize we're filming a television show.

Jamie: I'd think we would at least aspire to not be idiots?

Adam: And yet we would fail.

[The MythBusters have just inflated a football until it burst. Afterwards, Adam puts it on his head.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): So there's your answer. At 110 PSI you'll lose a football, but gain a hat.

Jamie: What are you doing?

Adam: I put everything on my head.

Facts About Flatulence

Adam: My dignity and good television—they'll never meet.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): At least not on this show.

Adam: Roger that! We have flatus contained. AWOO-AH! AWOO-AH!

Franklin's Kite

Tory: Ballistics gel—I love it!

[A kite, whose tail has a rock tied to it, swoops toward Tory, barely missing his head.]

Tory: It's the death kite—the kite of punishment.

[The kite swings the rock and smacks Tory in the groin.]

Grant: [laughing] That made it all worthwhile!

Tory: Well, we killed a dead President.

Grant: He (Ben Franklin) was never President.

[Grant and Kari walk away, stifling giggles.]

Tory: Wasn't he? Damn it.

Kari: I've heard that in every schoolroom I've ever been in...'cause I've been in a lot.

Kari: It sounds really, really dangerous.

Grant: It could be very dangerous.

Tory: Or it could be a lot of fun.

Grant: Stability appears to be an issue.

Rob Lee: You don't say. Grant's kite is doing more spins than a washing machine.

Helium Raft

Adam: Look at this. It's a cathedral…of failure.

[Adam is stuck upside down in a net, suspended six feet in the air by a gigantic helium-filled raft.]

Adam: This wins as the strangest position I've ever been in...on this show.

Kari:[looking directly at the camera] Don't you love how he qualifies it with "on this show"?

Adam: [after inhaling helium] Once, in every generation, a myth comes along that does not thrill us.

Adam: I'm fine. I'm upside-down, in a net, under the biggest helium balloon thing you've ever seen, but I'm fine.

Cell Phones on a Plane

Rob Lee (US Narrator): The MythBusters feel the need. The need…to be very, very still.

Bullets Fired Up

Adam: I'm searching across the desert for a pencil-sized hole!

[Adam holds a plastic-wrapped pig's head over his face like a mask]

Adam: Jamie, please don't shoot bullets at my head.

Jamie: He's only got one ear.

Adam: We don't need ears to test the lethality of falling bullets.

Myths Reopened

Adam: With all the safety precautions we are taking, check this, check that, you have to stand back and say: Damn! I'm lightin' salamis man! I'm making a rocket out of meat!

[Jamie is examining the remains of the salami test rocket after it exploded.]

Jamie: There's meat everywhere!

Jamie: This may look like salami…it may smell like salami…it may even taste like salami…but its rocket fuel.

Jamie: Well, this is one of the strangest things I've ever done…I'm about to chuck a salami into the lathe!

Tory: I'm washing my gun.

Mind Control

Adam: So, guys, how did it go?

Tory: Psychic helmet totally works.

Adam: Really?

Tory: Actually, no, not really…

Dynamite Paint Job

[Jamie is naming his explosion painting contraption.]

Jamie: The flower of death.

Adam: Los flores de los muertos! (The flowers of the dead)

Adam: You're gonna paint your house with explosives? That's crazy!

Adam: Remember Kids, I have health insurance!

Exploding Pants

Adam: [to camera] If we don't meet again... I love you.

Kari: [while watching "rubbing machine"] This farmer sure's walking fast.

Tory: Well, he's in a hurry.

Tory: If it's worth doing it's worth overdoing, right?

[Buster is about to be blown up by explosive-coated overalls.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Friends and family of Buster should look away now.

Tory: Somebody ordered some exploding pants?

Grant: Well they singed the hell out him, but they didn't actually blow up, there was just a lot of fire.

Kari: You are so hard to please.

Tory: Yeah, if I was a farmer, and my pants did that, I'd say "my pants blew up!", I wouldn't worry about specifics.

[Tory is making explosives from herbicide]

Tory: Frank, why are you standing so far away?

Frank Doyle: Because I wanna continue to live.

Tory: So then the next question is, why am I standing so close?

Crimes and Myth-demeanors 1

Kari: (From a lift as the Build Team builds the assault course) Now remember that the safety word is "Run!"

Adam: I think Jamie's just going to be like [mimicking Jamie's impending crawl up the duct with magnets] "CHUNG!" "CHUNG!" "CHUNG!" And I believe, in a security manual the proper response to that sound coming from your duct is to just riddle your duct with bullets.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): With Grant and Kari heading up security, bullet riddling is unlikely. But with Tory… you never know.

Adam: [laughing as Jamie is noisily climbing the duct] Why, Thor, the god of thunder, is trying to enter my building!

Jamie: Surreptitious? I don't think so.

Jamie: Lets get cracking.

Adam: Um…cracking?

Jamie: What?

Adam: I guess I could break into a building too by beating on the ducting with a sledgehammer.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): (said as Jamie begins his ascent in the ductwork) Here's some key phrases from the surreptitious entry heist manual: Be the breeze [clang] As light as a feather [clang] The foot fall of a kitten [clang]

Kari: Is there anything more attractive than the sound of gum being chewed?

Tory: Yes there is, watching you chew that gum.

Breakfast Cereal

[Jamie has mixed some cardboard in the blender, and tasted the result.]

Jamie: Kinda reminds me of high school, for some reason.

[Adam tastes some liquified cardboard.]

Adam: Y'know, it tastes uncannily like cardboard.

Adam: Remember this, kids—cardboard is low in fat!

Steam Cannon

Adam: It's wedged in there like... I don't know if I could build something that could wedge it in there that hard...

[Adam looks back at the steam cannon.]

Adam: Oh - apparently, I did!

Jamie: But didn't we spend two seasons busting the last Archimedes myth?

Killer Whirlpool

[Holding a box for a model of a container ship.]

Adam: It's the toy every kid wants for Christmas! "Gee, thanks dad! Now I can replicate international commerce!"

[Adam has thrown up after being spun around in a whirlpool.]

Jess: Smells like pizza.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Welcome to the team, Jess.

[Adam pulls on a wetsuit in preparation for the whirlpool.]

Adam: [Imitating heavy French accent.] Is everybody ready for DIVING?!

Adam: Do you care to explain what we're doing 60 feet above the ground, standing above 9000 gallons of swirling water and...I'm in a wetsuit?

Jamie: Sure!

[Adam is floating on his back after being spun around in the whirlpool tank.]

Adam: Have you ever really looked at the sky?

Snowplow Flips Car

Grant: This is a cursed item. There are cursed items in the world and this is one of them. It's everything we try and do to it, goes wrong.

Grant: Make no mistake, this is a deathtrap.

Kari:I don't know but this feels very dangerous, I have a bad feeling about this, something is going to go wrong.

Grant: And that is different from the other times how...?

Diet Coke and Mentos

[Adam has made a nozzle on the lathe that looks remarkably like a lightsaber handle.]

Adam: ...I did what any boy would make—uh, what am I allowed to call it, a plasma sword?—except, instead of a limited beam of pure plasma, it's soda!

[Adam pretends he is fighting with the nozzle as if it is a lightsaber.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Not so much Yoda, but soda.

Adam: I have been a bubble sculptor for about 20 years. The Bubbles are very fine way to sculpt.

Adam: This is one I've known about for a long time, it's called "Dry ice bomb." Years ago I went to an ice company to pick up some stuff for Jamie, this was like 20 years ago, 15 years ago, and it said: "You can not buy dry ice unless you are 18", and I thought: "Why would that be." so I said "hey, how come you can't buy dry ice unless you are over 18", and the guy goes: (assumes a "surfer dude" voice) "Oh, 'cause you can stick it in a 2-liter bottle and make a huge bomb out of it; it blows up, it'll, like, set car alarms off across the street, it's really cool! (normal voice): and I thought "You're new here aren't you?" Since then I've always wanted to try it.

Rough Road Driving

Tory [talking on two-way radio to Grant] Okay, Grant…ready for your 45 mile an hour run? Paramedics are…nowhere to be found. [to camera crew] This may be the last time we see Grant.

Shattering Subwoofer

Jamie: [camera shows a shot of Jamie's shirt] This better work…my shirt's all dirty.

Jamie: We have three melodies...they're called First Gear, Second Gear, and Third Gear.

Adam: Inexplicably, Adam is wearing chainmail.

Earthquake Machine

Adam: We're 100 feet away, and I can still feel it moving the bridge…it's eerie.

Adam: And now we're going to see if we can shake this bridge apart.

Rob Lee: Uh, hold on Adam…

Adam: [in a flashback clip] I promise that if this works, we'll use this power only for good.

Rob Lee: Yeah, right Adam.

Rob Lee: Keen-eyed observers will note that the guys are actually standing on the bridge they're trying to destroy. Confidence in Tesla's machine isn't exactly sky high.

Adam: Neither Jamie or I give a high percentage of anything actually occurring out here, nonetheless MythBusters is nothing if not a compendium of ways in which Jamie and I have been wrong.

Stove Myths

Tory: I'll do the lava lamps.

Kari: I'll do the stove.

Grant: [pauses] …I'll do the math.

Rob Lee: While Grant calculates with what to do with his day off…

Grant: A theory is that the shock of cold water will— [lava lamp suddenly explodes]

Tory: [Laughs] You should have seen the look on your face, it was priceless.

Deadly Straw

Jamie: Hey, what do you think? You think we can get that wire to go all the way through an engine block?

Killer Cable Snaps

Adam: I love hearing big sounds in the next room.

Adam: [being whacked repetitively on the shoulder by the cable] Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow.

Adam: Oh please, please, let there be a pig cut in half in there!

Adam: (Referring to their lack of success in cutting the pig in half) Can we get a sword?

Jamie: (laughs) Meat cleaver?

Pottery Record

Rob Lee (US Narrator): The voice of an angel rings out...

Kari: TORY!

Rob Lee: ...or maybe, make that the devil.

Tory: That was a good one, Kari. Now I know what it would be like to be married to you.

Air Cylinder Rocket

Jamie: It was the lard that did it!

[A strange noise sounds when Jamie opens an air cylinder]:

Jamie: These tanks are actually filled with geese...and they're complaining.

Adam: (silence) Was that a joke? Fascinating...

Rough Road Driving

Tory: Alright, Grant. I'm ready to start breaking windows with rocks, but before I stick you in that car to shoot it, I wanna make sure we can actually break a windshield with a rock.

Exploding Lighter

Adam: The only thing that differentiates you and me from a couple of 14 year-old pyromaniacs... is ballistic glass.

Concrete Glider

Rob Lee (US Narrator): ...there's a chance that maybe Adam will let [Jamie] forget about it.

Adam: [imitating Jamie] It's not about winning or losing, it's about proving the concept. [normal voice, slightly giddy] But I won!

Rob Lee: But unlikely.

Anti-Gravity Device

Kari: You see that hole where it blasted off?

Tory: No.

Kari: Nope, neither do I.

22,000 Foot Fall

Adam: So, we need you guys's help. Um, we wanna focus on the large-scale experiment, and we want you guys to do the bench tests for us; the small-scale experiments.

Kari: Aye, aye, captain! Whatcha need?

Rob Lee: With a plan as concrete as that, what could possibly go wrong?

Adam: Perfect. I'll tell you what. Um, all we need is to get him up to 120 mph. That's a human's terminal velocity; we know that from upteen myths we've done about people falling.

Tory: Well, OK, considering we're going to be blowing up a sheet of glass, it's probably a good idea to, uh, give ourselves a little bit of protection.

Adam: Say it with me, "Jamie wants big boom!"

Lights on or Off?

Rob Lee: But first, they need to do some shopping, which will highlight another question: "How many MythBusters does it take to buy a lightbulb?"

Kari: These will explode, these will melt, this will kill you—this is great.

Grant: Welcome to my world.

Hindenburg Mystery

[Adam is holding two bottles, the labels of which have been obscured by the censor.]

Adam: This ingredient is made of blur. Ha! And this has blur in it too. Blur is very dangerous. You don't wanna mix blur with blur.

[Adam is about to demonstrate a thermite reaction.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): For this cooking lesson, Adam will need the fire suit, and it's safety masks all around. So…just like gumbo night at Adam's.

Adam: [after a thermite square ignites without warning] Deuteronomy!

[Adam has just lit a panel of cotton. It is burning extremely slowly in contrast to the rapid destruction of the Hindenburg.]

Adam: We don't need a high-speed on this, we need a time-lapse.

[Cue time-lapse of the panel burning.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Anything you say, Adam.

[The first test Hindenburg catches fire and nearly burns out in the shop.]

Adam: That would be the textbook definition of irony, kids...

Adam: Next on Discovery, the world's deadliest piñata!

[Adam had just ignited the hydrogen under a skin sample covering a wooden box, which explodes violently.]

Adam: WOAH! (in quiet, timid-ish voice) Ok... is everybody ok?

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Eh... fresh underwear for Mr. Savage, please.

Exploding Nitro Patch

Kari: High explosives and electricity. Woooo!

Dog Myths

Jamie: Now behave, or we're going to make you into a coat.

Adam: So, can you clearly communicate what clever canine conundrum you're currently concocting?

Jamie: What?

Adam: What's the myth?

Myths Reopened

Tory: [Holding shotgun] Boy, you'd better marry my daughter!

Walking on Water

Adam: If I had any dignity, that would have been humiliating.

Adam: Come, Silent Walrus, let us storm the castle!

[While wearing comically large pontoons on his feet with an array of diving gear.]

Adam: Oh, I am as stealthy as the night. Don't I look like silent death, bringing justice in the night?

"Viewers' Pick Special"

Adam: It bleeds!

Jamie: One way to tell that Mythbusters has been in the area: look for shrapnel in the trees.

Hot Bullets

[Jamie is about to shoot an oven door with a shotgun.]

Adam: All right, Jamie, here's your motivation: this oven door is run off with your wife, [Jamie laughs] and you've decided to gear up and get even. So go for it!

[Jamie shoots oven door couple of times. Adam starts laughing at the second shot.]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): I guess the moral is: don't elope with Mrs. Hyneman.

Red Flag to a Bull

Rob Lee (US Narrator): …and our trio of tall-tale tacklers (are) speaking in bull.

Grant: Moooo!

Tory: Those are whales.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): …and Grant stunt-double requires an CPR.

[Grant is seen performing "CPR" on his dummy.]

Grant: Don't give up on me now!

Tory: Are you done playing with yourself?

Bull in a China Shop

Grant: You know how they say Tory is like a bull in a china shop?

Tory: No.

Kari: Yes.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): So the first guy has let the team down. They were expecting a bull in a china shop to be like…well, a bull in a china shop.

Grappling Hook

Adam: It’s a key component on the belt of Nocturnal-Echo-Locating-Flying-Mammal-Man.

Jamie: Batman?

Adam: Yes. Shhh!

Jamie: You all set, Batman?

Adam: I'm all set, Boy Wonder.

Ring Punch

Grant: So, you named your guy there?

Tory: Yes.

Grant: What did you name him?

Tory: Pork-loin-io.

Kari: You did not.

Tory: He's an evil pig, man.

90 Degree Turn

[The force of the hook shooter causes both the hook and shooter to fire with great force—in opposite directions.]

Kari: Ah, the Newton's Laws! We forgot the Newton's Laws!

Tory: (regarding the hook shooter) That was that first time I ever felt any danger.

Tory: Holy air cannon Grantman!

Grant: How long have you been waiting to unleash that one?

Tory: All day!

Exploding Water Heater

Rob Lee (US Narrator): The water heater shot up so high, you could order a pizza while you wait.

Adam: (stepping out of the house they built) Hi everyone! Welcome to the Mythbusters Clubhouse!

Adam: House? What house?

Pants on Fire

Kari: [about the myth] This has Tory, written all over it!

Tory: Why am I always written all over it?

Shrinking Pants

Kari: Are you ready to let go of the muffin top?

Grant: I am ready to let go of the muffin top.

Tory: But is the muffin top ready to let go of you?

Supersize Shark

Adam: Blue Pointer 2. Makes me wonder what happened to the Blue Pointer 1.

Supersize Jet Taxi

Tory: [Putting a 20-dollar bill in Buster's shirt pocket, in taxi] Keep the change.

Rob Lee (US narrator): So, Buster…any last words?

Buster: Adam, I am your father….

Rob Lee: Oooh, interesting.

Buster: I wonder if Mike Rowe is hiring?

Supersize Rocket Car

Jamie: Go ahead, tailgate, see if I care.

Supersize Cruise Ship Waterskiing

Tory: [in the water with a bird next to him] Hey buddy. You better not attract any sharks, you little [censored].

Shooting Fish In A Barrel

.
[after Jamie has fired hundreds of rounds at the bass with an M134 minigun]

Adam: The people at home want more! Right, guys? You want more? Okay, they want more, Jamie!

Adam: My head is sticking out of the bottom of the barrel. [pauses]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): We need to stress that no fish have been or will be injured in filming this myth. They're mostly blown to pieces.

Hot Chili Cures

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Sombreros, boots and bandoleers. A desperately cliché battle looms between the tragically uncool, the undeniably hot... and these two idiots.

Grant: [about the fact that he hasn't eaten this much spicy food] I hope that my head doesn't explode.

[after the toothpaste failed to work]

Grant: Toothpaste stays in the bathroom; not on the dinner table!

Grant: My Prediction: Pain. And lots of it

Elephants Scared Of Mice

Adam: You expose the mouse and all hell breaks loose!

Adam: So, how are we going to get this mouse to those elephants over there?

Jamie: Slingshot.

Rob Lee (US narrator): MacGyver and elephant dung. Must've missed that episode.

Pirates 2

Grant: [As Tori and Kari start to water down the sand] It's like watering a little Grant flower.

Adam: I hope I don't step on a octopus.

Tory: I've been a baaad pirate.

Airplane Hour

Airplane simulator: Don't sink.

Jamie: Why is it telling me not to think?

Airplane simulator: Don't sink.

[After Jamie crashes a flight simulator]

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Jamie hits the deck, putting the terror into terra firma.

[Discussing a myth that will involve Tory skydiving.]

Kari: Logistically, it's a little more complicated than just throwing a dummy out of a plane.

[Camera shot moves to broken dummy.]

Rob Lee: Logistically, more difficult. [Camera shot slides over to show Tory and the dummy side by side.] But essentially the same.

James Bond Special 1

Jamie: It's Hyneman. James Hyneman.

Grant: My name is Grant... Imahara. What's my name?

Kari: Anyone else feel like an evil genius? (Tory guffaws)

Grant: Bye-bye, double-oh Buster! (all three laugh manically)

Lead Balloon

Jamie: [whilst making the fragile lead balloon]] Little did the MythBusters know there was a herd of cattle in the next room!

Surfing with Dynamite

[Tory leaps into tub of water]

Tory: Yahoo!

Grant: Have you lost your damn mind?

James Bond Special 2

[Tory is sitting next to statue]

Tory: [In Italian accent] So, I finish my statue, and I like to call her 'Hey, there, Lonely Girl', but I canna' look at her too long, 'cause she make me cry. So, now were gonna try to chop her head off!

[Statues are being brought in]

Grant: Hey, be careful with those statues, I hear the heads fall off at the drop of a hat.

MacGyver Special

[Adam is working on picking the lock on his and Jamie's cell door]

Grant: Well, he's got the filaments, and he has lockpick experience.

Tory: Can we just pump in the nerve gas now?

Sharks 2

Rob Lee (US Narrator): But it seems that either the sun or the jet lag has got to Tory.

Tory: We are going to shtart at the giant iguana. And if that doesn't happen, we will go north until we see the two humongous parrots. Hopefully they won't eat us. And let's not forget the floating dolphin head! Everyone wants to see it! I know I do!

Grant: Oh, damn you and your science!

Grant: Oh {censored}, something just touched me!

Grant: I just want to say to whatever fans posted this on the fan-site, I hate you. I hate you! I HATE YOU!

Cabin Fever

Kari:Can I remind you that I'm in the exact same conditions as they are, except I have to watch them be bored?

Kari: I'm pulling a trick on Jamie and Adam, with the help of: Mr. Abominable Snowman!

Kari: Haha! Adam's hiding in the toilet! (sticks out tongue at the screen displaying Adam's sheer bravery)

Moose Mayhem

Tory: Do ya think I'm excited? You better believe I'm excited. We just built a rubber moose and now we're gonna crash cars into it. It doesn't get better than this.

Phonebook Friction

[While interleaving two phone books together.]

Adam: Does this remind you of when you used to count money for the mob?

Jamie: I was a hitman. I wasn't a money counter.

[Two military tanks are attached to two phonebooks, in order to pull them apart]

Jamie: I just wanted to make a phone call. That's all I wanted to do!

Beer Goggles

[While drunk.]

Kari: What is red and smells like blue paint?

Adam: I don't know. What?

Kari: Red paint.

Stone Cold Sober

[After Adam gets slapped by Jamie.]

Adam: Holy bleeping bleepity bleep!

Viewer Sequel Threequel

Rob Lee: It's Crouching Savage, Hidden Hyneman.

Jamie: Well, we've got our bamboo. It's time to go back to the shop and torture some dummies.

Tory: We're gonna blow the CRAP out of that toilet! Get it?

Adam: [In French accent] Jamie is imagining himself to be a plant.

Jamie: This may look nice and sunny. And it is. But it's also a torture chamber. Or will be soon.

Tory: Yeah, normally Grant's a better shot when he's using the toilet.

Tory: I feel like I've been lied to. What I saw on that internet video was an explosion.

Kari: Next on Mythbusters, extreme plumbing!

Adam: I ate a radio for science!

Jamie: [referring to whether brandy from a St. Bernard will bring a person back from the brink of death] Or this is like an aperatif before I eat the dog.

Adam: You can't say that!

Kari: It's always a good day when you start it at the bomb range.

Grant: We love pianos. We're not enjoying this in the least. ...Okay, maybe just a little bit.

J.D. Nelson: What I think you need is the MythBusters Concerto in C4.

Clothed vs. Unclothed

Adam: Man, Jamie, it snowed like crazy out here last night!

Jamie: Yeah, this is how it snows in San Francisco: in plastic bags!

Jamie: Can we show a naked snowman on television? This is a family show.

Adam: Maybe we'll put a fig leaf.

Adam: [Imitating Jamie] Just remember, everyone, we're working in a really cold environment, so if your fingers start to lose feeling, make sure you go inside and get a cup of tea or something.

Jamie: Let's count 'em down [the top 10 most popular myths] Top 40 style.

Adam: All right, get ready for your favorite myth!

Silver Spoon and Champagne

Adam: [pours a glass of champagne] Ooh, I'm feeling lightheaded already. It's like drinking stars!

[Jamie and Adam do a blind taste test to test the fizziness of the champagne.]

Rob Lee: Maybe it's the holiday spirit. For once they agree!

Jamie: Another Christmas myth up the chimney.

Buster Special

Adam: I just had one of those "what the hell are we doing" moments!

[On Buster's new skin]

Jamie: I don't like the pink color, it's creepy.

Adam: Yeah, it's creepy, but so is what we do to Buster.

Shop till You Drop

[Jamie is holding a manly thong.]

Jamie: A lot of people watch this show. I'm sure some of them are gonna thinking about me wearing this particular piece of clothing on. Um... [chuckles] and uh... I'm gonna put it away now.

MythBusters Outtakes

Adam: [in a British accent] It's a lovely sculpture. It's all about man's inhumanity to man…in a pipe and rope sort of way.

Adam: If we appear on Letterman or Leno and we bring our famous chicken cannon and shoot it off. I want someone to get on their knees and just blow me.

MythBusters Revealed

Peter Rees (executive producer): [to Jamie] Why don't you ever pretend to be like Adam?

Jamie: What? You mean stupid?

Peter Rees: Adam… is a disaster area.

Kari: Tory tends to clean up, Jamie is neurotic about cleaning up, and Adam is the Tasmanian Devil of filth.

Adam: [In strange accent] Do not try what you are about to see at home. We are what you call 'experts'.

[Silence]

Jamie: [In normal voice] And what am I supposed to say?

Adam: [In strange accent, moving Jamie's jaw by hand] That is right, we do this for a living.

[Kari is dancing and clowning around.]

Tory: Not a lot going on upstairs; but God, she's cute!

Adam: [In erudite British accent] Here we see the Hyneman in his natural habitat. The Hyneman prefers to live in an extremely clean environment, removing all detritus from its surroundings... at every opportunity.

MythBusters Jaws Special

Adam: We've got a robot in the water, he's stuffed with tuna, and it's just another day here at MythBusters.

[Jamie is underwater in a shark cage holding Buster while he's attempting to punch sharks. The shark attacks are getting aggressive.]

Jamie: I just had one of those "what the hell am I doing" moments, over.

Kari: If I see a shark coming up with a beret, I'm gonna be mad at you.

Kari: Now that he's not so scared, it's a little less evil.

Kari: I think we need to have one of us get into the chainmail. Not me.

Adam: Not me.

Kari: Clearly Jamie.

Jamie: I understanding these things [SCUBA tanks] have about a million—or actually, it's 1.3 million—pounds of explosive force. I'm not sure what that means, but it sounds like a lot.

[After being loaned some of the original floating barrel props used in the movie Jaws.]

Adam: The only thing we're told we can't do is burn them, blow them up, or lose them.

Tory: Has he watched the show?

Mega Movie Myths 2-Hour Special

Adam: "Danger" is my middle name.

Jamie: I'm a little worried because it worked too well, so now we'll go full scale, and it'll blow up.

Jamie: I now pronounce this "Hyneman Mountain."

Jamie: We're going to jump the hump.

Pirate Myths

Adam: It's time for some pillagin', it's time for some robbin', it's time to blow some stuff up.

Cannonball vs. Shrapnel

Adam: That's one of the most wrongity wrong things we've ever done.

Adam: The Blowhard 3000—the next evolution in pirate technology!

Adam: I just don't want any leaks. I don't like leaks.

[A large tumbleweed comes up to Adam as he's sanding down the cannonball.]

Adam: That's not a pirate thing! That's a tumbleweed! On ya go...

Adam: (pretending to be a Pirate) What do ya mean we got no more cannonballs?!

Eyepatch Fad

Adam: Let's pillage!

Tory: I don't know if that's legal in California.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Kari's off to see an opthima-... an optha-... an eye doctor.

Rob Lee (US Narrator): Kari's got the science behind the myth covered, and if she can just find her way to the door, we'll be on our way.

[Kari fumbles briefly with the door before turning to the ophthalmologist in exasperation.]

Kari: I can't see anything still.

Kari: (In an odd voice) Booty goes inside it!

"Tory": (Cuban accent) 'Chu wanna play rough? OK. Say 'ello to my little friend.

Holiday Special

[Adam and Jamie open a box of newly arrived toy monkeys]

Adam: There we go, oh, they're hideous!

[Jamie tests Mentos and Cola apparatus]

Jess: Ha ha, Jamie, that's excellent! Sort of.

[A forklift lifts Buster into position]

Adam: Rise, my son!