Directed by Arthur Hiller. Written by Colin Higgins.

Grover Muldoon

• [to George] That's bad, man! You're lookin' good! Now here, take this radio. When you step out of here, step out like King Shit. You bad! Put that radio to your ear. That's gonna help cover your face. Just move with the rhythm of the music. Move your body with the rhythm of the music. That's all you gotta remember, okay? Let me see you try it. Step to the music. Step to the music. Yeah. Step to the music. Stop. How come you whiteys got such a tight ass, man? How are you gonna walk outta here with a tan face and that white walk? Just get into the music. Come on, George. Loosen up. Listen to the beat. Let your feet move. Now, do it! Can't you feel it? The tempo's right here. Right in there. That's all you gotta do. Yeah, now try it! Don't you feel it? Yeah. Needs work, George. Needs a lot of work. You know that? Will you practice? Man, you gotta practice, but let it be loose! Listen to the music. Follow the beat. Hear?

Dialogue

Hilly: What do you publish?

George: Oh, mostly nonfiction. Gardening, cook books, how-to-do-it books.

Hilly: Like sex manuals?

George: I've edited a few.

Hilly: An authority, huh?

George: I know what goes where...and why.

Hilly: That's very interesting. Are you married?

George: Divorced.

Hilly: How come?

George: My friends all told me that my wife was too good for me...and after a couple of years I decided they were right.

George: I can't get over the size of this room without the partition. They are small rooms by themselves.

Hilly: They're perfect for juggling.

George: For what?

Hilly: For juggling. When you practice...the balls would always bounce off the walls.

George: Do you juggle a lot?

Hilly: I know what goes where and why.

George: I like that song. If I ever hear it again...it'll be difficult not to think of you.

Hilly: You put that very nicely.

George: Thanks. To traveling by train. Trains that pass in the night.

Sheriff Chauncey: Is he with the Feds?

George: Who?

Sheriff Chauncey: This guy Rembrandt.

George: Rembrandt is dead.

Sheriff Chauncey: Dead? That makes four. Listen, fella, are you sure you're not making this up as you go along? I'm an officer of the law and I got a lot better things to do than listen to that kind of funnin'.

[buzzer sounds]

Sheriff Chauncey: That's my hotline. Now you take your time to get your facts straight 'cause when I come back I want your answers clear and to the point. Got that? And you can start with who shot Rembrandt!

George: What do you think?

Grover: I think you better make a right up here and then a sharp left. I'm coming over.

[climbs over the seat. George suddenly swerves the car, causing Grover to lunge forward]

Grover: Jesus Christ, man! That's how you murdered your victims? Put 'em in a car and bounced 'em to death?

George: Sorry!

Grover: Sorry, my ass! You dangerous. Proves one thing, though: you don't do this for no living.

George: No I don't.

Grover: [attempting to hotwire a Jaguar] I'm following the plan. Just changed my mind.

George: Are you crazy? I thought we were gonna take the Chevy in back.

Grover: Chevy? That's a jerk-off, man. This here is pure pussy.

George: Pure pussy? Tell that to the judge.

Grover: Don't worry about no judge, Man, this thing gonna get us to Kansas City on time.

George: How about jail? Did you know that the office is right in front of us?

Grover: You thinking about her?

George: Yeah. Crazy thing is I just met her two nights ago.

Grover: That's the way love is. I always lose my memory when I fall in love.

George: [to himself, in the mirror] Come on, man, get some jive goin'. Be cool. Shake it, but don't break it. That's it. Hey, man, how do I look? You look sharp, mister. I feel sharp! You look sharp, mister. I feel sharp! You hear? I feel like the sun around midnight. You dig? Outta sight! Get down! Get down! Feelin' good! Feelin' fine! Feelin' real fine! That's it. Just loosen up those hips, sugar. All you whiteys got a tight ass. Yeah, get that ass movin'. Outta sight! I'm a macaroni! Get down! I'm the king! Number one, baby! [Shoe Shiner enters] Um, um, I'm not...

Shoe Shiner Hey, you must be in pretty big trouble, fella. But for God's sake, learn to keep time.

Grover: Give me the gun. [George hands him the gun] Now, give me your wallet.

George: What the...

Grover: I gotta buy a disguise...a porter's uniform.

George: You know, these disguises are getting expensive.

Grover: What can I say, man? Crime costs.

Devereau: The Silver Streak does have its drawbacks, but please try the marmalade. They do provide an excellent cuisine.

Grover: Oh, thank you, sir. I'll tell the boys in the kitchen. We aims to please. Coffee, miss?

Hilly: No, thanks.

Grover: He ain't bullshittin' about the cuisine.

Devereau: Steward?

Grover: Is that your lady, man? She's somethin' else.

Devereau: Steward!

Grover: Stand up, mama. Let me get a look at you.

Devereau: Steward!

Grover: Mm, mm, mm! Have mercy!

Devereau: Steward, you may go.

Grover: Just a little more coffee?

Devereau: No, thank you.

Grover: Half a cup? [pours coffee in Devereau's lap] Oh, sorry, sir. Look what I've done.

Devereau: You... Get out of...

Grover: See what I've done...

Devereau: You ignorant nigger!

Grover: [pulling a gun] Who you callin' nigger, huh? You don't know me well enough to call me no nigger! I'll slap the taste out your mouth! You don't even know my name! I'll whoop your ass! Beat the white off your ass!

Hilly: Who are you?

Grover: I'm a thief.

George: It's all right, Hilly. He's a friend of mine.

Cast

• Gene Wilder - George Caldwell
• Jill Clayburgh - Hilly Burns
• Richard Pryor - Grover Muldoon
• Patrick McGoohan - Roger Devereau
• Ned Beatty - Bob Sweet
• Clifton James - Sheriff Oliver Chauncey
• Ray Walston - Mr. Edgar Whiney
• Stefan Gierasch - Prof. Schreiner & Johnson
• Len Birman - Chief Donaldson
• Valerie Curtin - Plain Jane
• Lucille Benson - Rita Babtree
• Scatman Crothers - Ralston
• Richard Kiel - Reace
• Fred Willard - Jerry Jarvis