Acorn Antiques
Encyclopedia
Acorn Antiques is a parodic
soap opera
written by Victoria Wood
as a regular feature in the two seasons of Victoria Wood As Seen On TV
, which ran from 1985 to 1987. It was turned into a musical by Wood, opening in 2005.
. She based it on the long-running ATV
serial Crossroads, and radio soap Waggoners Walk. Swipes were also taken at current soaps such as EastEnders
and Coronation Street
with their apparent low production values, wobbly sets, overacting
, appalling dialogue and wildly improbable plots.
Its premise - the lives and loves of the staff of an antiques shop in a fictional English town called Manchesterford - hardly reflects the ambitious and implausible storylines, which lampooned the staples of soap operas: love triangles, amnesiacs, sudden deaths and siblings reunited.
It also satirised the shortcomings of long-running dramas produced on small budgets with its little artificial-looking set, missed cues, crude camera work and hasty scripts. A lack of continuity is seen in distinct lapses where storylines are introduced and dropped between episodes and character development is forgotten. One episode, for example, is introduced as reflecting the current interest in health fads with a plot where the antiques shop is merged into a 'Leisure centre and sunbed centre', never to be mentioned again. The deliberately haphazard opening and end credits, together with its tinny title music, also lampooned Crossroads. Perhaps the most comical element of Acorn Antiques were the missed cues, harking back to the days when Crossroads was recorded live. Fictional floor managers and directors can be heard prompting the dreadful actors to say their lines, whilst the end of several scenes show the actors not quite knowing what to do with themselves while the camera is still rolling.
References to other daytime television devices featured; after one episode a continuity announcer mentions an exhibition of costumes from the show touring several British towns, and after another episode a range of novelisations is mentioned (bearing such archetypical purple
titles as A Waning Moon, and little resemblance to screened storylines). The announcement that the show's theme tune was available to buy as Anyone Can Break A Vase sung by Miss Babs, was a reference to the release of Anyone Can Fall In Love, based on the EastEnders theme and sung by one of its cast members, Anita Dobson
.
Wood also created a spoof arts documentary about the show for her As Seen on TV special, in keeping with similar straight-faced 'behind-the-scenes' shows produced about soap operas, which revealed the shambolic production of Acorn Antiques being put together, and interviewed the self-obsessed fictional actors behind the fictional characters. At one point, when an obvious continuity error is pointed out, the hard-nosed producer 'Marion Clune' (played by Maggie Steed
) summed up the directorial attitude: "We professionals notice - Joe Public never clocks a darn thing." The documentary also depicted the actress portraying the drudge Mrs. Overall as being an archetypal soap diva
called Bo Beaumont (although in the series the fictional end titles shows Mrs Overall credited to Julie Walters
).
In the final show of Victoria Wood As Seen on TV a sketch was shown where the actors playing Mrs Overall and Mr Clifford are supposedly sacked from the soap and killed off and Bo Beaumont/Julie Walters breezes out of the studio, complaining to the TV news crew outside "Does a faithful dog expect to be kicked? That show was my life."
The sketches even lead to a fanzine and appreciation gatherings where fans would dress up as the characters. In 2004, in a poll on its website, Channel 4
voted Acorn Antiques the 7th best comedy sketch of all time.
The show made a brief return to television in 1992 in Victoria Wood's All Day Breakfast, her satire on daytime television. A sketch of its soap, The Mall, ends with Mrs Overall returning to reopen Acorn Antiques, mentioning that the other principal characters had been killed in a bus crash (even though she herself had been killed off in the final episode of the original series). A special one off episode was broadcast in 1996 in a programme to commemorate 70 years of BBC1 being on air. One final sketch was shown in 2001 with the original cast and Nick Frost
as an armed robber (as part of Victoria's History of Sketch Comedy BBC1 series).
In 2005, Victoria Wood
created a musical version, with key members of the original cast (Julie Walters
, Celia Imrie
amongst others - Wood
alternated with Julie Walters
in the role of Mrs Overall), which had a sellout season in the West End.
The show earned several Olivier Award nominations, and winning Best Supporting Actress in a Musical for Celia Imrie
. The original run was directed by Trevor Nunn
. Standout songs included "Have You Met Miss Babs?" and "Macaroons".
It was revived on tour in 2007, directed by Victoria Wood
.
Leighton Maqueraders in 2010 were the first amateur drama group to do the show in 2010. Acorn Antiques The Musical ran at Leighton Buzzard Library Theatre from June 16–19.
Leighton Masqueraders performed the comedy to a full house and the production impressed their star guest Victoria wood, writer of the musical.
Parody
A parody , in current usage, is an imitative work created to mock, comment on, or trivialise an original work, its subject, author, style, or some other target, by means of humorous, satiric or ironic imitation...
soap opera
Soap opera
A soap opera, sometimes called "soap" for short, is an ongoing, episodic work of dramatic fiction presented in serial format on radio or as television programming. The name soap opera stems from the original dramatic serials broadcast on radio that had soap manufacturers, such as Procter & Gamble,...
written by Victoria Wood
Victoria Wood
Victoria Wood CBE is a British comedienne, actress, singer-songwriter, screenwriter and director. Wood has written and starred in sketches, plays, films and sitcoms, and her live stand-up comedy act is interspersed with her own compositions, which she accompanies on piano...
as a regular feature in the two seasons of Victoria Wood As Seen On TV
Victoria Wood As Seen On TV
Victoria Wood As Seen On TV was a British comedy sketch series starring comedienne Victoria Wood, with Julie Walters, Celia Imrie, Duncan Preston, Susie Blake and Patricia Routledge...
, which ran from 1985 to 1987. It was turned into a musical by Wood, opening in 2005.
Television version
Wood originally wrote Acorn Antiques as a weekly slot in her sketch shows Victoria Wood As Seen On TVVictoria Wood As Seen On TV
Victoria Wood As Seen On TV was a British comedy sketch series starring comedienne Victoria Wood, with Julie Walters, Celia Imrie, Duncan Preston, Susie Blake and Patricia Routledge...
. She based it on the long-running ATV
Associated TeleVision
Associated Television, often referred to as ATV, was a British television company, holder of various licences to broadcast on the ITV network from 24 September 1955 until 00:34 on 1 January 1982...
serial Crossroads, and radio soap Waggoners Walk. Swipes were also taken at current soaps such as EastEnders
EastEnders
EastEnders is a British television soap opera, first broadcast in the United Kingdom on BBC One on 19 February 1985 and continuing to today. EastEnders storylines examine the domestic and professional lives of the people who live and work in the fictional London Borough of Walford in the East End...
and Coronation Street
Coronation Street
Coronation Street is a British soap opera set in Weatherfield, a fictional town in Greater Manchester based on Salford. Created by Tony Warren, Coronation Street was first broadcast on 9 December 1960...
with their apparent low production values, wobbly sets, overacting
Overacting
Overacting is the exaggeration of gestures and speech when acting. It may be unintentional, particularly in the case of a bad actor, or be required for the role. For the latter, it is commonly used in comical situations or to stress the evil characteristics of a villain...
, appalling dialogue and wildly improbable plots.
Its premise - the lives and loves of the staff of an antiques shop in a fictional English town called Manchesterford - hardly reflects the ambitious and implausible storylines, which lampooned the staples of soap operas: love triangles, amnesiacs, sudden deaths and siblings reunited.
It also satirised the shortcomings of long-running dramas produced on small budgets with its little artificial-looking set, missed cues, crude camera work and hasty scripts. A lack of continuity is seen in distinct lapses where storylines are introduced and dropped between episodes and character development is forgotten. One episode, for example, is introduced as reflecting the current interest in health fads with a plot where the antiques shop is merged into a 'Leisure centre and sunbed centre', never to be mentioned again. The deliberately haphazard opening and end credits, together with its tinny title music, also lampooned Crossroads. Perhaps the most comical element of Acorn Antiques were the missed cues, harking back to the days when Crossroads was recorded live. Fictional floor managers and directors can be heard prompting the dreadful actors to say their lines, whilst the end of several scenes show the actors not quite knowing what to do with themselves while the camera is still rolling.
References to other daytime television devices featured; after one episode a continuity announcer mentions an exhibition of costumes from the show touring several British towns, and after another episode a range of novelisations is mentioned (bearing such archetypical purple
Purple prose
Purple prose is a term of literary criticism used to describe passages, or sometimes entire literary works, written in prose so extravagant, ornate, or flowery as to break the flow and draw attention to itself. Purple prose is sensually evocative beyond the requirements of its context...
titles as A Waning Moon, and little resemblance to screened storylines). The announcement that the show's theme tune was available to buy as Anyone Can Break A Vase sung by Miss Babs, was a reference to the release of Anyone Can Fall In Love, based on the EastEnders theme and sung by one of its cast members, Anita Dobson
Anita Dobson
Anita Dobson is an English television actress and singer. She gained her highest profile while playing Angie Watts in the BBC soap opera, EastEnders...
.
Wood also created a spoof arts documentary about the show for her As Seen on TV special, in keeping with similar straight-faced 'behind-the-scenes' shows produced about soap operas, which revealed the shambolic production of Acorn Antiques being put together, and interviewed the self-obsessed fictional actors behind the fictional characters. At one point, when an obvious continuity error is pointed out, the hard-nosed producer 'Marion Clune' (played by Maggie Steed
Maggie Steed
Maggie Steed is an English actress and comedienne.-Youth:After studying drama at the Bristol Old Vic Theatre School in Bristol, she left the theatre for several years.-Career:...
) summed up the directorial attitude: "We professionals notice - Joe Public never clocks a darn thing." The documentary also depicted the actress portraying the drudge Mrs. Overall as being an archetypal soap diva
Diva
A diva is a celebrated female singer. The term is used to describe a woman of outstanding talent in the world of opera, and, by extension, in theatre, cinema and popular music. The meaning of diva is closely related to that of "prima donna"....
called Bo Beaumont (although in the series the fictional end titles shows Mrs Overall credited to Julie Walters
Julie Walters
Julie Walters, CBE is an English actress and novelist. She came to international prominence in 1983 for Educating Rita, performing in the title role opposite Michael Caine. It was a role she had created on the West End stage and it won her BAFTA and Golden Globe awards for Best Actress...
).
In the final show of Victoria Wood As Seen on TV a sketch was shown where the actors playing Mrs Overall and Mr Clifford are supposedly sacked from the soap and killed off and Bo Beaumont/Julie Walters breezes out of the studio, complaining to the TV news crew outside "Does a faithful dog expect to be kicked? That show was my life."
The sketches even lead to a fanzine and appreciation gatherings where fans would dress up as the characters. In 2004, in a poll on its website, Channel 4
Channel 4
Channel 4 is a British public-service television broadcaster which began working on 2 November 1982. Although largely commercially self-funded, it is ultimately publicly owned; originally a subsidiary of the Independent Broadcasting Authority , the station is now owned and operated by the Channel...
voted Acorn Antiques the 7th best comedy sketch of all time.
The show made a brief return to television in 1992 in Victoria Wood's All Day Breakfast, her satire on daytime television. A sketch of its soap, The Mall, ends with Mrs Overall returning to reopen Acorn Antiques, mentioning that the other principal characters had been killed in a bus crash (even though she herself had been killed off in the final episode of the original series). A special one off episode was broadcast in 1996 in a programme to commemorate 70 years of BBC1 being on air. One final sketch was shown in 2001 with the original cast and Nick Frost
Nick Frost
Nicholas John "Nick" Frost is an English actor, comedian and screenwriter. He is best known for his work with Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg in the role of Mike Watt in the television comedy Spaced, as well as the film characters Ed in Shaun of the Dead, PC/Sgt...
as an armed robber (as part of Victoria's History of Sketch Comedy BBC1 series).
The Musical
In 2005, Victoria Wood
Victoria Wood
Victoria Wood CBE is a British comedienne, actress, singer-songwriter, screenwriter and director. Wood has written and starred in sketches, plays, films and sitcoms, and her live stand-up comedy act is interspersed with her own compositions, which she accompanies on piano...
created a musical version, with key members of the original cast (Julie Walters
Julie Walters
Julie Walters, CBE is an English actress and novelist. She came to international prominence in 1983 for Educating Rita, performing in the title role opposite Michael Caine. It was a role she had created on the West End stage and it won her BAFTA and Golden Globe awards for Best Actress...
, Celia Imrie
Celia Imrie
Celia Diana Savile Imrie is an English actress. In a career starting in the early 1970s, Imrie has played Marianne Bellshade in Bergerac, Philippa Moorcroft in Dinnerladies, Miss Babs in Acorn Antiques, Diana Neal in After You've Gone and Gloria Millington in Kingdom...
amongst others - Wood
Victoria Wood
Victoria Wood CBE is a British comedienne, actress, singer-songwriter, screenwriter and director. Wood has written and starred in sketches, plays, films and sitcoms, and her live stand-up comedy act is interspersed with her own compositions, which she accompanies on piano...
alternated with Julie Walters
Julie Walters
Julie Walters, CBE is an English actress and novelist. She came to international prominence in 1983 for Educating Rita, performing in the title role opposite Michael Caine. It was a role she had created on the West End stage and it won her BAFTA and Golden Globe awards for Best Actress...
in the role of Mrs Overall), which had a sellout season in the West End.
The show earned several Olivier Award nominations, and winning Best Supporting Actress in a Musical for Celia Imrie
Celia Imrie
Celia Diana Savile Imrie is an English actress. In a career starting in the early 1970s, Imrie has played Marianne Bellshade in Bergerac, Philippa Moorcroft in Dinnerladies, Miss Babs in Acorn Antiques, Diana Neal in After You've Gone and Gloria Millington in Kingdom...
. The original run was directed by Trevor Nunn
Trevor Nunn
Sir Trevor Robert Nunn, CBE is an English theatre, film and television director. Nunn has been the Artistic Director for the Royal Shakespeare Company, the Royal National Theatre, and, currently, the Theatre Royal, Haymarket. He has directed musicals and dramas for the stage, as well as opera...
. Standout songs included "Have You Met Miss Babs?" and "Macaroons".
It was revived on tour in 2007, directed by Victoria Wood
Victoria Wood
Victoria Wood CBE is a British comedienne, actress, singer-songwriter, screenwriter and director. Wood has written and starred in sketches, plays, films and sitcoms, and her live stand-up comedy act is interspersed with her own compositions, which she accompanies on piano...
.
Leighton Maqueraders in 2010 were the first amateur drama group to do the show in 2010. Acorn Antiques The Musical ran at Leighton Buzzard Library Theatre from June 16–19.
Leighton Masqueraders performed the comedy to a full house and the production impressed their star guest Victoria wood, writer of the musical.
Cast
- Miss Babs (Celia ImrieCelia ImrieCelia Diana Savile Imrie is an English actress. In a career starting in the early 1970s, Imrie has played Marianne Bellshade in Bergerac, Philippa Moorcroft in Dinnerladies, Miss Babs in Acorn Antiques, Diana Neal in After You've Gone and Gloria Millington in Kingdom...
): the overwrought and lovelorn owner of Acorn Antiques, who moves from one 'crisis' to another. Opens each episode on the phone introducing a never again mentioned plot line. Wife of Mr Kenneth, who was himself never seen on screen, mother of unnamed triplets afflicted with "dangerously straight hair" (and, we discover in one episode, Trixie Trouble). The triplets are kept amused by trips in the WolseleyWolseley Motor CompanyThe Wolseley Motor Company was a British automobile manufacturer founded in 1901. After 1935 it was incorporated into larger companies but the Wolseley name remained as an upmarket marque until 1975.-History:...
, Get CarterGet CarterGet Carter is a 1971 British crime film directed by Mike Hodges and starring Michael Caine as Jack Carter, a gangster who sets out to avenge the death of his brother in a series of unrelenting and brutal killings played out against the grim background of derelict urban housing in the city of...
at the cinema and bedtime stories by Simone de BeauvoirSimone de BeauvoirSimone-Ernestine-Lucie-Marie Bertrand de Beauvoir, often shortened to Simone de Beauvoir , was a French existentialist philosopher, public intellectual, and social theorist. She wrote novels, essays, biographies, an autobiography in several volumes, and monographs on philosophy, politics, and...
. Miss Babs' torrid romances are hinted at but never seen: Mr Clifford once abandoned her by the handbags in a well-known store. Distinguishing features include a birthmark shaped like a moped. Her humanitarian credentials are revealed when she allows Mrs Overall a couple of hours off to attend her husband's funeral, provided she pops back at five for the hoovering.
- Miss Berta (Victoria WoodVictoria WoodVictoria Wood CBE is a British comedienne, actress, singer-songwriter, screenwriter and director. Wood has written and starred in sketches, plays, films and sitcoms, and her live stand-up comedy act is interspersed with her own compositions, which she accompanies on piano...
): a partner in the business who begins the series emerging from intensive care to discover that her deceased father (believed murdered in DakarDakarDakar is the capital city and largest city of Senegal. It is located on the Cap-Vert Peninsula on the Atlantic coast and is the westernmost city on the African mainland...
) has been seen buying a padded envelope in the post office. She later develops amnesiaAmnesiaAmnesia is a condition in which one's memory is lost. The causes of amnesia have traditionally been divided into categories. Memory appears to be stored in several parts of the limbic system of the brain, and any condition that interferes with the function of this system can cause amnesia...
and gets married to Clifford (the Bishop of Manchesterford officiating) before discovering that she is not only the twin sister of Derek, but also the daughter of Mrs Overall, and the mother of an unnamed baby. In the musical version, Berta is revealed to be Babs's sister: both siblings are the daughters of Mrs Overall.
- Clifford (Duncan PrestonDuncan PrestonDuncan Preston is an English actor probably best known for his appearances in television productions written by Victoria Wood. His best remembered roles are Clifford in the Victoria Wood As Seen On TV soap opera parody Acorn Antiques , and Stan in dinnerladies.In July 2010, Preston revealed he was...
): the stolid, reliable leading man whose advances are rejected by Babs. Shortly afterward he reveals he has married Miss Berta who is suffering from amnesia. Mr Clifford's voice mirrors that of David Hunter, sometime shareholder of the Crossroads Motel. He has a jet-setting lifestyle: "Bored with ZurichZürichZurich is the largest city in Switzerland and the capital of the canton of Zurich. It is located in central Switzerland at the northwestern tip of Lake Zurich...
or did Zurich get bored with you?" asks Miss Babs. In the series he is electrocutedElectric shockElectric Shock of a body with any source of electricity that causes a sufficient current through the skin, muscles or hair. Typically, the expression is used to denote an unwanted exposure to electricity, hence the effects are considered undesirable....
whilst unplugging an iron. In the musical, it is revealed that Mr Clifford's father knew of the paternity of the triplets, since he had sheltered the pregnant Mrs Overall, one rainy night.
- Mrs Overall (Julie WaltersJulie WaltersJulie Walters, CBE is an English actress and novelist. She came to international prominence in 1983 for Educating Rita, performing in the title role opposite Michael Caine. It was a role she had created on the West End stage and it won her BAFTA and Golden Globe awards for Best Actress...
): the elderly tea lady, who believes all problems could be solved with a nice cup of tea, a macaroonMacaroonA macaroon is a type of light, baked confection, described as either small cakes or meringue-like cookies depending on their consistency. The original macaroon was a "small sweet cake consisting largely of ground almonds" similar to Italian or Moroccan amaretti.The English word macaroon and French...
and an anecdote. One of her many specialties is home-made sherrySherrySherry is a fortified wine made from white grapes that are grown near the town of Jerez , Spain. In Spanish, it is called vino de Jerez....
served in a mug. Her late husband referred to her as Boadicea. Asked why, she confesses, "He was barmy, Miss Babs". She is revealed to be the sole beneficiary of Berta's father's will, and mother of Miss Berta and Derek. The rather grand actress who "plays" Mrs Overall (Bo Beaumont) was a former lover of Lord Delfont. In the series she dies after choking on her own macaroon. According to Wood, the character of Mrs Overall was inspired by Mrs Mack in Take the High RoadTake the High RoadTake the High Road was a Scottish soap opera produced by Scottish Television, and set in the fictional village of Glendarroch , and claims to have about 2 million fans, including the Queen Mother...
(overall being a deliberate pun on mac) and Amy TurtleAmy TurtleAmy Turtle was a character in Crossroads, the British television soap opera, played by Ann George from 1965 to 1976 and again from 1987 to 1988....
in Crossroads (originally played by Ann GeorgeAnn GeorgeAnn George was a British actress best known for her role as Amy Turtle in the television soap opera Crossroads.-Early life and career:...
).
- Trixie (Rosie CollinsRosie CollinsRosie Collins, also known as Rose Collins, is a British actress.Collins played Amanda in two episodes of Dixon of Dock Green , she played Rosie in eight episodes of Justice in 1974...
): also known as Trixie Trouble, a feisty, tartTartA tart is a baked dish consisting of a filling over a pastry base with an open top not covered with pastry. The pastry is usually shortcrust pastry; the filling may be sweet or savoury, though modern tarts are usually fruit-based, sometimes with custard....
y femme fataleFemme fataleA femme fatale is a mysterious and seductive woman whose charms ensnare her lovers in bonds of irresistible desire, often leading them into compromising, dangerous, and deadly situations. She is an archetype of literature and art...
who works in the antiques packing department until she discovers she is Miss Babs' daughter. After her off-screen marriage to Bobby she mentions having had jaundiceJaundiceJaundice is a yellowish pigmentation of the skin, the conjunctival membranes over the sclerae , and other mucous membranes caused by hyperbilirubinemia . This hyperbilirubinemia subsequently causes increased levels of bilirubin in the extracellular fluid...
, 'lots of' extramarital relationships (which may have included Derek, with whom she was in a car crash), and is seduced by her mother's cousin Jerez, shortly before she briefly runs away to MoroccoMoroccoMorocco , officially the Kingdom of Morocco , is a country located in North Africa. It has a population of more than 32 million and an area of 710,850 km², and also primarily administers the disputed region of the Western Sahara...
with Derek. She also had a romantic interlude at the Formica Motel with Mr Kenneth, who gifted her a leotard and a wet-look bra. She returns to become a nun, and later a Mother SuperiorMother SuperiorA mother superior is an abbess or other nun in charge of a Christian religious order or congregation, a convent or house of women under vows.Mother superior may also refer to:*Mother Superior , a rock band who became ¾ of Rollins Band circa 2000...
.
- Derek (Kenny IrelandKenny IrelandKenny Ireland is a Scottish actor and theatre director, best known to television viewers as part of Victoria Wood's 'rep' company in the BBC series Victoria Wood As Seen On TV.-Career:...
): the handyman, and revealed latterly Miss Berta's twin brother and Mrs Overall's other child. A long running affair with Miss Babs is hinted at and is briefly rekindled when his unseen girlfriend Marie-Therese Francine Dubois runs off, but this is interrupted by Trixie, with whom he also seems to have a relationship. He and Trixie later announce that they are 'traveling overland to Morocco' to find Trixie some nice jumpsuitJumpsuitJumpsuit originally referred to the utilitarian one-piece garments used by parachuters/skydivers, but has come to be used as a common term for any one-piece garment with sleeves and legs.-Use:...
s. It is also mentioned that he and Clifford are secretly playing the accordionAccordionThe accordion is a box-shaped musical instrument of the bellows-driven free-reed aerophone family, sometimes referred to as a squeezebox. A person who plays the accordion is called an accordionist....
and the ukuleleUkuleleThe ukulele, ; from ; it is a subset of the guitar family of instruments, generally with four nylon or gut strings or four courses of strings....
together. Derek is based on the character Benny from Crossroads. Kenny Ireland says he is still remembered best for his regular part in As Seen On TV. "Twenty-odd years ago I played Derek the handyman in Acorn Antiques. To this day, nice camp waiters quote my dialogue at me, and are slightly disappointed that I don't remember any of the lines."
- Cousin Jerez (Peter EllisPeter Ellis (actor)Peter Ellis is a British actor. Peter has worked extensively in Theatre and Television both as an Actor and Director. He is perhaps best known for playing the role of Chief Superintendent Charles Brownlow in the long running ITV drama The Bill.In 1983, Peter appeared in the play Trafford Tanzi,...
): the foreign villain of the series, and previously unmentioned Spanish cousin of Miss Babs, who makes a rejected offer to buy the shop. Undaunted he disguises himself as a postman (whose signature whistle is the theme to Limelight) to misdirect mail which would have warned Babs of a new motorway to be built nearby. His plans are thwarted by Clifford but not before he has attempted to seduce Trixie. He later returns, completely reformed, while on his way to begin a sandwich course in computer studies at FuengirolaFuengirolaFuengirola, in ancient times known as Suel and then Suhayl, is a large town and municipality on the Costa del Sol in the province of Málaga, autonomous community of Andalusia in southern Spain. It is a major tourist resort, with more than 8 km of beaches, and home to a mediæval Moorish fortress...
Polytechnic, and gives Babs £25,000, thus conveniently solving a cash flow problem at the shop.
- Extras (Albert Welch & Michaela Welch): the only customers to appear in the entire series. An elderly couple who appear at the beginning of every episode, looking at an antique and leaving the shop.