Bryan Strauchan
Encyclopedia
Bryan Keith Strauchan better known as "Strauchanie", is a fictional Australian rules football
player, portrayed by Peter Helliar
, who first appeared during short sketches on Before the Game
.
Strauchanie is represented as a talentless, overweight bogan
, oblivious to his own lack of ability, who fictionally occupied a position on the Collingwood Football Club
's playing list, until he announced his retirement in early April 2009 on Triple M, where Helliar works. Helliar wears a recognisable blond mullet
wig in his portrayal of Strauchan.
Through his regular segment on Before the Game, Strauchanie became a popular character for his combination of country football stereotypes and jokes about contemporary issues in the AFL. Helliar has since made celebrity appearances in character as Strauchan, often performing in charity sports events.
. He is of Asian
descent through his maternal parentage, although his appearance shows no physical Asian traits.
He played his formative years of football in Horsham, reaching no higher than the reserves; nevertheless, he was selected by the Collingwood Football Club
with the last pick in the 2004 National Draft
. Strauchan's progress has been hampered by weight issues, lack of speed and skills that require considerable work. He wears guernsey #59, indicative of his mediocrity (AFL players seldom retain numbers higher than 40 longer than their junior years and almost never wear numbers higher than 50). He never made his AFL
debut, however former Collingwood Coach Mick Malthouse
had hinted that promotion may have be around the corner. Strauchan was purportedly named in the senior team for the Collingwood
vs. Sydney
game in 2005 but locked himself in the stairwell by accident, subsequently missing the game. He also has his own AFL
footy card which describes all of his mediocre abilities.
Strauchan has been involved in a fictional relationship with real-life boundary rider Christi Malthouse
, although incidences of infidelity are frequent. He suffers from a severe peanut allergy
. He has claimed that the reason he was not selected for play is that selectors are biased against Asians, but he was selected as Captain in the fictional Asian Team of the Century.
He was man of the match in the 2009 EJ Whitten Legend's Game after kicking three goals. Although late in the match Strauchan injured his ankle after a tackle (although it appeared to be a joke at first, Helliar did actually injure his ankle severely), putting the rest of his career in doubt.
Strauchan is a recurring character on the show Before the Game
, which features regular 2-5 minute segments about the goings-on in Strauchan's life. Collingwood Football Club personalities, including coach Mick Malthouse
, president Eddie McGuire
and various senior players, have appeared and co-operated with sketches which pretend to place Strauchan inside the real-life workings of the club.
Additionally, Peter Hellier has made celebrity appearances as Bryan Strauchan on several occasions in both the media and in sports. These include:
Real-Life Highlights
Helliar is releasing a Strauchan autobiography Bryan Strauchan - my story: the rise and rise of a genuine superstar of Australian sport. In it, Strauchan talks about his Horsham
days, playing for Collingwood, and being Chinese. Helliar, as Strauchan, released the autobiography in front of a packed media conference at Collingwood's
headquarters, the Lexus Centre
, with Nathan Buckley
helping promote it.
A DVD featuring all of Strauchan's mini clips was released in 2006 in Australia. This DVD is titled as "Strauchanie - Pure B.S.". This is a play on words, as the "B.S." in the title can refer both to Strauchan's initials and also to the word "bullshit
".
Australian rules football
Australian rules football, officially known as Australian football, also called football, Aussie rules or footy is a sport played between two teams of 22 players on either...
player, portrayed by Peter Helliar
Peter Helliar
Peter Jason Matthew Helliar is an Australian comedian, actor and writer. Most famous for his work on television as Rove McManus' sidekick on The Loft Live from 1997 to 1998 and on Rove from 1999 and 2009...
, who first appeared during short sketches on Before the Game
Before the Game
Before The Game is an Australian rules football/comedy television show in Australia on Network Ten. The show is hosted by Andrew Maher, with regular panelists including Mick Molloy, Dave Hughes, Sam Lane, and Lehmo. The format of the show is a light-hearted discussion of issues relating to the...
.
Strauchanie is represented as a talentless, overweight bogan
Bogan
The term bogan is Australian slang, usually pejorative or self-deprecating, for an individual who is recognised to be from a lower class background or someone whose limited education, speech, clothing, attitude and behaviour exemplifies such a background....
, oblivious to his own lack of ability, who fictionally occupied a position on the Collingwood Football Club
Collingwood Football Club
The Collingwood Football Club, nicknamed The Magpies, is an Australian rules football club which plays in the Australian Football League...
's playing list, until he announced his retirement in early April 2009 on Triple M, where Helliar works. Helliar wears a recognisable blond mullet
Mullet (haircut)
The mullet is a hairstyle that is short at the front and sides, and long in the back. . The mullet began to appear in popular media in the 1960s and 1970s but did not become generally well-known until the early 1980s...
wig in his portrayal of Strauchan.
Through his regular segment on Before the Game, Strauchanie became a popular character for his combination of country football stereotypes and jokes about contemporary issues in the AFL. Helliar has since made celebrity appearances in character as Strauchan, often performing in charity sports events.
Character
Bryan Strauchan was born in 1984 to Roy and Soy Bean Strauchan in the country town of Horsham, VictoriaHorsham, Victoria
Horsham is the largest city by population and regional centre of the Wimmera region of Victoria, Australia and is approximately north-west of Melbourne via the Western Highway. At the 2006 census, Horsham had a population of 14,125. Horsham is in the federal Division of Mallee...
. He is of Asian
Asian people
Asian people or Asiatic people is a term with multiple meanings that refers to people who descend from a portion of Asia's population.- Central Asia :...
descent through his maternal parentage, although his appearance shows no physical Asian traits.
He played his formative years of football in Horsham, reaching no higher than the reserves; nevertheless, he was selected by the Collingwood Football Club
Collingwood Football Club
The Collingwood Football Club, nicknamed The Magpies, is an Australian rules football club which plays in the Australian Football League...
with the last pick in the 2004 National Draft
2004 AFL Draft
The 2004 AFL Draft, concerning player acquisitions in the 2004/05 Australian Football League off-season, consisted of a trade period, a national draft, a pre-season draft, and the elevation of rookies...
. Strauchan's progress has been hampered by weight issues, lack of speed and skills that require considerable work. He wears guernsey #59, indicative of his mediocrity (AFL players seldom retain numbers higher than 40 longer than their junior years and almost never wear numbers higher than 50). He never made his AFL
Australian Football League
The Australian Football League is both the governing body and the major professional competition in the sport of Australian rules football...
debut, however former Collingwood Coach Mick Malthouse
Mick Malthouse
Michael "Mick" Malthouse is a former Australian rules footballer and the former coach of the Collingwood Football Club.While his playing career included a premiership for Richmond in the VFL, he is best known for his Australian Football League coaching career.Malthouse is the most successful coach...
had hinted that promotion may have be around the corner. Strauchan was purportedly named in the senior team for the Collingwood
Collingwood Football Club
The Collingwood Football Club, nicknamed The Magpies, is an Australian rules football club which plays in the Australian Football League...
vs. Sydney
Sydney Swans
The Sydney Swans Football Club is an Australian rules football club which plays in the Australian Football League . The club is based in Sydney, New South Wales. The club, founded in 1874, was known as the South Melbourne Football Club until it relocated to Sydney in 1982 to become the Sydney...
game in 2005 but locked himself in the stairwell by accident, subsequently missing the game. He also has his own AFL
Australian Football League
The Australian Football League is both the governing body and the major professional competition in the sport of Australian rules football...
footy card which describes all of his mediocre abilities.
Strauchan has been involved in a fictional relationship with real-life boundary rider Christi Malthouse
Christi Malthouse
Christi Malthouse is an Australian television personality.Malthouse was a journalist for Network Ten and is the daughter of Mick Malthouse, former Australian rules football player and former coach of the Collingwood Magpies...
, although incidences of infidelity are frequent. He suffers from a severe peanut allergy
Peanut allergy
Peanut allergy is a type of food allergy distinct from nut allergies. It is a type 1 hypersensitivity reaction to dietary substances from peanuts causing an overreaction of the immune system which in a small percentage of people may lead to severe physical symptoms. It is estimated to affect...
. He has claimed that the reason he was not selected for play is that selectors are biased against Asians, but he was selected as Captain in the fictional Asian Team of the Century.
He was man of the match in the 2009 EJ Whitten Legend's Game after kicking three goals. Although late in the match Strauchan injured his ankle after a tackle (although it appeared to be a joke at first, Helliar did actually injure his ankle severely), putting the rest of his career in doubt.
Media and celebrity appearances
Before the Game
Before The Game is an Australian rules football/comedy television show in Australia on Network Ten. The show is hosted by Andrew Maher, with regular panelists including Mick Molloy, Dave Hughes, Sam Lane, and Lehmo. The format of the show is a light-hearted discussion of issues relating to the...
, which features regular 2-5 minute segments about the goings-on in Strauchan's life. Collingwood Football Club personalities, including coach Mick Malthouse
Mick Malthouse
Michael "Mick" Malthouse is a former Australian rules footballer and the former coach of the Collingwood Football Club.While his playing career included a premiership for Richmond in the VFL, he is best known for his Australian Football League coaching career.Malthouse is the most successful coach...
, president Eddie McGuire
Eddie McGuire
Edward Joseph "Eddie" McGuire AM is an Australian television presenter and businessman known for his long association with Australian rules football and the Channel 9 television network....
and various senior players, have appeared and co-operated with sketches which pretend to place Strauchan inside the real-life workings of the club.
Additionally, Peter Hellier has made celebrity appearances as Bryan Strauchan on several occasions in both the media and in sports. These include:
- Hosting a comedy segment at the 2006 Brownlow Medal CountBrownlow MedalThe Chas Brownlow Trophy, better known as the Brownlow Medal , is awarded to the "fairest and best" player in the Australian Football League during the regular season as determined by votes cast by the officiating field umpires after each game...
. - Appearing in the Australian Football LeagueAustralian Football LeagueThe Australian Football League is both the governing body and the major professional competition in the sport of Australian rules football...
's membership advertisements. - Participating in the 2007 through 2011 EJ Whitten Legends Games for Victoria, as co-captain in 2008 (wearing his #59 guernsey).
- Participating in the Gillette Fusion Twenty20 Celebrity ChallengeTwenty20Twenty20 is a form of cricket, originally introduced in England for professional inter-county competition by the England and Wales Cricket Board , in 2003. A Twenty20 game involves two teams, each has a single innings, batting for a maximum of 20 overs. Twenty20 cricket is also known as T20 cricket...
, a charity cricket match played for the Shane Warne FoundationShane WarneShane Keith Warne is a former Australian international cricketer widely regarded as one of the greatest bowlers in the history of the game. In 2000, he was selected by a panel of cricket experts as one of the five Wisden Cricketers of the Century, the only specialist bowler selected in the quintet...
. - Participating in the 2008 Australian Grand Prix2008 Australian Grand PrixThe 2008 Australian Grand Prix was a Formula One motor race held on 16 March 2008 at the Melbourne Grand Prix Circuit, Melbourne, Australia. It was the first race of the 2008 Formula One season. The race, contested over 58 laps, was won by Lewis Hamilton for the McLaren team after...
Celebrity Race. - Appearing at Parade CollegeParade CollegeParade College, Bundoora, Victoria, is an Australian Roman Catholic all-lads high school, run under the auspices of the Congregation of Christian Brothers.The school was founded by four Christian Brothers in January 1871...
for a fundraiser on the 5 November 2009.
Career highlights
Fictional Highlights- Final Pick National Draft 2004
- Captain of All-Asian Team of the Century
Real-Life Highlights
- E. J. Whitten Legends GameE. J. Whitten Legends GameThe E. J. Whitten Legends Game is an annual charity Australian rules football All-star game, where retired star players are reunited, along with selected non-footballing celebrities, in a State of Origin interstate game, between Victoria and the All Stars .-History:E. J...
2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011 - Co-Captain of VictoriaVictoria (Australia)Victoria is the second most populous state in Australia. Geographically the smallest mainland state, Victoria is bordered by New South Wales, South Australia, and Tasmania on Boundary Islet to the north, west and south respectively....
(EJ Whitten Legends Game) (2008) - Man of the Match (EJ Whitten Legends Game) (2009)
Merchandise
Horsham
Horsham is a market town with a population of 55,657 on the upper reaches of the River Arun in the centre of the Weald, West Sussex, in the historic County of Sussex, England. The town is south south-west of London, north-west of Brighton and north-east of the county town of Chichester...
days, playing for Collingwood, and being Chinese. Helliar, as Strauchan, released the autobiography in front of a packed media conference at Collingwood's
Collingwood Football Club
The Collingwood Football Club, nicknamed The Magpies, is an Australian rules football club which plays in the Australian Football League...
headquarters, the Lexus Centre
Lexus Centre
The Melbourne Sports and Entertainment Centre is the indoor training and administration centre for the Collingwood Football Club of the AFL and the Victorian Institute of Sport located in Melbourne, Australia....
, with Nathan Buckley
Nathan Buckley
Nathan Charles Buckley is a former professional Australian rules football player, commentator and coach, best known for his time as captain of the Collingwood Football Club in the Australian Football League ....
helping promote it.
A DVD featuring all of Strauchan's mini clips was released in 2006 in Australia. This DVD is titled as "Strauchanie - Pure B.S.". This is a play on words, as the "B.S." in the title can refer both to Strauchan's initials and also to the word "bullshit
Bullshit
Bullshit is a common English expletive which may be shortened to the euphemism bull or the initialism B.S. In British English, "bollocks" is a comparable expletive, although bullshit is commonly used in British English...
".
Further reading
- Helliar, Peter and Paul Calleja. Bryan Strauchan: My story : The rise and rise of a genuine superstar of Australian sport. Sydney: Allen & Unwin, 2007. ISBN 9781741753431