Mean Machine
Encyclopedia
Mean Machine is a 2001 British comedy-drama film directed by Barry Skolnick. It stars former footballer Vinnie Jones
. The film is an adaptation of the 1974 American film The Longest Yard, featuring association football rather than American football
. It also reunites most of the cast who have starred in the Guy Ritchie
blockbusters Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels
and Snatch
.
and Germany
, is sentenced to three years in Longmarsh prison for assaulting two police officer
s after a lengthy drinking session and driving wildly to a local bar.
Once inside, he is promptly beaten by the prison guards for misbehaving, and is subsequently approached by the prison governor. The governor offers Meehan a job as coach of the prison wardens' football team; not wanting to make enemies with the other prisoners, Meehan declines, and instead offers to train a team consisting of other inmates, who will take on the wardens in a practice match.
Meehan ends up with the resident contraband dealer, Massive, as his right-hand man. He also receives advice from an elderly convict, Doc, who teaches Meehan prison lore. Meehan wins the respect of the other inmates after he attacks an officer, Mr. Ratchett, who is attacking Massive, and is then occupied with the task of training up his team of cons, including a maximum-security con named Monk (Jason Statham
) a violent Scottish inmate.
At half time, the inmates' team, Mean Machine is winning 1-0, and things are going well until the governor attempts to blackmail
Meehan into throwing the match. At first he puts his own interests before that of the team's, playing quite badly but as the final moments of the game tick down, he redeems himself, and uses a square-ball to fellow inmate 'Billy the Limpet'(Danny Dyer
) to win the game for the cons.
The film also included a number of actors who had formerly played professional football. Charlie Hartfield
, who played for Sheffield United
and Swansea City, and Nevin Saroya
, a former youth team player at Brentford
, appeared for the prisoners' team. Footballers on the guards' team included Paul Fishenden and Brian Gayle
, who both played for Wimbledon
.
, and the match was filmed at The Warren, the former home ground of Yeading
.
Vinnie Jones
Vincent Peter "Vinnie" Jones is an English film actor and retired Welsh footballer.Born in Hertfordshire, England, Jones represented and captained the Welsh national football team, having qualified via a Welsh grandparent. He also previously played for Chelsea and Leeds United. As a member of the...
. The film is an adaptation of the 1974 American film The Longest Yard, featuring association football rather than American football
American football
American football is a sport played between two teams of eleven with the objective of scoring points by advancing the ball into the opposing team's end zone. Known in the United States simply as football, it may also be referred to informally as gridiron football. The ball can be advanced by...
. It also reunites most of the cast who have starred in the Guy Ritchie
Guy Ritchie
Guy Stuart Ritchie is an English screenwriter and film maker who directed Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, Snatch, Revolver, RocknRolla and Sherlock Holmes.-Early life:...
blockbusters Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels
Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels
Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels is a 1998 British crime film directed and written by Guy Ritchie. The story is a heist film involving a self-confident young card sharp who loses £500,000 to a powerful crime lord in a rigged game of three card brag...
and Snatch
Snatch (film)
Snatch is a 2000 crime film written and directed by British filmmaker Guy Ritchie, featuring an ensemble cast. Set in the London criminal underworld, the film contains two intertwined plots: one dealing with the search for a stolen diamond, the other with a small-time boxing promoter named Turkish ...
.
Plot
Danny Meehan, a former captain of the English national football team who was banned from football for life for fixing a match between EnglandEngland national football team
The England national football team represents England in association football and is controlled by the Football Association, the governing body for football in England. England is the joint oldest national football team in the world, alongside Scotland, whom they played in the world's first...
and Germany
Germany national football team
The Germany national football team is the football team that has represented Germany in international competition since 1908. It is governed by the German Football Association , which was founded in 1900....
, is sentenced to three years in Longmarsh prison for assaulting two police officer
Police officer
A police officer is a warranted employee of a police force...
s after a lengthy drinking session and driving wildly to a local bar.
Once inside, he is promptly beaten by the prison guards for misbehaving, and is subsequently approached by the prison governor. The governor offers Meehan a job as coach of the prison wardens' football team; not wanting to make enemies with the other prisoners, Meehan declines, and instead offers to train a team consisting of other inmates, who will take on the wardens in a practice match.
Meehan ends up with the resident contraband dealer, Massive, as his right-hand man. He also receives advice from an elderly convict, Doc, who teaches Meehan prison lore. Meehan wins the respect of the other inmates after he attacks an officer, Mr. Ratchett, who is attacking Massive, and is then occupied with the task of training up his team of cons, including a maximum-security con named Monk (Jason Statham
Jason Statham
Jason Statham born 12 September1967) is an English actor and former diver, known for his roles in the Guy Ritchie crime films Revolver, Snatch and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels...
) a violent Scottish inmate.
At half time, the inmates' team, Mean Machine is winning 1-0, and things are going well until the governor attempts to blackmail
Blackmail
In common usage, blackmail is a crime involving threats to reveal substantially true or false information about a person to the public, a family member, or associates unless a demand is met. It may be defined as coercion involving threats of physical harm, threat of criminal prosecution, or threats...
Meehan into throwing the match. At first he puts his own interests before that of the team's, playing quite badly but as the final moments of the game tick down, he redeems himself, and uses a square-ball to fellow inmate 'Billy the Limpet'(Danny Dyer
Danny Dyer
Danny Dyer is an English actor, media personality, and chairman of Greenwich Borough, a non-League football team.-Biography:Daniel John Dyer was born in Custom House, an area of East London, to Antony and Christine Dyer...
) to win the game for the cons.
Cast
- Vinnie JonesVinnie JonesVincent Peter "Vinnie" Jones is an English film actor and retired Welsh footballer.Born in Hertfordshire, England, Jones represented and captained the Welsh national football team, having qualified via a Welsh grandparent. He also previously played for Chelsea and Leeds United. As a member of the...
as Danny Meehan - Jason StathamJason StathamJason Statham born 12 September1967) is an English actor and former diver, known for his roles in the Guy Ritchie crime films Revolver, Snatch and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels...
as Monk - Jamie SivesJamie Sives-Filmography:-External links:...
as Chiv - Danny DyerDanny DyerDanny Dyer is an English actor, media personality, and chairman of Greenwich Borough, a non-League football team.-Biography:Daniel John Dyer was born in Custom House, an area of East London, to Antony and Christine Dyer...
as Billy the Limpet - Stephen Martin WaltersStephen Martin WaltersStephen Martin Walters is a British born actor best known for his film roles as Blowfish in The 51st State, Nitro in Mean Machine, Shanks in Layer Cake, Arkham Lunatic in Batman Begins, Joe in Revolver, and Milko in Hannibal Rising. He also plays a barman in East is East...
as Nitro - Rocky MarshallRocky MarshallRocky Marshall is a British television and film actor, living near Battersea park.-Biography:He has starred in mainstream movies such as Mr Right, Hart's War, Re-Kill and Mean Machine...
as Cigs - Adam FogertyAdam FogertyAdam Heywood Fogerty is an English boxer, rugby league player, and actor.-Career:Fogerty was born in Oldham, Lancashire. Fogerty's boxing career saw him facing a number of relatively underskilled opponents. He twice faced Paul Lister, with their first meeting in 1989 handing Fogerty his first and...
as Mouse - David KellyDavid Kelly (actor)David Kelly is an Irish actor, who has been in regular film and television work since the 1950s.-Acting career:Playing everything from Beckett to Shakespeare, he has appeared in Theatre, TV and film constantly since 1959...
as Doctor - David HemmingsDavid HemmingsDavid Edward Leslie Hemmings was an English film, theatre and television actor as well as a film and television director and producer....
as Governor - Ralph BrownRalph BrownRalph William John Brown is an English actor and writer, known for playing Danny the drug dealer in Withnail and I, the security guard Aaron in Alien 3, DJ Bob Silver in The Boat That Rocked, and the pilot Ric Olié in Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace...
as Burton - Vas BlackwoodVas BlackwoodVasta Blackwood is a British television and film actor.Blackwood played Lenny Henry's sidekick Winston Churchill in The Lenny Henry Show and David Sinclair in Casualty...
as Massive - Robbie GeeRobbie GeeRobbie Gee is a British actor, best known for his Desmond's character "Lee Stanley", and for appearing in Guy Ritchie's crime caper Snatch. He also appeared in the movie Mean Machine playing "Trojan".-Hosting:...
as Trojan - Geoff BellGeoff Bell (actor)Geoff Bell is an English actor.-Career:He has appeared in many films, mostly as a cameo appearance or as a supporting role.He has appeared in Girl with a Pearl Earring, Stardust, The Long Firm, Making Waves, The Business and RocknRolla.One of his most well-known films is Green Street, where he...
as Ratchett - John ForgehamJohn ForgehamJohn Forgeham is a British actor who is probably best known for playing businessman Frank Laslett in the ITV series Footballers' Wives....
as Sykes - Sally PhillipsSally Phillips-Career:Sally Phillips was the only woman in the 1990 Oxford Revue THRASH which also starred Ed Smith. She did nine consecutive Edinburgh Festivals, appearing in shows such as Ra-Ra-Rasputin, Arthur Smith's version of Hamlet and Cluub Zarathustra with Simon Munnery, Stewart Lee, Richard Thomas,...
as Tracey - Jason FlemyngJason FlemyngJason Iain Flemyng is an English actor. He is known for his film work, which has included roles in British films such as Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch , both for Guy Ritchie, as well as Hollywood productions such as Rob Roy along with the Alan Moore comic book adaptations From...
as Bob Likely - Martin Wimbush as Z
- David ReidDavid Reid (footballer)David Reid was a Scottish footballer who played for Hibernian. He finished as the top scorer in the Scottish Football League Division One in the 1902–03 season, scoring 14 goals.-References:...
as Barman - David Cropman as Second Barman
- Omid DjaliliOmid DjaliliOmid Djalili is a British Iranian stand-up comedian, actor, television producer and writer.-Personal life:Djalili was born in Chelsea, London to Iranian Bahá'í parents and is a Bahá'í himself...
as Raj - J. J. ConnollyJ. J. ConnollyJ.J. Connolly is the writer of the crime novel, Layer Cake, and of the screenplay of the film based on it.Connolly has recently finished the sequel to Layer Cake entitled Viva La Madness. Only two characters remain from Layer Cake, the unnamed narrator and his partner in crime, Mister Mortimer, AKA...
as Barry The Bookie - Stephen Bent as Referee
The film also included a number of actors who had formerly played professional football. Charlie Hartfield
Charlie Hartfield
Charlie Hartfield is a retired English football midfielder.He started out at Arsenal, turning professional in 1989, but never made a first-team appearance...
, who played for Sheffield United
Sheffield United F.C.
Sheffield United Football Club is a professional English football club based in the city of Sheffield, South Yorkshire.They were the first sporting team to use the name 'United' and are nicknamed 'The Blades', thanks to Sheffield's worldwide reputation for steel production...
and Swansea City, and Nevin Saroya
Nevin Saroya
Nevin Saroya is an English semi-professional footballer, who plays as a central defender for Conference South club [Maidenhead United F.C.|Maidenhead United]]....
, a former youth team player at Brentford
Brentford F.C.
Brentford Football Club are a professional English football club based in Brentford in the London Borough of Hounslow. They are currently playing in Football League One....
, appeared for the prisoners' team. Footballers on the guards' team included Paul Fishenden and Brian Gayle
Brian Gayle
Brian Gayle is a retired English football defender. As a player he helped Wimbledon to the 1988 FA Cup Final where they achieved a shock 1-0 win over Liverpool...
, who both played for Wimbledon
Wimbledon F.C.
Wimbledon Football Club was an English professional association football club from Wimbledon, south-west London. Founded in 1889 as Wimbledon Old Central Football Club, the club spent most of its history in amateur and semi-professional non-League football before being elected to the Football...
.
Production
Mean Machine was filmed from April to June 2001. Most of the prison scenes were filmed at HM Prison OxfordOxford Castle
Oxford Castle is a large, partly ruined Norman medieval castle situated on the west edge of Oxford in Oxfordshire, England. The original moated, wooden motte and bailey castle was replaced with stone in the 11th century and played an important role in the conflict of the Anarchy...
, and the match was filmed at The Warren, the former home ground of Yeading
Yeading F.C.
Yeading F.C. were an English football club from Yeading in the London Borough of Hillingdon, West London.-Club history:Their roots trace to a youth club formed in Yeading in 1960. However, there was a Victorian amateur team by the same name which folded in the 1920s, so the club's history can be...
.