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Money (Blackadder)
Encyclopedia
"Money" is the fourth episode of the BBC
sitcom Blackadder II
, the second series of Blackadder
, which was set in Elizabethan England
from 1558 to 1603.
and a cheap prostitute named Molly are disturbed at four in the morning by the baby-eating Bishop of Bath and Wells
, who has come to collect on a loan
of one thousand pounds that Blackadder had taken out a year before from the Black Monks of St. Herod. When Blackadder admits that he cannot pay, the Bishop takes him to a graveyard, where they visit the grave of a previous customer who "died in agony with a spike up his bottom". The Bishop informs Blackadder that he has until sundown to raise the money, or he will meet a similar fate.
Since Blackadder only has 85 pounds to his name, he has to work quickly to get some more money. Unfortunately, he is interrupted by a summons from the Queen
. After cracking a ridiculously juvenile joke at his expense, the Queen forces Blackadder to pay up on her bet with Lord Melchett that Blackadder wouldn't fall for it. The bet is for 85 pounds, and Blackadder is left penniless - although due to what he calls "a cunning web of deceit", the entire court believe him to be incredibly rich.
Upon Blackadder's return home, Baldrick
develops a cunning plan that Blackadder become a rent boy down at the docks. Blackadder is desperate for the money, but dresses Baldrick in women's clothing and takes him to the docks where they encounter a fat and immature sailor who pays them sixpence for a kiss (from Blackadder), a goodnight story (Blackadder again) and a "good, hard shag" (from Baldrick). After Baldrick suggests that they bet the money on a cock fight after entering a bird that has odds of 40,000 to one, Blackadder is again summoned to the Queen, who pretends to apologise for her previous infantile joke. The apology is of course just another joke, and Blackadder is quickly relieved of his sixpence so that the Queen can play a game of shove ha'penny
. While Blackadder is at the palace, Lord Percy
utilises Blackadder's living room to attempt to discover the secret of alchemy
and thus restore Blackadder's fortunes. Unfortunately all he ends up producing is a terrible smell and a lump of a green glowing substance (aptly named by Blackadder as 'green,') which Percy plans to make it into jewellery.
Returning home once more, Blackadder determines that he must sell his house, and puts it on the market. He manages to sell it to a couple on the strength of the lack of indoor lavatories, and Baldrick beats the husband up until he agrees to pay £1100.
In this apparent moment of triumph, the Queen again summons Edmund to the palace, where she claims that the French
intend to invade and that every noble must pay 500 pounds for the upkeep of the navies. Unfortunately for Blackadder, Lord Melchett is also penniless, and the Queen declares that since Edmund is "so fabulously wealthy", he can pay double to compensate. Blackadder protests that he has a cash flow problem, but the Queen notices his bulging purse containing just over a thousand pounds. As soon as he leaves it is revealed to be yet another practical joke at Blackadder's expense, although it doesn't occur to the Queen to return the money afterwards. Upon returning home Blackadder is faced with the imminent prospect of death, as he now has no money and will shortly have no house.
Blackadder tells Baldrick he lost the money and decides to run away, until Baldrick points out the Black Bank has branches everywhere and will find him no matter where he flees. Blackadder, finally accepting his fate, asks Baldrick if people would remember him if he dies. Baldrick replies they will indeed: they'll laugh, slap each other on the shoulders, and say, "you remember old privy breath?" Blackadder enquires and learns that 'privy-breath' is a nickname used by people who like him: others say "Whoops, I've trod on an Edmund!" when they stand in dog droppings.
Outraged that he is a laughing stock, Blackadder comes up with a cunning plan, and sends Baldrick out to obtain a number of items including a sleeping draught and the finest portrait painter in England. Baldrick returns with the painter, Leonardo Acropolis, who hides in the bedroom while the Bishop arrives. The Bishop arrives and prepares to kill Blackadder, but drinks the sleeping draught mixed with wine which Baldrick gives him and falls unconscious.
When he awakens, he is presented with a painting of himself in a hugely compromising position with another figure who turns out to be Lord Percy, dressed in a pink leather tutu. Blackadder uses this painting (and the preliminary sketches Acropolis made while completing it) to blackmail
the Bishop into writing off his debt and giving him enough money to buy back his house and live in comfort once again. The Bishop is impressed with the depths of Blackadder's treachery, and asks him if he has ever considered a career in the Church. Blackadder replies that he could never get used to the underwear.
BBC
The British Broadcasting Corporation is a British public service broadcaster. Its headquarters is at Broadcasting House in the City of Westminster, London. It is the largest broadcaster in the world, with about 23,000 staff...
sitcom Blackadder II
Blackadder II
Blackadder II is the second series of the BBC situation comedy Blackadder, written by Richard Curtis and Ben Elton, which aired from 9 January 1986 to 20 February 1986...
, the second series of Blackadder
Blackadder
Blackadder is the name that encompassed four series of a BBC1 historical sitcom, along with several one-off instalments. All television programme episodes starred Rowan Atkinson as anti-hero Edmund Blackadder and Tony Robinson as Blackadder's dogsbody, Baldrick...
, which was set in Elizabethan England
Elizabethan era
The Elizabethan era was the epoch in English history of Queen Elizabeth I's reign . Historians often depict it as the golden age in English history...
from 1558 to 1603.
Plot
BlackadderLord Blackadder
Edmund Blackadder, Lord Blackadder is the main character in the second series of the popular BBC sitcom Blackadder. He is played by Rowan Atkinson.The second series is set in Elizabethan England, and Edmund is a courtier to Queen Elizabeth I...
and a cheap prostitute named Molly are disturbed at four in the morning by the baby-eating Bishop of Bath and Wells
Bishop of Bath and Wells
The Bishop of Bath and Wells heads the Church of England Diocese of Bath and Wells in the Province of Canterbury in England.The present diocese covers the vast majority of the county of Somerset and a small area of Dorset. The Episcopal seat is located in the Cathedral Church of Saint Andrew in...
, who has come to collect on a loan
Loan
A loan is a type of debt. Like all debt instruments, a loan entails the redistribution of financial assets over time, between the lender and the borrower....
of one thousand pounds that Blackadder had taken out a year before from the Black Monks of St. Herod. When Blackadder admits that he cannot pay, the Bishop takes him to a graveyard, where they visit the grave of a previous customer who "died in agony with a spike up his bottom". The Bishop informs Blackadder that he has until sundown to raise the money, or he will meet a similar fate.
Since Blackadder only has 85 pounds to his name, he has to work quickly to get some more money. Unfortunately, he is interrupted by a summons from the Queen
Queenie
"Queenie" is a caricature of the historical figure Queen Elizabeth I of England, played by Miranda Richardson in Blackadder II, the second series of the BBC historical sitcom Blackadder, which was set in Elizabethan England...
. After cracking a ridiculously juvenile joke at his expense, the Queen forces Blackadder to pay up on her bet with Lord Melchett that Blackadder wouldn't fall for it. The bet is for 85 pounds, and Blackadder is left penniless - although due to what he calls "a cunning web of deceit", the entire court believe him to be incredibly rich.
Upon Blackadder's return home, Baldrick
Baldrick
Baldrick is the name of several fictional characters featured in the long-running BBC historic comedy television series Blackadder. Each one serves as Edmund Blackadder's servant and sidekick and acts as a foil to the lead character...
develops a cunning plan that Blackadder become a rent boy down at the docks. Blackadder is desperate for the money, but dresses Baldrick in women's clothing and takes him to the docks where they encounter a fat and immature sailor who pays them sixpence for a kiss (from Blackadder), a goodnight story (Blackadder again) and a "good, hard shag" (from Baldrick). After Baldrick suggests that they bet the money on a cock fight after entering a bird that has odds of 40,000 to one, Blackadder is again summoned to the Queen, who pretends to apologise for her previous infantile joke. The apology is of course just another joke, and Blackadder is quickly relieved of his sixpence so that the Queen can play a game of shove ha'penny
Shove ha'penny
Shove ha'penny , also known in ancestral form as shoffe-grote ['shove-groat' in Modern English], slype groat ['slip groat'], and slide-thrift, is a pub game in the shuffleboard family, played predominantly in the United Kingdom...
. While Blackadder is at the palace, Lord Percy
Lord Percy Percy
Lord Percy Percy is the name given to a pair of related fictional characters, played by Tim McInnerny, in the first two series of the popular British sitcom Blackadder. The Lord Percy of Blackadder II is the descendant of that seen in The Black Adder...
utilises Blackadder's living room to attempt to discover the secret of alchemy
Alchemy
Alchemy is an influential philosophical tradition whose early practitioners’ claims to profound powers were known from antiquity. The defining objectives of alchemy are varied; these include the creation of the fabled philosopher's stone possessing powers including the capability of turning base...
and thus restore Blackadder's fortunes. Unfortunately all he ends up producing is a terrible smell and a lump of a green glowing substance (aptly named by Blackadder as 'green,') which Percy plans to make it into jewellery.
Returning home once more, Blackadder determines that he must sell his house, and puts it on the market. He manages to sell it to a couple on the strength of the lack of indoor lavatories, and Baldrick beats the husband up until he agrees to pay £1100.
In this apparent moment of triumph, the Queen again summons Edmund to the palace, where she claims that the French
France
The French Republic , The French Republic , The French Republic , (commonly known as France , is a unitary semi-presidential republic in Western Europe with several overseas territories and islands located on other continents and in the Indian, Pacific, and Atlantic oceans. Metropolitan France...
intend to invade and that every noble must pay 500 pounds for the upkeep of the navies. Unfortunately for Blackadder, Lord Melchett is also penniless, and the Queen declares that since Edmund is "so fabulously wealthy", he can pay double to compensate. Blackadder protests that he has a cash flow problem, but the Queen notices his bulging purse containing just over a thousand pounds. As soon as he leaves it is revealed to be yet another practical joke at Blackadder's expense, although it doesn't occur to the Queen to return the money afterwards. Upon returning home Blackadder is faced with the imminent prospect of death, as he now has no money and will shortly have no house.
Blackadder tells Baldrick he lost the money and decides to run away, until Baldrick points out the Black Bank has branches everywhere and will find him no matter where he flees. Blackadder, finally accepting his fate, asks Baldrick if people would remember him if he dies. Baldrick replies they will indeed: they'll laugh, slap each other on the shoulders, and say, "you remember old privy breath?" Blackadder enquires and learns that 'privy-breath' is a nickname used by people who like him: others say "Whoops, I've trod on an Edmund!" when they stand in dog droppings.
Outraged that he is a laughing stock, Blackadder comes up with a cunning plan, and sends Baldrick out to obtain a number of items including a sleeping draught and the finest portrait painter in England. Baldrick returns with the painter, Leonardo Acropolis, who hides in the bedroom while the Bishop arrives. The Bishop arrives and prepares to kill Blackadder, but drinks the sleeping draught mixed with wine which Baldrick gives him and falls unconscious.
When he awakens, he is presented with a painting of himself in a hugely compromising position with another figure who turns out to be Lord Percy, dressed in a pink leather tutu. Blackadder uses this painting (and the preliminary sketches Acropolis made while completing it) to blackmail
Blackmail
In common usage, blackmail is a crime involving threats to reveal substantially true or false information about a person to the public, a family member, or associates unless a demand is met. It may be defined as coercion involving threats of physical harm, threat of criminal prosecution, or threats...
the Bishop into writing off his debt and giving him enough money to buy back his house and live in comfort once again. The Bishop is impressed with the depths of Blackadder's treachery, and asks him if he has ever considered a career in the Church. Blackadder replies that he could never get used to the underwear.
Cast
- Rowan AtkinsonRowan AtkinsonRowan Sebastian Atkinson is a British actor, comedian, and screenwriter. He is most famous for his work on the satirical sketch comedy show Not The Nine O'Clock News, and the sitcoms Blackadder, Mr. Bean and The Thin Blue Line...
as Lord Edmund Blackadder - Tim McInnernyTim McInnernyTim McInnerny is an English actor. He is known for his role as Percy in Blackadder and Blackadder II, and as Captain Darling in Blackadder Goes Forth...
as Lord Percy PercyLord Percy PercyLord Percy Percy is the name given to a pair of related fictional characters, played by Tim McInnerny, in the first two series of the popular British sitcom Blackadder. The Lord Percy of Blackadder II is the descendant of that seen in The Black Adder... - Tony RobinsonTony RobinsonTony Robinson is an English actor, comedian, author, broadcaster and political campaigner. He is best known for playing Baldrick in the BBC television series Blackadder, and for hosting Channel 4 programmes such as Time Team and The Worst Jobs in History. Robinson is a member of the Labour Party...
as BaldrickBaldrickBaldrick is the name of several fictional characters featured in the long-running BBC historic comedy television series Blackadder. Each one serves as Edmund Blackadder's servant and sidekick and acts as a foil to the lead character... - Miranda RichardsonMiranda RichardsonMiranda Jane Richardson is an English stage, film and television actor. She has been nominated for two Academy Awards, and has won two Golden Globes and a BAFTA during her career....
as Queen Elizabeth IQueenie"Queenie" is a caricature of the historical figure Queen Elizabeth I of England, played by Miranda Richardson in Blackadder II, the second series of the BBC historical sitcom Blackadder, which was set in Elizabethan England... - Stephen FryStephen FryStephen John Fry is an English actor, screenwriter, author, playwright, journalist, poet, comedian, television presenter and film director, and a director of Norwich City Football Club. He first came to attention in the 1981 Cambridge Footlights Revue presentation "The Cellar Tapes", which also...
as Lord MelchettMelchettMelchett is a family line of fictional characters appearing in the British television sitcom series Blackadder, played by Stephen Fry. There were two main Melchetts: Lord Melchett and General Melchett.- Blackadder II :... - Patsy ByrnePatsy ByrnePatsy Byrne is an English actress.-Biography:She was educated at Ashford School for Girls, and attended the school around the same time as Lorna Fendall, and Joanna Brough, daughter of Arthur Brough...
as NursieNursieNursie is a fictional character in the second series of the popular BBC sitcom Blackadder II. She was played by Patsy Byrne and appeared in all six episodes. She also appeared in two of the Blackadder specials; Blackadder's Christmas Carol and Blackadder: Back & Forth... - Ronald LaceyRonald LaceyRonald Lacey was an English actor. He made numerous television and film appearances over a 30 year period and is perhaps best remembered for his villainous roles in Hollywood films, most famously Major Arnold Toht in Raiders of the Lost Ark.-Career:Lacey attended Harrow Weald Grammar School and...
as Bishop of Bath & Wells - Cassie Stuart as Mollie
- Lesley NicolLesley Nicol (actress)Lesley Nicol is a British actor who is most notable for her role as Mrs Beaver in the 1988 BBC adaptation of The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe and as the Queen Giant in the 1990 adaptation of The Silver Chair....
as Mrs. Pants - John Pierce Jones as Arthur the Sailor
- Tony AitkenTony AitkenTony Aitken is an English actor, known for playing small parts in popular television programmes....
as the Mad Beggar - Philip PopePhilip PopePhilip R. J. Pope is a British composer and actor. He was educated at Downside School and New College, Oxford.-Performer:He appeared in the Oxford Revue in Edinburgh Festival Fringe in 1978 and 1979, both with Angus Deayton...
as Leonardo Acropolis - Piers Ibbotson as the Messenger
- Barry Craine as Mr. Pants