Nurturant parent model
Encyclopedia
The nurturant parent model is a parenting style
which envisions a family model where children are expected to explore their surroundings with protection from their parents. This model believes that children inherently know what they need and should be allowed to explore. The parents are responsible for protecting their child during this exploration, including protecting their child from themselves by offering guidance. A child will be picked up if the child cries because the parent wants the child to feel safe and nurtured. If a child grows up believing that its needs will be met, it will be more confident when facing challenges.
Ideas involved in this model include:
This model is based on a study conducted by the Boston College Graduate Program in Human Development, when researchers were investigating the kinds of parenting done by the parents of extraordinarily creative children. The three kinds of parenting are typically cited when discussing parenting styles: "Authoritarian" ("do as I say or else"), "Laissez Faire" ("do anything you want") and "Authoritative" ("here are the boundaries/rules, act within them and you'll be okay, but act outside of them and there will be consequences"). In most parenting books the "authoritative" style is what is recommended. These researchers discovered a fourth style of parenting that they called "the nurturing parent." This style focuses on responsibility, empathy, and creativity. The basic parenting approach that these parents took included:
1) Trusting in their children's fairness and good judgment.
2) Respecting their children's autonomy, thoughts, and feelings.
3) Supporting their children's interests and goals.
4) Enjoying their children's company.
5) Protecting their children from doing injury to self or others, not by establishing rules, but by communicating values, and discussing their children's behavior with them.
6) Modeling the self-control, sensitivity, and values they believe their children will need
There is an acronym for this type of type of discipline, "RECEPEE". In a book-in-process, Caring Parents: a Guide to Successful Parenting, by Clinical Social Worker Herbert Jay Rosenfield, LCSW, he encourages "Reasonable Expectations, Clearly Expressed, Performed Everyday, and by Example".
The nurturant parent model is discussed by George Lakoff
in his books, including Moral Politics
and Whose Freedom? In these books, the nurturant parent model is contrasted with the strict father model
. Lakoff argues that if the metaphor of nation as family and government as parent is used, then progressive
politics correspond to the nurturant parent model. For example, progressives want the government to make sure that the citizens are protected and assisted to achieve their potential. This might take the form of tough environmental regulations or healthcare assistance.
The model is also consistent with Slow parenting
, in that children are encouraged to explore the world for themselves. They have to learn to face the risks that nature presents. Although Slow parenting
might go further and reduce the level of protection offered by parents, it would not advocate withholding it entirely.
Reverend George Englehardt stated succinctly, in 1991, that "parental responsibility is to provide their children with a 'safe, loving, nurturing environment'".
Parenting styles
A parenting style is a psychological construct representing standard strategies that parents use in their child rearing. There are many differing theories and opinions on the best ways to rear children, as well as differing levels of time and effort that parents are willing to invest.Many parents...
which envisions a family model where children are expected to explore their surroundings with protection from their parents. This model believes that children inherently know what they need and should be allowed to explore. The parents are responsible for protecting their child during this exploration, including protecting their child from themselves by offering guidance. A child will be picked up if the child cries because the parent wants the child to feel safe and nurtured. If a child grows up believing that its needs will be met, it will be more confident when facing challenges.
Ideas involved in this model include:
- True discipline is not a matter of strict obedience, but of respectRespectRespect denotes both a positive feeling of esteem for a person or other entity , and also specific actions and conduct representative of that esteem. Respect can be a specific feeling of regard for the actual qualities of the one respected...
and compassionCompassionCompassion is a virtue — one in which the emotional capacities of empathy and sympathy are regarded as a part of love itself, and a cornerstone of greater social interconnection and humanism — foundational to the highest principles in philosophy, society, and personhood.There is an aspect of...
. - The world is no more inherently hostile than it is inherently friendly; it merely commands respect.
- Respect and compassion can only be taught by example.
This model is based on a study conducted by the Boston College Graduate Program in Human Development, when researchers were investigating the kinds of parenting done by the parents of extraordinarily creative children. The three kinds of parenting are typically cited when discussing parenting styles: "Authoritarian" ("do as I say or else"), "Laissez Faire" ("do anything you want") and "Authoritative" ("here are the boundaries/rules, act within them and you'll be okay, but act outside of them and there will be consequences"). In most parenting books the "authoritative" style is what is recommended. These researchers discovered a fourth style of parenting that they called "the nurturing parent." This style focuses on responsibility, empathy, and creativity. The basic parenting approach that these parents took included:
1) Trusting in their children's fairness and good judgment.
2) Respecting their children's autonomy, thoughts, and feelings.
3) Supporting their children's interests and goals.
4) Enjoying their children's company.
5) Protecting their children from doing injury to self or others, not by establishing rules, but by communicating values, and discussing their children's behavior with them.
6) Modeling the self-control, sensitivity, and values they believe their children will need
There is an acronym for this type of type of discipline, "RECEPEE". In a book-in-process, Caring Parents: a Guide to Successful Parenting, by Clinical Social Worker Herbert Jay Rosenfield, LCSW, he encourages "Reasonable Expectations, Clearly Expressed, Performed Everyday, and by Example".
The nurturant parent model is discussed by George Lakoff
George Lakoff
George P. Lakoff is an American cognitive linguist and professor of linguistics at the University of California, Berkeley, where he has taught since 1972...
in his books, including Moral Politics
Moral Politics
Moral Politics: How Liberals and Conservatives Think is a 1996 book by cognitive linguist George Lakoff. It argues that conservatives and liberals hold two different conceptual models of morality. Conservatives have a Strict Father morality in which people are made good through self-discipline and...
and Whose Freedom? In these books, the nurturant parent model is contrasted with the strict father model
Strict father model
The strict father model of parenting is one which values strict discipline, particularly by the father, in parenting.Ideas involved in this model include:* That children learn through reward and punishment, as in operant conditioning....
. Lakoff argues that if the metaphor of nation as family and government as parent is used, then progressive
Progressivism
Progressivism is an umbrella term for a political ideology advocating or favoring social, political, and economic reform or changes. Progressivism is often viewed by some conservatives, constitutionalists, and libertarians to be in opposition to conservative or reactionary ideologies.The...
politics correspond to the nurturant parent model. For example, progressives want the government to make sure that the citizens are protected and assisted to achieve their potential. This might take the form of tough environmental regulations or healthcare assistance.
The model is also consistent with Slow parenting
Slow parenting
Slow parenting is a parenting style in which few activities are organised for children. Instead, they are allowed to explore the world at their own pace...
, in that children are encouraged to explore the world for themselves. They have to learn to face the risks that nature presents. Although Slow parenting
Slow parenting
Slow parenting is a parenting style in which few activities are organised for children. Instead, they are allowed to explore the world at their own pace...
might go further and reduce the level of protection offered by parents, it would not advocate withholding it entirely.
See also
- Strict father modelStrict father modelThe strict father model of parenting is one which values strict discipline, particularly by the father, in parenting.Ideas involved in this model include:* That children learn through reward and punishment, as in operant conditioning....
- Slow parentingSlow parentingSlow parenting is a parenting style in which few activities are organised for children. Instead, they are allowed to explore the world at their own pace...
- Parenting stylesParenting stylesA parenting style is a psychological construct representing standard strategies that parents use in their child rearing. There are many differing theories and opinions on the best ways to rear children, as well as differing levels of time and effort that parents are willing to invest.Many parents...
- Dr Spock
Reverend George Englehardt stated succinctly, in 1991, that "parental responsibility is to provide their children with a 'safe, loving, nurturing environment'".