Candy Is Dandy But liquor Is quicker.

Man is a victim of dopeIn the incurable form of hope.

Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of proven criminals?

Just when you think that at least the outlook is so black that it can grow no blacker, it worsens,And that is why I do not like the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so many of the wrong persons.

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

I dreamt that my hair was kempt. Then I dreamt that my true love unkempt it.

It is common knowledge to every schoolboy and even every Bachelor of Arts,That all sin is divided into two parts.One kind of sin is called a sin of commission, and that is very important And it is what you are doing when you are doing something you ortant...

It is the sin of omission, the second kind of sin,That lays eggs under your skin.

The moral is that it is probably better not to sin at all, but ifsome kind of sin you must be pursuing,Well, remember to do it by doing rather than by not doing.

To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.