Spiritual friendship
Encyclopedia
is a Buddhist concept of "spiritual friendship" within Buddhist community life, applicable to both monastic
and householder
relationships. One involved in such a relationship is known as a "good friend," "virtuous friend," "noble friend" or "admirable friend" .
Since early Buddhist history, these relationships have involved spiritual teacher-student dyads as well as communal peer groups. In general, such is a supportive relationship based on shared Buddhist ethical values
and the pursuit of enlightenment
.
In contemporary Western society, this concept has gained increased currency within the Triratna Buddhist Community (formerly the Friends of the Western Buddhist Order) (UK) and Jack Kornfield
's Spirit Rock Meditation Center (USA).
's Upaddha Sutta (SN
45.2), there is a conversation between the Buddha and his disciple Ananda
in which Ananda enthusiastically declares, 'This is half of the holy life, lord: admirable friendship, admirable companionship, admirable camaraderie.' The Buddha replies:
The Buddha elaborates that, through such friendships, one develops each of the path factors through seclusion, dispassion and cessation. Further, the Buddha states that through spiritual friendship with the Buddha himself followers have gained release from suffering.
According to Dr. R.L. Soni, canonical discourses state that "companionship with the wise" leads to the following developmental progression: "listening to good advice, rational faith, noble thoughts, clear thinking, self-control, good conduct, conquest of the hindrances, gaining of wisdom and the consequent liberation."
More broadly, in Itivuttaka
1.17, the Buddha declares:
In terms of householders, the Buddha provides the following elaboration in the Dighajanu Sutta
(AN
8.54):
." The good friend should understand the Tipitaka, kamma
, "beneficient worldly knowledge" and the Four Noble Truths
. Citing AN
7.36, Upatissa says that a "good friend" should have the following seven qualities:
In the fifth-century CE Visuddhimagga
("Path of Purification"), Buddhaghosa
also mentions the need to find a "good friend" in the context of finding one who will be your "giver of a meditation
subject
." As did Upatissa, Buddhaghosa refers to the seven qualities of AN 7.36 and adds that only the Buddha has all these qualities. If the Buddha is not available to be the good friend, then one of the eighty great disciples
is recommended; if one of them is not available, then one should find for a good friend who has destroyed all fetters through the attainment of all jhanas and the development of insight
. Otherwise, in descending order, one may choose: a non-returner
or once-returner
or stream enterer
or non-arahant who has attained a jhanic state, or one who knows the Tipitaka or two pitakas or one pitaka, or one who knows a nikaya
and its commentaries and who is conscientious.
. From the aforementioned suttas, we can see that the Buddha believed it vital for spiritual growth to have a spiritual friend. This friendship is built on a deep respect for the teacher's knowledge and the student's potential, and, through this respect and friendship, the two individuals learn constructive behaviour. Constructive behaviour in Buddhism is to think, speak, and behave in a constructive way towards life, leading to personal happiness, and, then, to enlightenment
.
Within the Vajrayana
tradition, the teacher/student relationship is considered of extreme importance to guide the student on the proper tantric path and to avoid the harmful consequences of misunderstanding and incorrect practice.
Sangharakshita
, the founder of the FWBO, says of Spiritual friendship:
It is believed that by having a group of peers as spiritual friends, we learn more about being good people than if we were in isolation.
Bhikkhu
A Bhikkhu or Bhikṣu is an ordained male Buddhist monastic. A female monastic is called a Bhikkhuni Nepali: ). The life of Bhikkhus and Bhikkhunis is governed by a set of rules called the patimokkha within the vinaya's framework of monastic discipline...
and householder
Householder (Buddhism)
In English translations of Buddhist literature, householder denotes a variety of terms. Most broadly, it refers to any layperson, and most narrowly, to a wealthy and prestigious familial patriarch...
relationships. One involved in such a relationship is known as a "good friend," "virtuous friend," "noble friend" or "admirable friend" .
Since early Buddhist history, these relationships have involved spiritual teacher-student dyads as well as communal peer groups. In general, such is a supportive relationship based on shared Buddhist ethical values
Sila
Śīla or sīla in Buddhism and its non-sectarian offshoots, is a code of conduct that embraces self-restraint with a value on non-harming. It has been variously described as virtue, good conduct, morality, moral discipline and precept. It is an action that is an intentional effort...
and the pursuit of enlightenment
Bodhi
Bodhi is both a Pāli and Sanskrit word traditionally translated into English with the word "enlightenment", but which means awakened. In Buddhism it is the knowledge possessed by a Buddha into the nature of things...
.
In contemporary Western society, this concept has gained increased currency within the Triratna Buddhist Community (formerly the Friends of the Western Buddhist Order) (UK) and Jack Kornfield
Jack Kornfield
Jack Kornfield is a teacher in the vipassana movement of American Theravada Buddhism. He trained as a Buddhist monk in Thailand, Burma and India, including as a student of the Thai monk Ajahn Chah...
's Spirit Rock Meditation Center (USA).
Canonical sources
In the Pali CanonPāli Canon
The Pāli Canon is the standard collection of scriptures in the Theravada Buddhist tradition, as preserved in the Pāli language. It is the only completely surviving early Buddhist canon, and one of the first to be written down...
's Upaddha Sutta (SN
Samyutta Nikaya
The Samyutta Nikaya is a Buddhist scripture, the third of the five nikayas, or collections, in the Sutta Pitaka, which is one of the "three baskets" that compose the Pali Tipitaka of Theravada Buddhism. Because of the abbreviated way parts of the text are written, the total number of suttas is...
45.2), there is a conversation between the Buddha and his disciple Ananda
Ananda
Ānanda was one of the principal disciples and a devout attendant of the Buddha. Amongst the Buddha's many disciples, Ānanda had the most retentive memory and most of the suttas in the Sutta Pitaka are attributed to his recollection of the Buddha's teachings during the First Buddhist Council...
in which Ananda enthusiastically declares, 'This is half of the holy life, lord: admirable friendship, admirable companionship, admirable camaraderie.' The Buddha replies:
- 'Don't say that, Ananda. Don't say that. Admirable friendship, admirable companionship, admirable camaraderie is actually the whole of the holy life. When a monk has admirable people as friends, companions, & comrades, he can be expected to develop & pursue the noble eightfold pathNoble Eightfold PathThe Noble Eightfold Path , is one of the principal teachings of the Buddha, who described it as the way leading to the cessation of suffering and the achievement of self-awakening. It is used to develop insight into the true nature of phenomena and to eradicate greed, hatred, and delusion...
.'
The Buddha elaborates that, through such friendships, one develops each of the path factors through seclusion, dispassion and cessation. Further, the Buddha states that through spiritual friendship with the Buddha himself followers have gained release from suffering.
According to Dr. R.L. Soni, canonical discourses state that "companionship with the wise" leads to the following developmental progression: "listening to good advice, rational faith, noble thoughts, clear thinking, self-control, good conduct, conquest of the hindrances, gaining of wisdom and the consequent liberation."
More broadly, in Itivuttaka
Itivuttaka
The Itivuttaka is a Buddhist scripture, part of the Pali Canon of Theravada Buddhism and is attributed to Khujjuttara's recollection of Buddha's discourses. It is included there in the Sutta Pitaka's Khuddaka Nikaya. It comprises 112 short teachings ascribed in the text to the Buddha, each...
1.17, the Buddha declares:
- 'With regard to external factors, I don't envision any other single factor like admirable friendship as doing so much for a monk in training, who has not attained the heart's goal but remains intent on the unsurpassed safety from bondage. A monk who is a friend with admirable people abandons what is unskillful and develops what is skillful.'
In terms of householders, the Buddha provides the following elaboration in the Dighajanu Sutta
Dighajanu Sutta
The Dighajanu Sutta , also known as Byagghapajja Sutta and Vyagghapajja Sutta, is part of the Anguttara Nikaya . For Theravada scholars, this Pali canon discourse is one of several considered key to understanding Buddhist lay ethics...
(AN
Anguttara Nikaya
The Anguttara Nikaya is a Buddhist scripture, the fourth of the five nikayas, or collections, in the Sutta Pitaka, which is one of the "three baskets" that comprise the Pali Tipitaka of Theravada Buddhism...
8.54):
- 'And what is meant by admirable friendship? There is the case where a lay person, in whatever town or village he may dwell, spends time with householders or householders' sons, young or old, who are advanced in virtue. He talks with them, engages them in discussions. He emulates consummate conviction in those who are consummate in conviction, consummate virtue in those who are consummate in virtue, consummate generosity in those who are consummate in generosity, and consummate discernment in those who are consummate in discernment. This is called admirable friendship.'
Post-canonical Pali texts
In the first-century CE exegetic Vimuttimagga ("Path of Freedom"), Arahant Upatissa identifies the need to find a "good friend" or "pre-eminent friend" in order to develop "excellent concentrationSamadhi (Buddhism)
In Buddhism, samādhi is mental concentration or composing the mind.-In the early Suttas:In the Pāli canon of the Theravada tradition and the related Āgamas of other early Buddhist schools, samādhi is found in the following contexts:* In the noble eightfold path, "right concentration" In Buddhism,...
." The good friend should understand the Tipitaka, kamma
Kamma
Kamma may refer to:*Kamma , a caste or social group found largely in Southern India*The Pali and Ardhamagadhi term for karma*Bava Kamma, a traditional Jewish civil law procedure dealing largely with damages and compensation....
, "beneficient worldly knowledge" and the Four Noble Truths
Four Noble Truths
The Four Noble Truths are an important principle in Buddhism, classically taught by the Buddha in the Dharmacakra Pravartana Sūtra....
. Citing AN
Anguttara Nikaya
The Anguttara Nikaya is a Buddhist scripture, the fourth of the five nikayas, or collections, in the Sutta Pitaka, which is one of the "three baskets" that comprise the Pali Tipitaka of Theravada Buddhism...
7.36, Upatissa says that a "good friend" should have the following seven qualities:
- "Loveableness, esteemableness, venerableness, the ability to counsel well, patience (in listening), the ability to deliver deep discourses and the not applying oneself to useless ends."
In the fifth-century CE Visuddhimagga
Visuddhimagga
The Visuddhimagga , is the 'great treatise' on Theravada Buddhist doctrine written by Buddhaghosa approximately in 430 CE in Sri Lanka. A comprehensive manual condensing the theoretical and practical teaching of the Buddha, it is considered the most important Theravada text outside of the Tipitaka...
("Path of Purification"), Buddhaghosa
Buddhaghosa
Bhadantācariya Buddhaghoṣa（Chinese: 覺音）was a 5th-century Indian Theravadin Buddhist commentator and scholar. His best-known work is the Visuddhimagga, or Path of Purification, a comprehensive summary and analysis of the Theravada understanding of the Buddha's path to liberation...
also mentions the need to find a "good friend" in the context of finding one who will be your "giver of a meditation
Buddhist meditation
Buddhist meditation refers to the meditative practices associated with the religion and philosophy of Buddhism.Core meditation techniques have been preserved in ancient Buddhist texts and have proliferated and diversified through teacher-student transmissions. Buddhists pursue meditation as part of...
subject
Kammatthana
In Buddhism, is a Pali word which literally means the place of work. Figuratively it means the place within the mind where one goes in order to work on spiritual development...
." As did Upatissa, Buddhaghosa refers to the seven qualities of AN 7.36 and adds that only the Buddha has all these qualities. If the Buddha is not available to be the good friend, then one of the eighty great disciples
Sravaka
Shravaka or Śrāvaka or Sāvaka means "hearer" or, more generally, "disciple".This term is used by both Buddhists and Jains. In Jainism, a shravaka is any lay Jain...
is recommended; if one of them is not available, then one should find for a good friend who has destroyed all fetters through the attainment of all jhanas and the development of insight
Vipassana
Vipassanā or vipaśyanā in the Buddhist tradition means insight into the true nature of reality. A regular practitioner of Vipassana is known as a Vipassi . Vipassana is one of the world's most ancient techniques of meditation, the inception of which is attributed to Gautama Buddha...
. Otherwise, in descending order, one may choose: a non-returner
Anagami
In Buddhism, an anāgāmi is a partially enlightened person who has cut off the first five chains that bind the ordinary mind. Anagami-ship is the third of the four stages of enlightenment....
or once-returner
Sakadagami
In Buddhism, the Sakadagami , "returning once" or "once-returner," is a partially-enlightened person, who has cut off the first three chains with which the ordinary mind is bound, and significantly weakened the fourth and fifth...
or stream enterer
Sotapanna
In Buddhism, a Sotāpanna , Srotāpanna , or "stream-winner" is a person who has eradicated the first three fetters of the mind. Sotapanna literally means "one who entered the stream ", after a metaphor which calls the Noble Eightfold Path, 'a stream'...
or non-arahant who has attained a jhanic state, or one who knows the Tipitaka or two pitakas or one pitaka, or one who knows a nikaya
Nikaya
Nikāya is a word of meaning "collection", "assemblage", "class" or "group" in both Pāḷi and Sanskrit. It is most commonly used in reference to the Buddhist texts of the Sutta Piṭaka, but can also refer to the monastic divisions of Theravāda Buddhism...
and its commentaries and who is conscientious.
The teacher/student relationship
In traditional schools of Buddhist thought, a spiritual friendship is a friendship not between one's peers, but a friendship between a student and their spiritual teacherGuru
A guru is one who is regarded as having great knowledge, wisdom, and authority in a certain area, and who uses it to guide others . Other forms of manifestation of this principle can include parents, school teachers, non-human objects and even one's own intellectual discipline, if the...
. From the aforementioned suttas, we can see that the Buddha believed it vital for spiritual growth to have a spiritual friend. This friendship is built on a deep respect for the teacher's knowledge and the student's potential, and, through this respect and friendship, the two individuals learn constructive behaviour. Constructive behaviour in Buddhism is to think, speak, and behave in a constructive way towards life, leading to personal happiness, and, then, to enlightenment
Bodhi
Bodhi is both a Pāli and Sanskrit word traditionally translated into English with the word "enlightenment", but which means awakened. In Buddhism it is the knowledge possessed by a Buddha into the nature of things...
.
Within the Vajrayana
Vajrayana
Vajrayāna Buddhism is also known as Tantric Buddhism, Tantrayāna, Mantrayāna, Secret Mantra, Esoteric Buddhism and the Diamond Vehicle...
tradition, the teacher/student relationship is considered of extreme importance to guide the student on the proper tantric path and to avoid the harmful consequences of misunderstanding and incorrect practice.
Peer relationships
Spiritual friendships are important to building a bond between peers with in the Buddhist community.Sangharakshita
Sangharakshita
Sangharakshita is a Buddhist teacher and writer, and founder of the Triratna Buddhist Community, which was known until 2010 as the Friends of the Western Buddhist Order, or FWBO....
, the founder of the FWBO, says of Spiritual friendship:
He also (Sangharakshita) stresses the value of friendships with peers, in particular having at least one platonic friend with whom we can be intimate and completely frank. Through friendship we have the opportunity to develop the virtues of generosity, compassion, patience and forgiveness.
It is believed that by having a group of peers as spiritual friends, we learn more about being good people than if we were in isolation.
See also
- Dighajanu SuttaDighajanu SuttaThe Dighajanu Sutta , also known as Byagghapajja Sutta and Vyagghapajja Sutta, is part of the Anguttara Nikaya . For Theravada scholars, this Pali canon discourse is one of several considered key to understanding Buddhist lay ethics...
- contextualizes among other householder duties.
External links
- Bullitt, John T. (2005). Admirable friendship: Kalyanamittata [An anthology from the Pali Canon]. Retrieved 20 July 2007 from "Access to Insight" at http://www.accesstoinsight.org/ptf/dhamma/sacca/sacca4/samma-ditthi/kalyanamittata.html.
- Subhuti (2001). Good Company [essay on spiritual friendship]. Printed in Dharmalife (No. 17, Winter 2001). Retrieved from "DharmaLife" at http://www.dharmalife.com/issue17/goodcompany.html.
- Spiritual Friendship by Bhikkhu BodhiBhikkhu BodhiBhikkhu Bodhi , born Jeffrey Block, is an American Theravada Buddhist monk, ordained in Sri Lanka and currently teaching in the New York/New Jersey area...