The Come-back of Battling Billson
Encyclopedia
"The Come-back of Battling Bilson" is a short story
by P. G. Wodehouse
, which first appeared in the United States
in the June 1935 issue of Cosmopolitan
and in the United Kingdom
in the July 1935 Strand
. It was included in the collection Lord Emsworth and Others
, published in the U.K in 1937, and in the U.S. version of Eggs, Beans and Crumpets, published in 1940. It features the irrepressible Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge
.
About to be left alone once more at his Aunt Julia's house, Ukridge realises he can make some quick cash by renting out the lawns to a party of folk dance
rs. Of course, Aunt Julia's trip is unexpectedly cancelled, and Ukridge needs some cash to pay back the dancers, who are upset at having their party cancelled at the last minute.
Ukridge sets up a bout for "Battling" Billson, using the man's desire to wed his girl Flossie to persuade him to take part. Finding Billson's training methods (mostly involving ale
and cigar
s) somewhat lacking, Ukridge inveigles the big boxer into his Aunt's house as an odd-job man, allowing him to personally supervise the training regime. His aunt is a little nonplussed, but is soon persuaded everything is alright.
The training continues apace, but Billson seems to be benefitting little. His waist expands and his wind does not. The butler Oakshott, it emerges, having wowed Billson with his dignified manner, is now plying the boxer with an excess of food, cigars and port
. Ukridge has just discovered that the conniving butler has money on Billson's opponent in the upcoming bout, when Aunt Julia learns of Ukridge's dance scheme, and throws him out of the house. He tries to persuade Billson to leave with him, but the big man resolutely refuses.
Ukridge, seeing disaster loom, fetches Flossie to the house to talk some sense into Billson. They find he has gone to the pictures
with the butler, and hasten down there, but Flossie is as weak before the butler's fatherly gaze as Billson himself. All four of them end up in the cinema, at a screening of The Jazz Singer
. When the talking starts up, Billson is enraged, calling loudly for quiet in the cinema. The audience reacts strongly, fighting ensues, and Billson is hauled off to jail for two weeks. He emerges trim and in top form, easily besting his opponent in the ring.
Short story
A short story is a work of fiction that is usually written in prose, often in narrative format. This format tends to be more pointed than longer works of fiction, such as novellas and novels. Short story definitions based on length differ somewhat, even among professional writers, in part because...
by P. G. Wodehouse
P. G. Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse, KBE was an English humorist, whose body of work includes novels, short stories, plays, poems, song lyrics, and numerous pieces of journalism. He enjoyed enormous popular success during a career that lasted more than seventy years and his many writings continue to be...
, which first appeared in the United States
United States
The United States of America is a federal constitutional republic comprising fifty states and a federal district...
in the June 1935 issue of Cosmopolitan
Cosmopolitan (magazine)
Cosmopolitan is an international magazine for women. It was first published in 1886 in the United States as a family magazine, was later transformed into a literary magazine and eventually became a women's magazine in the late 1960s...
and in the United Kingdom
United Kingdom
The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern IrelandIn the United Kingdom and Dependencies, other languages have been officially recognised as legitimate autochthonous languages under the European Charter for Regional or Minority Languages...
in the July 1935 Strand
Strand Magazine
The Strand Magazine was a monthly magazine composed of fictional stories and factual articles founded by George Newnes. It was first published in the United Kingdom from January 1891 to March 1950 running to 711 issues, though the first issue was on sale well before Christmas 1890.Its immediate...
. It was included in the collection Lord Emsworth and Others
Lord Emsworth and Others
-External links:* , with a list of characters and publication dates* , with details of published editions, photos of book covers and links to used copies...
, published in the U.K in 1937, and in the U.S. version of Eggs, Beans and Crumpets, published in 1940. It features the irrepressible Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge
Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge
Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge is a fictional character from the short stories and novels of P. G. Wodehouse.Ukridge is a schemer who will do anything to increase his funding -- except, of course, work. An alert and creative opportunist, he makes sure that no kindness shown to him, however...
.
Main characters
- Stanley Featherstonehaugh UkridgeStanley Featherstonehaugh UkridgeStanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge is a fictional character from the short stories and novels of P. G. Wodehouse.Ukridge is a schemer who will do anything to increase his funding -- except, of course, work. An alert and creative opportunist, he makes sure that no kindness shown to him, however...
, the irrepressible entrepreneur- Julia Ukridge, his haughty writer aunt
- Oakshott, Julia's butler
- Julia Ukridge, his haughty writer aunt
- Jimmy Corcoran, Ukridge's writer friend
- "Battling" Billson, a boxer sometimes manages by Ukridge
- Flossie, Billson's girl, a barmaid
Plot
Jimmy Corcoran, having had a story idea turned down by Hollywood, attacks the talking picture, but his friend Ukridge comes to its defence. He has, he says, always had a special affection for the talkies. He tells his friend why...About to be left alone once more at his Aunt Julia's house, Ukridge realises he can make some quick cash by renting out the lawns to a party of folk dance
Folk dance
The term folk dance describes dances that share some or all of the following attributes:*They are dances performed at social functions by people with little or no professional training, often to traditional music or music based on traditional music....
rs. Of course, Aunt Julia's trip is unexpectedly cancelled, and Ukridge needs some cash to pay back the dancers, who are upset at having their party cancelled at the last minute.
Ukridge sets up a bout for "Battling" Billson, using the man's desire to wed his girl Flossie to persuade him to take part. Finding Billson's training methods (mostly involving ale
Ale
Ale is a type of beer brewed from malted barley using a warm fermentation with a strain of brewers' yeast. The yeast will ferment the beer quickly, giving it a sweet, full bodied and fruity taste...
and cigar
Cigar
A cigar is a tightly-rolled bundle of dried and fermented tobacco that is ignited so that its smoke may be drawn into the mouth. Cigar tobacco is grown in significant quantities in Brazil, Cameroon, Cuba, the Dominican Republic, Honduras, Indonesia, Mexico, Nicaragua, Philippines, and the Eastern...
s) somewhat lacking, Ukridge inveigles the big boxer into his Aunt's house as an odd-job man, allowing him to personally supervise the training regime. His aunt is a little nonplussed, but is soon persuaded everything is alright.
The training continues apace, but Billson seems to be benefitting little. His waist expands and his wind does not. The butler Oakshott, it emerges, having wowed Billson with his dignified manner, is now plying the boxer with an excess of food, cigars and port
Port
A port is a location on a coast or shore containing one or more harbors where ships can dock and transfer people or cargo to or from land....
. Ukridge has just discovered that the conniving butler has money on Billson's opponent in the upcoming bout, when Aunt Julia learns of Ukridge's dance scheme, and throws him out of the house. He tries to persuade Billson to leave with him, but the big man resolutely refuses.
Ukridge, seeing disaster loom, fetches Flossie to the house to talk some sense into Billson. They find he has gone to the pictures
Movie theater
A movie theater, cinema, movie house, picture theater, film theater is a venue, usually a building, for viewing motion pictures ....
with the butler, and hasten down there, but Flossie is as weak before the butler's fatherly gaze as Billson himself. All four of them end up in the cinema, at a screening of The Jazz Singer
The Jazz Singer (1927 film)
The Jazz Singer is a 1927 American musical film. The first feature-length motion picture with synchronized dialogue sequences, its release heralded the commercial ascendance of the "talkies" and the decline of the silent film era. Produced by Warner Bros. with its Vitaphone sound-on-disc system,...
. When the talking starts up, Billson is enraged, calling loudly for quiet in the cinema. The audience reacts strongly, fighting ensues, and Billson is hauled off to jail for two weeks. He emerges trim and in top form, easily besting his opponent in the ring.
See also
- List of Wodehouse's Ukridge stories