The Greasy Pole
Encyclopedia
"The Greasy Pole" is the eleventh episode of the BBC
comedy series Yes Minister
and was first broadcast 16 March 1981. In this episode, the final ' Yes Minister ' is uttered by Bernard Woolley
. The episode's title is an allusion to a famous quotation by Benjamin Disraeli: "I have climbed to the top of the greasy pole". In Disraeli's case, it referred to achieving high political office while being of Jewish parentage.
is meeting in his office with Sir Wally McFarlane, Chairman of the British Chemical Corporation, which is on the verge of securing a massive contract from the Italians for the manufacture of propanol
at their plant in Merseyside
. However, Sir Humphrey is stating the government's concern that the propanol will contain metadioxin, an inert
compound — unlike the toxic dioxin. The government has set up the Henderson Committee to examine the matter, but Sir Wally is confident that his company will be given the all clear. Sir Humphrey agrees and is sure that his Minister
, Jim Hacker
, will raise no objection, providing the proposal is communicated to him tactfully.
Later, Sir Humphrey is doing just that, and Hacker is in favour of the proposition, which, with its employment and export potential, seems too good to be true. His Permanent Secretary
allays his fears over metadioxin and all is well so far. Then Joan Littler, the MP
for Liverpool
South West, arrives. She is also the Prime Minister's
Parliamentary Private Secretary
and the chemical plant in question is in her constituency
. She is worried about the rumours regarding public safety and seeks the Minister's assurance that a full public inquiry will be held. Hacker is about to agree but Sir Humphrey talks over him and tells the MP that there is no need. However, she insists on knowing the difference between dioxin and metadioxin. Nobody around the table can help as they haven't studied chemistry
— Sir Humphrey making this abundantly clear by defining an inert compound as one that isn't "ert" (to which Bernard mutters "Wouldn't 'ert' a fly"). Despite their reassurances that the proposal will not go ahead unless it is given a clean bill of health, Ms Littler is not satisfied and leaves. Hacker now confesses to Sir Humphrey that he still has doubts, but he is told that if the Henderson Committee does not produce a favourable report, the government will use another one instead, leave Henderson's unpublished and discredit it via means of press leaks. Sir Humphrey goes on to explain in detail the standard practice in such circumstances, while Hacker takes notes. Then Bernard
informs the Minister that the BCC contract will be featured in a report on the next news bulletin. They watch it, and it becomes apparent that there is a large body of public opinion against the scheme, due to the fatal release of dioxin in the Seveso disaster
in 1976. Immediately afterwards, the Prime Minister calls Hacker and convinces him not to go ahead. But Sir Humphrey has no intention of carrying out the Minister's wishes and, after Hacker has left the office, calls the editor of The Times
.
Sure enough, the report's positive conclusions are leaked and the next day, Hacker is left with no escape route. Sir Wally McFarlane calls in to see him, with Sir Humphrey hot on his heels. The Minister informs the Chairman that he is still not prepared to commit to allowing the contract, and Sir Wally leaves in disgust, threatening to resign his position if Hacker doesn't change his view. Sir Humphrey castigates the Minister over his stance, but Hacker states that his hands must be kept clean. His Permanent Secretary remarks on the difficulty of doing this when climbing "the greasy pole" and he too exits the office. Hacker confides in his Principal Private Secretary
and asks Bernard for his advice: he will be censured by the press whether he gives the contract the go-ahead or not. He decides to meet Professor Henderson himself by "coincidentally" dropping into King's College, Cambridge
when the report's author is due to visit there.
Hacker meets Henderson, and by rigorously adopting Sir Humphrey's discrediting procedure as outlined to him earlier, successfully convinces the Professor to doubt his findings.
The Minister watches the next evening's news bulletin with Sir Humphrey and Bernard. It reports his decision not to proceed with the contract and his resulting triumphant visit to Merseyside. His Permanent Secretary is disgusted, and can't fathom how Henderson came to his ultimate conclusion. Hacker nearly lets slip that he met him, but covers his faux pas just in time.
BBC
The British Broadcasting Corporation is a British public service broadcaster. Its headquarters is at Broadcasting House in the City of Westminster, London. It is the largest broadcaster in the world, with about 23,000 staff...
comedy series Yes Minister
Yes Minister
Yes Minister is a satirical British sitcom written by Antony Jay and Jonathan Lynn that was first transmitted by BBC Television between 1980–1982 and 1984, split over three seven-episode series. The sequel, Yes, Prime Minister, ran from 1986 to 1988. In total there were 38 episodes—of which all but...
and was first broadcast 16 March 1981. In this episode, the final ' Yes Minister ' is uttered by Bernard Woolley
Bernard Woolley
Sir Bernard Woolley GCB is one of the three main fictional characters of the 1980s British sitcom Yes Minister and its sequel, Yes, Prime Minister. He was portrayed by Derek Fowlds.-Character:...
. The episode's title is an allusion to a famous quotation by Benjamin Disraeli: "I have climbed to the top of the greasy pole". In Disraeli's case, it referred to achieving high political office while being of Jewish parentage.
Plot
Sir Humphrey ApplebyHumphrey Appleby
Sir Humphrey Appleby, GCB, KBE, MVO, MA , is a fictional character from the British television series Yes, Minister and Yes, Prime Minister. He was played by Sir Nigel Hawthorne. In Yes Minister, he is the Permanent Secretary for the Department of Administrative Affairs...
is meeting in his office with Sir Wally McFarlane, Chairman of the British Chemical Corporation, which is on the verge of securing a massive contract from the Italians for the manufacture of propanol
Propan-1-ol
1-Propanol is a primary alcohol with the molecular formula of C3H8O, and a structural formula of CH3CH2CH2OH. It is also known as propan-1-ol, 1-propyl alcohol, n-propyl alcohol, n-propanol, or simply propanol. It is an isomer of isopropanol . It is used as a solvent in the pharmaceutical...
at their plant in Merseyside
Merseyside
Merseyside is a metropolitan county in North West England, with a population of 1,365,900. It encompasses the metropolitan area centred on both banks of the lower reaches of the Mersey Estuary, and comprises five metropolitan boroughs: Knowsley, St Helens, Sefton, Wirral, and the city of Liverpool...
. However, Sir Humphrey is stating the government's concern that the propanol will contain metadioxin, an inert
Inert
-Chemistry:In chemistry, the term inert is used to describe a substance that is not chemically reactive.The noble gases were previously known as inert gases because of their perceived lack of participation in any chemical reactions...
compound — unlike the toxic dioxin. The government has set up the Henderson Committee to examine the matter, but Sir Wally is confident that his company will be given the all clear. Sir Humphrey agrees and is sure that his Minister
Minister (government)
A minister is a politician who holds significant public office in a national or regional government. Senior ministers are members of the cabinet....
, Jim Hacker
James Hacker
James George Hacker, Baron Hacker of Islington, KG, PC, B. Sc. , Hon. D. C. L. was a fictional British politician. He was the Minister of the fictional Department of Administrative Affairs, and later the Prime Minister, in the 1980s British sitcom Yes Minister and its sequel, Yes, Prime Minister...
, will raise no objection, providing the proposal is communicated to him tactfully.
Later, Sir Humphrey is doing just that, and Hacker is in favour of the proposition, which, with its employment and export potential, seems too good to be true. His Permanent Secretary
Permanent Secretary
The Permanent secretary, in most departments officially titled the permanent under-secretary of state , is the most senior civil servant of a British Government ministry, charged with running the department on a day-to-day basis...
allays his fears over metadioxin and all is well so far. Then Joan Littler, the MP
Member of Parliament
A Member of Parliament is a representative of the voters to a :parliament. In many countries with bicameral parliaments, the term applies specifically to members of the lower house, as upper houses often have a different title, such as senate, and thus also have different titles for its members,...
for Liverpool
Liverpool
Liverpool is a city and metropolitan borough of Merseyside, England, along the eastern side of the Mersey Estuary. It was founded as a borough in 1207 and was granted city status in 1880...
South West, arrives. She is also the Prime Minister's
Prime Minister of the United Kingdom
The Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland is the Head of Her Majesty's Government in the United Kingdom. The Prime Minister and Cabinet are collectively accountable for their policies and actions to the Sovereign, to Parliament, to their political party and...
Parliamentary Private Secretary
Parliamentary Private Secretary
A Parliamentary Private Secretary is a role given to a United Kingdom Member of Parliament by a senior minister in government or shadow minister to act as their contact for the House of Commons; this role is junior to that of Parliamentary Under-Secretary, which is a ministerial post, salaried by...
and the chemical plant in question is in her constituency
United Kingdom constituencies
In the United Kingdom , each of the electoral areas or divisions called constituencies elects one or more members to a parliament or assembly.Within the United Kingdom there are now five bodies with members elected by constituencies:...
. She is worried about the rumours regarding public safety and seeks the Minister's assurance that a full public inquiry will be held. Hacker is about to agree but Sir Humphrey talks over him and tells the MP that there is no need. However, she insists on knowing the difference between dioxin and metadioxin. Nobody around the table can help as they haven't studied chemistry
Chemistry
Chemistry is the science of matter, especially its chemical reactions, but also its composition, structure and properties. Chemistry is concerned with atoms and their interactions with other atoms, and particularly with the properties of chemical bonds....
— Sir Humphrey making this abundantly clear by defining an inert compound as one that isn't "ert" (to which Bernard mutters "Wouldn't 'ert' a fly"). Despite their reassurances that the proposal will not go ahead unless it is given a clean bill of health, Ms Littler is not satisfied and leaves. Hacker now confesses to Sir Humphrey that he still has doubts, but he is told that if the Henderson Committee does not produce a favourable report, the government will use another one instead, leave Henderson's unpublished and discredit it via means of press leaks. Sir Humphrey goes on to explain in detail the standard practice in such circumstances, while Hacker takes notes. Then Bernard
Bernard Woolley
Sir Bernard Woolley GCB is one of the three main fictional characters of the 1980s British sitcom Yes Minister and its sequel, Yes, Prime Minister. He was portrayed by Derek Fowlds.-Character:...
informs the Minister that the BCC contract will be featured in a report on the next news bulletin. They watch it, and it becomes apparent that there is a large body of public opinion against the scheme, due to the fatal release of dioxin in the Seveso disaster
Seveso disaster
The Seveso disaster was an industrial accident that occurred around 12:37 pm July 10, 1976, in a small chemical manufacturing plant approximately north of Milan in the Lombardy region in Italy...
in 1976. Immediately afterwards, the Prime Minister calls Hacker and convinces him not to go ahead. But Sir Humphrey has no intention of carrying out the Minister's wishes and, after Hacker has left the office, calls the editor of The Times
The Times
The Times is a British daily national newspaper, first published in London in 1785 under the title The Daily Universal Register . The Times and its sister paper The Sunday Times are published by Times Newspapers Limited, a subsidiary since 1981 of News International...
.
Sure enough, the report's positive conclusions are leaked and the next day, Hacker is left with no escape route. Sir Wally McFarlane calls in to see him, with Sir Humphrey hot on his heels. The Minister informs the Chairman that he is still not prepared to commit to allowing the contract, and Sir Wally leaves in disgust, threatening to resign his position if Hacker doesn't change his view. Sir Humphrey castigates the Minister over his stance, but Hacker states that his hands must be kept clean. His Permanent Secretary remarks on the difficulty of doing this when climbing "the greasy pole" and he too exits the office. Hacker confides in his Principal Private Secretary
Principal Private Secretary
In the British Civil Service and Australian Public Service the Principal Private Secretary is the civil servant who runs a cabinet minister's private office...
and asks Bernard for his advice: he will be censured by the press whether he gives the contract the go-ahead or not. He decides to meet Professor Henderson himself by "coincidentally" dropping into King's College, Cambridge
King's College, Cambridge
King's College is a constituent college of the University of Cambridge, England. The college's full name is "The King's College of our Lady and Saint Nicholas in Cambridge", but it is usually referred to simply as "King's" within the University....
when the report's author is due to visit there.
Hacker meets Henderson, and by rigorously adopting Sir Humphrey's discrediting procedure as outlined to him earlier, successfully convinces the Professor to doubt his findings.
The Minister watches the next evening's news bulletin with Sir Humphrey and Bernard. It reports his decision not to proceed with the contract and his resulting triumphant visit to Merseyside. His Permanent Secretary is disgusted, and can't fathom how Henderson came to his ultimate conclusion. Hacker nearly lets slip that he met him, but covers his faux pas just in time.
Episode cast
| Actor | Role |
|---|---|
| Paul Eddington Paul Eddington Paul Eddington CBE was an English actor best known for his appearances in popular television sitcoms of the 1970s and 80s: The Good Life, Yes Minister and Yes, Prime Minister.-Early life:... |
Jim Hacker |
| Nigel Hawthorne Nigel Hawthorne Sir Nigel Barnard Hawthorne, CBE was an English actor, perhaps best remembered for his role as Sir Humphrey Appleby, the Permanent Secretary in the 1980s sitcom Yes Minister and the Cabinet Secretary in its sequel, Yes, Prime Minister. For this role he won four BAFTA Awards during the 1980s in the... |
Sir Humphrey Appleby |
| Derek Fowlds Derek Fowlds Derek Fowlds is an English actor, known for playing Bernard Woolley in popular British television comedies Yes, Minister and Yes, Prime Minister and Oscar Blaketon in the long-running ITV police drama Heartbeat.... |
Bernard Woolley |
| Brenda Blethyn Brenda Blethyn Brenda Anne Blethyn, OBE is an English actress who has worked in theatre, television and film. Blethyn has received two Academy Award nominations, two SAG Award nominations, two Emmy Award nominations and three Golden Globe Award nominations, winning one... |
Joan Littler |
| Freddie Earlle | Sir Wally McFarlane |
| Jerome Willis Jerome Willis Jerome Willis is a prominent British stage and screen actor with more than 100 screen credits to his name.Willis had a leading role in the ITV drama series The Sandbaggers as Matthew Peele. He also appeared in Z Cars as DCS Richards, Within These Walls as Charles Radley, and Doctor Who as... |
Professor Henderson |
| Geoffrey Toone Geoffrey Toone Geoffrey Toone was an Irish-born character actor.Most of Toone's film roles after the 1930s were in supporting parts, usually as authority figures, though he did play the lead character in the Hammer Films production The Terror of the Tongs in 1961Toone was born in Dublin, Ireland to English... |
Lord Crichton |
| Robert Dougall Robert Dougall Robert Dougall MBE was a British broadcaster and ornithologist, mainly known as a newsreader and announcer.-Television news:... |
Newsreader |
| Sheila Fay | Woman Protester |
| Maureen Stevens | Lady Crichton |
| Lindy Alexander | BBC Reporter |