Vanilla sex is a description of what a culture regards as standard or conventional sexual behaviour. Different cultures, subcultures and individuals have different ideas about what constitutes this type of sex. Often, it is interpreted as sex which does not involve such elements as BDSM

BDSM

BDSM is an erotic preference and a form of sexual expression involving the consensual use of restraint, intense sensory stimulation, and fantasy power role-play. The compound acronym BDSM is derived from the terms bondage and discipline , dominance and submission , and sadism and masochism...

, kink

Kink (sexual)

In human sexuality, kinkiness and kinky are terms used to refer to a playful usage of sexual concepts in an accentuated, and unambiguously expressive form....

, or fetish

Sexual fetishism

Sexual fetishism, or erotic fetishism, is the sexual arousal a person receives from a physical object, or from a specific situation. The object or situation of interest is called the fetish, the person a fetishist who has a fetish for that object/situation. Sexual fetishism may be regarded, e.g...

 activities.

Description

Among heterosexual couples in the Western world, vanilla sex often refers to the missionary position

Missionary position

The missionary position is a "man-on-top" sex position usually described as the act in which the woman lies on her back and the partners face each other. Though often acted on and applied by heterosexual pairings, it may also be used by gay and lesbian couples.The missionary position is an example...

. It can also be used to describe insertive sex without any element of BDSM or any fetish. The British Medical Journal

BMJ

BMJ is a partially open-access peer-reviewed medical journal. Originally called the British Medical Journal, the title was officially shortened to BMJ in 1988. The journal is published by the BMJ Group, a wholly owned subsidiary of the British Medical Association...

defines vanilla sex between homosexual couples as "sex that does not extend beyond affection, mutual masturbation, and oral

Oral sex

Oral sex is sexual activity involving the stimulation of the genitalia of a sex partner by the use of the mouth, tongue, teeth or throat. Cunnilingus refers to oral sex performed on females while fellatio refer to oral sex performed on males. Anilingus refers to oral stimulation of a person's anus...

 and anal sex

Anal sex

Anal sex is the sex act in which the penis is inserted into the anus of a sexual partner. The term can also include other sexual acts involving the anus, including pegging, anilingus , fingering, and object insertion.Common misconception describes anal sex as practiced almost exclusively by gay men...

." This is contrasted by non-insertive

Non-penetrative sex

Non-penetrative sex is sexual activity without vaginal, anal, or oral penetration, as opposed to the penetrative aspects of those activities...

 acts such as intercrural sex

Intercrural sex

Intercrural sex , also known as femoral/interfemoral sex/intercourse, is a type of non-penetrative sex, in which a male places his penis between his partner's thighs , and thrusts to create friction.-Heterosexuality:The sex education and sexual experimentation of adolescents may feature intercrural...

, frot

Frot

Frot is a slang term derived from frottage describing a form of non-penetrative male/male sex that usually but not always involves direct penis-to-penis contact....

tage and tribadism

Tribadism

Tribadism or tribbing, commonly known by its scissoring position, is a form of non-penetrative sex in which a woman rubs her vulva against her partner's body for sexual stimulation. This may involve female-to-female genital contact or a female rubbing her vulva against her partner's thigh, stomach,...

, although tribadism has been cited as a common, but rarely discussed, sexual practice among lesbians.

The term "vanilla" derives from the use of vanilla

Vanilla

Vanilla is a flavoring derived from orchids of the genus Vanilla, primarily from the Mexican species, Flat-leaved Vanilla . The word vanilla derives from the Spanish word "", little pod...

 extract as the basic flavoring for ice cream

Ice cream

Ice cream is a frozen dessert usually made from dairy products, such as milk and cream, and often combined with fruits or other ingredients and flavours. Most varieties contain sugar, although some are made with other sweeteners...

, and by extension, meaning "plain" or "conventional". In relationships where only one partner enjoys less conventional forms of sexual expression, the partner who does not enjoy such activities is often referred to as the vanilla partner. As such, it is easy for them to be branded unadventurous and dull in sexual matters. Through exploration with their partner, it is possible for a more vanilla-minded person to discover new facets of their sexuality. For others, such exploration is not a positive experience, and they may find the practices they are comfortable with are sufficient for their satisfaction.