(Singing) Come on babe, why don't we paint the town and all that jazz? I'm gonna rouge my knees and roll my stockings down, and all that jazz! Start the car, I know a whoopie spot, where the gin is cold and the piano's hot! It's just a noisy hall where there's a nightly brawl and all that jazz.

(Listening to a description of Roxie's trial on the radio) She stole my garters! First she steals my publicity, then she steals my lawyer, my trial date, snd now she steals my goddamn garter!

Look, honey, you want some advice? Well, here it is, direct from me to you. Keep your paws off my underwear! Okay?

(Singing) My sister and I had an act that couldn't flop. My sister and I were headed straight for the top. My sister and I made a thou a week at least, but my sister is now unfortunately deceased. I know it's sad, of course, but a fact is still a fact. And now all that remains is the remains of a perfect double act.

(Singing) No, I'm no one's wife, but oh, I love my life and all that jazz.

(Singing) She'd say, "What's your sister like?" I'd say, "Men."

You wanted my advice, right? Well here it is. Don't forget Billy Flynn's number one client is... Billy Flynn.

I just can't take it anymore! You can't go anywhere without hearing about that dumb tomato!!!!!!! (Mama sits up with her hair dyed like Roxie's) Oh, no, Mama, not you too.

What's your talent; washing and drying?