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Hand to God (Arrested Development episode)
Encyclopedia
"Hand To God" is the 34th episode aired of TV comedy series Arrested Development.
. Their conversation ends when Lucille calls Michael, hysterical, saying Buster has been hurt swimming in the ocean. Michael and George Michael meet Lucille and Oscar at the hospital. The "wordsmith" doctor tells the anxious family that Buster is going to be "all right" - by which he means that Buster has lost his left hand. We learn that the attack has affected Buster's memory, as he doesn't remember why he went in the ocean or that he discovered the truth about his real father. Buster and Michael talk about the baby, with Buster telling Michael to go to Maggie since he obviously still has feelings for her. During the conversation, Michael forces awkward laughter when Buster makes various "missing hand" jokes. When Michael tries his own hand joke, Buster screams at him to "Get the fuck out of my room!"
Michael decides for the sake of the baby he needs to win Maggie back, and finds her at the Miss Temples bar. They begin to talk when they are interrupted by two police officers who checked Maggie's house after the break-in and they tell her to call them if there's anything else. When Michael says that he wants to rekindle their relationship for more reasons than just the baby, Maggie finally confesses that Michael is not really the father: "I went to a sperm bank....The father is some guy from Harvard
." When Maggie asks him if he's really "that great of a guy" to raise someone else's baby, Michael replies yes but immediately regrets it, mouthing, "What is wrong with me?" The next day, Buster returns from the hospital, fitted with a metal hook prosthetic, to find the family gathered in Lucille's penthouse under a banner which reads "Welcome Home, Buster!" (the "You're killing me, Buster" banner strategically covered up). Buster says, "Let's give me a big hand!" and everyone forces awkward laughter. Gob arrives at the party ignorant of Buster's accident, and is scared by Buster's hook. When Buster says his hand was bitten off by a seal wearing a yellow bow-tie, Tobias attributes that statement to the "playful mutterings of the shock victim" because a seal would never attack a human. "Unless, of course, it had acquired a taste for mammal blood." Flashback
to Gob performing a magic show with a seal wearing a yellow bow-tie, when a cat jumps into the chest where the seal is hidden. Cut to another flashback in which Gob releases the seal into the ocean saying, "You're not going to be hand-fed anymore."
At the party, Lucille confesses to Michael that Buster's accident was her fault because she prayed for God to take anything to stop Buster from going to war. Gob also confesses to Michael that he released a seal into the ocean after giving it a taste for mammal blood. "You've got a better case than Mom does," Michael says. Still not convinced that Maggie is not lying, Michael asks Lindsay to break into Maggie's house to find evidence that someone else is the father, but Lindsay refuses. Instead, Michael recruits his son, sitting terrified as Buster sleeps on his lap, with his hook dangerously near George Michael's face.
Michael and George Michael go to Maggie's house to try to find some evidence of another man. Michael tries to send George Michael in alone, claiming he can't fit through the doggy door, but George Michael just grabs a note taped to the door and runs back to the stair car, telling Michael to flee the scene. As Michael is trying to convince George Michael to go inside the house, a policeman knocks on the windows of the stair car and asks what they're doing there. The officer tells them that he's making sure there's not another break in, adding that his partner is inside with his gun drawn. After the officer leaves Michael apologizes to a stunned George Michael. Michael looks at the note from the door, which has "Really eager to hear from you" written under a phone number. Michael thinks that might be something a guy who got dumped by his baby's mother might say.
Gob goes to the docks to rent a boat, carrying several animal crates containing terminally ill cats as a lure for the "seal who's got the taste for kitty's blood." Once on the open sea, Gob tries to toss cats in the water when he is interrupted by the cameraboat telling him to get the cats out of the scene - it turned out the skipper had already rented his boat to appear in the movie Maeby was filming, The Old Man and the Sea. Using Gene Parmesan to trace the phone number he had found on the door to an address, Michael drives to the house where he believes the real father of Maggie's baby lives. Trying to make up for putting George Michael in danger earlier, he tells his son to wait in the car because "this one could get a little ugly." Michael knocks on the door and the same policeman from Maggie's house opens the door. Michael is invited inside, where it emerges that that Maggie's baby belongs to the policeman and his gay partner David. They had given Maggie a "mixed cocktail, two parts Taylor and two parts Carter and let her do her thing" saying that they don't want to know who the biological father is (Officer Taylor is white, Officer Carter is black). Michael decides to help the cops get their baby from Maggie.
Michael thought he was one lie ahead of Maggie, but really he was one lie behind: Maggie's client - the overweight waitress - wasn't really fat; she was carrying the baby that Maggie had been hired to bear. The urine that Tobias and Lindsay had tested had come from the waitress, not Maggie, and the fat suit they had found had belonged to Maggie until she upgraded to a realistic latex model (which is what Michael saw). At the courthouse during the trial, the waitress's water breaks and Maggie pretends she has gone into labor too. Back at the film set, Gob confesses to Maeby that he's probably responsible for Buster's hand being bitten off. Maeby advises Gob that he should tell Buster the truth, adding that Buster will respect him for it. As soon as Gob leaves, Maeby smiles to herself and says, "Okay, now I'm just lying for no reason." Lucille prays again to God, asking Him to make Buster forget about his hand. At that exact moment Buster forgets about his claw and tries to give Oscar a massage. Buster gouges Oscar in the shoulder, then reacts with horror as he notices his hook as if for the first time. Screaming, "I'm a monster!" he goes on a rampage, trashing Lucille's apartment. At that moment, Gob walks in and confesses he is responsible for Buster's hand, and is subsequently attacked.
Michael and the policemen find Maggie's room at the hospital, but when Michael grabs the baby she's cuddling it turns out to be the fat suit wrapped in a blanket. Maggie confesses that she "outsourced" the pregnancy to her client to add verisimilitude to her fat case. The cops retrieve their baby from the waitress and go home. Afterwards, Michael and Maggie agree: no more lies or sex. However, they end up having sex in her hospital room, which results in Maggie actually becoming pregnant with what we can assume is Michael's baby. It is unknown what happens to the child, as it is never referenced again in the series.
Plot
Michael tells George Michael about Maggie Lizer's baby, whom Michael thinks is his. George Michael gets excited about being a big brother, but Michael lets him know that Maggie wants nothing to do with him after he accused her of faking the pregnancy at the end of the previous episodeOut on a Limb (Arrested Development episode)
"Out on a Limb" is the 33rd episode aired of TV comedy series Arrested Development.-Plot:Michael and Sally Sitwell are having Sunday brunch at Skip Church's Bistro when he spots George Michael and Maeby at the same restaurant, and Michael introduces Sally to them. Once Michael leaves, Ann arrives...
. Their conversation ends when Lucille calls Michael, hysterical, saying Buster has been hurt swimming in the ocean. Michael and George Michael meet Lucille and Oscar at the hospital. The "wordsmith" doctor tells the anxious family that Buster is going to be "all right" - by which he means that Buster has lost his left hand. We learn that the attack has affected Buster's memory, as he doesn't remember why he went in the ocean or that he discovered the truth about his real father. Buster and Michael talk about the baby, with Buster telling Michael to go to Maggie since he obviously still has feelings for her. During the conversation, Michael forces awkward laughter when Buster makes various "missing hand" jokes. When Michael tries his own hand joke, Buster screams at him to "Get the fuck out of my room!"
Michael decides for the sake of the baby he needs to win Maggie back, and finds her at the Miss Temples bar. They begin to talk when they are interrupted by two police officers who checked Maggie's house after the break-in and they tell her to call them if there's anything else. When Michael says that he wants to rekindle their relationship for more reasons than just the baby, Maggie finally confesses that Michael is not really the father: "I went to a sperm bank....The father is some guy from Harvard
Harvard University
Harvard University is a private Ivy League university located in Cambridge, Massachusetts, United States, established in 1636 by the Massachusetts legislature. Harvard is the oldest institution of higher learning in the United States and the first corporation chartered in the country...
." When Maggie asks him if he's really "that great of a guy" to raise someone else's baby, Michael replies yes but immediately regrets it, mouthing, "What is wrong with me?" The next day, Buster returns from the hospital, fitted with a metal hook prosthetic, to find the family gathered in Lucille's penthouse under a banner which reads "Welcome Home, Buster!" (the "You're killing me, Buster" banner strategically covered up). Buster says, "Let's give me a big hand!" and everyone forces awkward laughter. Gob arrives at the party ignorant of Buster's accident, and is scared by Buster's hook. When Buster says his hand was bitten off by a seal wearing a yellow bow-tie, Tobias attributes that statement to the "playful mutterings of the shock victim" because a seal would never attack a human. "Unless, of course, it had acquired a taste for mammal blood." Flashback
Flashback (narrative)
Flashback is an interjected scene that takes the narrative back in time from the current point the story has reached. Flashbacks are often used to recount events that happened before the story’s primary sequence of events or to fill in crucial backstory...
to Gob performing a magic show with a seal wearing a yellow bow-tie, when a cat jumps into the chest where the seal is hidden. Cut to another flashback in which Gob releases the seal into the ocean saying, "You're not going to be hand-fed anymore."
At the party, Lucille confesses to Michael that Buster's accident was her fault because she prayed for God to take anything to stop Buster from going to war. Gob also confesses to Michael that he released a seal into the ocean after giving it a taste for mammal blood. "You've got a better case than Mom does," Michael says. Still not convinced that Maggie is not lying, Michael asks Lindsay to break into Maggie's house to find evidence that someone else is the father, but Lindsay refuses. Instead, Michael recruits his son, sitting terrified as Buster sleeps on his lap, with his hook dangerously near George Michael's face.
Michael and George Michael go to Maggie's house to try to find some evidence of another man. Michael tries to send George Michael in alone, claiming he can't fit through the doggy door, but George Michael just grabs a note taped to the door and runs back to the stair car, telling Michael to flee the scene. As Michael is trying to convince George Michael to go inside the house, a policeman knocks on the windows of the stair car and asks what they're doing there. The officer tells them that he's making sure there's not another break in, adding that his partner is inside with his gun drawn. After the officer leaves Michael apologizes to a stunned George Michael. Michael looks at the note from the door, which has "Really eager to hear from you" written under a phone number. Michael thinks that might be something a guy who got dumped by his baby's mother might say.
Gob goes to the docks to rent a boat, carrying several animal crates containing terminally ill cats as a lure for the "seal who's got the taste for kitty's blood." Once on the open sea, Gob tries to toss cats in the water when he is interrupted by the cameraboat telling him to get the cats out of the scene - it turned out the skipper had already rented his boat to appear in the movie Maeby was filming, The Old Man and the Sea. Using Gene Parmesan to trace the phone number he had found on the door to an address, Michael drives to the house where he believes the real father of Maggie's baby lives. Trying to make up for putting George Michael in danger earlier, he tells his son to wait in the car because "this one could get a little ugly." Michael knocks on the door and the same policeman from Maggie's house opens the door. Michael is invited inside, where it emerges that that Maggie's baby belongs to the policeman and his gay partner David. They had given Maggie a "mixed cocktail, two parts Taylor and two parts Carter and let her do her thing" saying that they don't want to know who the biological father is (Officer Taylor is white, Officer Carter is black). Michael decides to help the cops get their baby from Maggie.
Michael thought he was one lie ahead of Maggie, but really he was one lie behind: Maggie's client - the overweight waitress - wasn't really fat; she was carrying the baby that Maggie had been hired to bear. The urine that Tobias and Lindsay had tested had come from the waitress, not Maggie, and the fat suit they had found had belonged to Maggie until she upgraded to a realistic latex model (which is what Michael saw). At the courthouse during the trial, the waitress's water breaks and Maggie pretends she has gone into labor too. Back at the film set, Gob confesses to Maeby that he's probably responsible for Buster's hand being bitten off. Maeby advises Gob that he should tell Buster the truth, adding that Buster will respect him for it. As soon as Gob leaves, Maeby smiles to herself and says, "Okay, now I'm just lying for no reason." Lucille prays again to God, asking Him to make Buster forget about his hand. At that exact moment Buster forgets about his claw and tries to give Oscar a massage. Buster gouges Oscar in the shoulder, then reacts with horror as he notices his hook as if for the first time. Screaming, "I'm a monster!" he goes on a rampage, trashing Lucille's apartment. At that moment, Gob walks in and confesses he is responsible for Buster's hand, and is subsequently attacked.
Michael and the policemen find Maggie's room at the hospital, but when Michael grabs the baby she's cuddling it turns out to be the fat suit wrapped in a blanket. Maggie confesses that she "outsourced" the pregnancy to her client to add verisimilitude to her fat case. The cops retrieve their baby from the waitress and go home. Afterwards, Michael and Maggie agree: no more lies or sex. However, they end up having sex in her hospital room, which results in Maggie actually becoming pregnant with what we can assume is Michael's baby. It is unknown what happens to the child, as it is never referenced again in the series.
Cultural references
- George Michael says that Ann is out protesting Nip/TuckNip/TuckNip/Tuck is an American drama series created by Ryan Murphy, which aired on FX in the United States. The series focuses on McNamara/Troy, a plastic surgery practice, and follows its founders, Sean McNamara and Christian Troy...
. - Maggie tells Michael that the father of the baby is "some guy from Harvard", to which Michael replies, "He's probably some geek SimpsonsThe SimpsonsThe Simpsons is an American animated sitcom created by Matt Groening for the Fox Broadcasting Company. The series is a satirical parody of a middle class American lifestyle epitomized by its family of the same name, which consists of Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa and Maggie...
writer's kid." This is a reference to the fact that many of the people who have written for the Simpsons, such as Conan O'BrienConan O'BrienConan Christopher O'Brien is an American television host, comedian, writer, producer and performer. Since November 2010 he has hosted Conan, a late-night talk show that airs on the American cable television station TBS....
, are Harvard graduates. - When Lindsay announces that Maeby has gone to "Sacremende" with the debate team, we are shown a GoogleGoogleGoogle Inc. is an American multinational public corporation invested in Internet search, cloud computing, and advertising technologies. Google hosts and develops a number of Internet-based services and products, and generates profit primarily from advertising through its AdWords program...
search for the word "Sacremende", which finds no results, and includes Google's suggestion, "Did you mean SacramentoSacramentoSacramento is the capital of the state of California, in the United States of America.Sacramento may also refer to:- United States :*Sacramento County, California*Sacramento, Kentucky*Sacramento – San Joaquin River Delta...
?" - The Best Years of Our LivesThe Best Years of Our LivesThe Best Years of Our Lives is a 1946 American drama film directed by William Wyler, and starring Fredric March, Myrna Loy, Dana Andrews, Teresa Wright, and Harold Russell, a United States paratrooper who lost both hands in a military training accident. The film is about three United States...
Buster's use of the statement "I'm a monster!" is a reference to the film, in which Homer Parish (played by Harold RussellHarold RussellHarold John Russell was a Canadian-American World War II veteran who became one of only two non-professional actors to win an Academy Award for acting...
) utters the same line while dealing with the stresses associated with a prosthetic limb. - We see filming for Maeby's project, a remake of The Old Man and the SeaThe Old Man and the SeaThe Old Man and the Sea is a novel written by American author Ernest Hemingway in 1951 in Cuba, and published in 1952. It was the last major work of fiction to be produced by Hemingway and published in his lifetime. One of his most famous works, it centers upon Santiago, an aging fisherman who...
called The Young Man and the Beach. - PeanutsPeanutsPeanuts is a syndicated daily and Sunday American comic strip written and illustrated by Charles M. Schulz, which ran from October 2, 1950, to February 13, 2000, continuing in reruns afterward...
characters as male genitals: in the hospital, Buster encourages Michael to talk to Maggie and confronts Michael about his shyness with women: "a seal didn’t bite your Linus off, did it?" - When Buster is in the hospital, Lucille screams "Give my son the juice!", a reference to Shirley McLaine's famous line "Give my daughter the shot!" in Terms of EndearmentTerms of EndearmentTerms of Endearment is a 1983 romantic comedy-drama film adapted by James L. Brooks from the novel by Larry McMurtry and starring Shirley MacLaine, Debra Winger, and Jack Nicholson...
.
Character cameos
- Chuck Martin, one of the writers for this show, can be seen at the far right in the scene where Maeby directs The Old Man and the Sea.
- Michael speaks to Gene Parmesan, the Bluth family's private detective, on the phone to garner information about the owner of the phone number left on Maggie's front door, which was acquired by George Michael, though Parmesan is not seen in this episode.
- Officer Taylor and Officer Carter are playing the Hot Cops song when Michael comes inside.
Callbacks
- When Buster is in the hospital, he can't remember the fight he had with Lucille or his revelation that Oscar is his father. This is a callback to when Micheal couldn't remember the events preceding his car accident My Mother the CarMy Mother the CarMy Mother the Car is an American fantasy sitcom which aired for a single season on NBC between September 14, 1965 and September 6, 1966. A total of thirty episodes were produced by United Artists Television....
. - While on the stakeout, Michael refers to himself and George-Michael as McGibbon and Bullet, a reference to Red McGibbon and Bullet: Nazi Hunters - the series starring Uncle Jack (Martin ShortMartin ShortMartin Hayter Short, CM is a Canadian actor, comedian, writer, singer and producer. He is best-known for his comedy work, particularly on the TV programs SCTV and Saturday Night Live...
) - as shown in Ready, Aim, Marry MeReady, Aim, Marry Me"Ready, Aim, Marry Me" is the thirty-second episode aired of TV comedy series Arrested Development.-Plot:Michael Bluth arrives home to find his mother Lucille in a state of agitation. She's concerned that Lucille Austero is making a power play by buying up shares of Bluth Co...
.
Foreshadowing
- Officer Taylor (Jay JohnstonJay JohnstonJay Johnston is an American actor and comedian best known for his work as a writer and cast member on the HBO sketch comedy series Mr...
) says that his partner, Officer Carter (Jerry MinorJerry MinorJerry C. Minor is an American actor, comedian and writer known for his comedic roles in numerous television programs such as Mr. Show, Saturday Night Live, Delocated, Crossballs, Carpoolers and Lucky Louie....
), is in the house. In addition to being his partner on the police force, he is his life partner, as we later discover. Although they both are childless in this episode, they say they have daughters in episode 21 "Not Without My Daughter" of Season 1. The daughters are never seen, but are said to have run off.