Ready, Aim, Marry Me
Encyclopedia
"Ready, Aim, Marry Me" is the thirty-second episode aired of TV comedy series Arrested Development.

Plot

Michael Bluth arrives home to find his mother Lucille in a state of agitation. She's concerned that Lucille Austero is making a power play by buying up shares of Bluth Co. Michael asks his son George Michael if he wants to share the date basket that he received for bidding on Sally Sitwell at the charity auction. Because he tried to deliver the basket to Sitwell industries and was told that Sally wasn't in—even though he saw the back of somebody's blonde head in the conference room—he has decided to cancel their date. However, it was actually Stan trying on a new wig.

Tobias received the same package but, wanting to make sure everything would be to Lindsay's liking, inadvertently used up his free body chocolate and hotel stays himself. Michael gives Tobias his basket. At the office, G.O.B. tells Michael that he thinks Lucille 2 is making a move with her shares because somebody hung up when he answered her phone. The caller ID indicated that it was Stan Sitwell, who was also interested in Lucille 2. Michael begins to think that Sitwell and Lucille 2 are working on a business deal. Michael asks Lindsay to go over to Sitwell's company and investigate.

In the attic of the model home, George Sr. has become wedged underneath the furnace while chasing a sourball that had rolled out of his pocket. Eventually, Michael rescues him and mentions his fears of Lucille 2. George Sr. realizes that the company needs money and suggests bringing in "Uncle Jack" Dorso. Dorso, a friend of George Sr.'s father, first achieved success in the 1940s while appearing in the radio and film serial Red McGibbon and Bullet: Nazi Hunters. The actor who played Red McGibbon was eventually arrested for his Communist sympathies, and Jack made one failed attempt at going solo as Bullet. After that, he opened a series of gyms, an idea that he stole from Red during a prison visit. Jack annually performed feats of strength on his birthday, but lost the use of his legs on his 70th birthday when he tried to squat 350 pounds. George Sr. warns Michael that Jack always wants something in return for a favor, and tells him to ask Lucille if she'd be willing to "take another bullet for the family".

The family gathers at Lucille's to solicit Uncle Jack, who arrives in the arms of his muscular assistant, Dragon. Michael makes his request to Jack, who makes it clear that if Michael sets Jack up with Lindsay, he will bail out the company. Michael, knowing that Lindsay is attracted to Dragon, sets up a romantic weekend for Jack and Lindsay, who thinks the romantic weekend is with Dragon.

Buster, meanwhile, has decided to pursue Lucille 2 once more, and he and G.O.B. spy on Lucille and Sitwell. When Maeby tells Michael that Tobias has left with his romantic gift basket, he heads for the hotel to cut off Tobias. Seeing Jack, Dragon and Lindsay arriving, Michael takes off on the romantic horseride with Tobias. Michael, Tobias, Lindsay, Jack, Dragon, Buster, G.O.B., Lucille 2, and Stan Sitwell are now all enjoying—to varying degrees—the getaway package at the hotel.

In the massage tent, Michael is trying to tell Tobias that Lindsay won't be showing up when G.O.B. and Buster pounce in, announcing that they saw Lindsay with Jack and Dragon. The group then jumps in on Lucille 2 and Sitwell. Realizing that Lucille and Stan are entangled romantically (and not fiscally), Michael tries to stop the plan. Buster, upset that G.O.B. was actually sleeping with Lucille 2 (and not spying on her for the company as he claimed), attacks G.O.B. Lucille 2, upset at the family's tricks, decides that she will now sell her shares. Tobias, having discovered Lindsay with Jack and Dragon, fights Jack for Lindsey's love. Tobias loses when Dragon hurls Jack at Tobias, sending both of them to the floor. This act of bravery rekindles Lindsay's interest in Tobias, and Lindsey asks Dragon to pick up Tobias and take him home. Michael carries Jack home, for which Jack agrees to buy the controlling shares of Bluth Company.

Cultural references

  • Bill O'Reilly
    Bill O'Reilly (commentator)
    William James "Bill" O'Reilly, Jr. is an American television host, author, syndicated columnist and political commentator. He is the host of the political commentary program The O'Reilly Factor on the Fox News Channel, which is the most watched cable news television program on American television...

    - Michael mentions the FOX news anchor, saying that the Bluth Company is a regular feature on Bill O'Reilly's "Most Ridiculous Item of the Day".
  • Edgar Winter
    Edgar Winter
    Edgar Holland Winter is an American musician. He is famous for being a multi-instrumentalist. He is a highly skilled keyboardist, saxophonist and percussionist. He often plays an instrument while singing. He was most successful in the 1970s with his band, The Edgar Winter Group, notably with their...

    - Stan Sitwell says that he looks like Edgar Winter in his long blonde wig.
  • Jack LaLanne
    Jack LaLanne
    Francois Henri "Jack" LaLanne was an American fitness, exercise, and nutritional expert and motivational speaker who is sometimes called "the godfather of fitness" and the "first fitness superhero." He described himself as being a "sugarholic" and a "junk food junkie" until he was 15...

    - Uncle Jack resembles the internationally known body builder, who (like Uncle Jack) was 90 years old at the time the episode was filmed.

Cameos

  • This is Martin Short
    Martin Short
    Martin Hayter Short, CM is a Canadian actor, comedian, writer, singer and producer. He is best-known for his comedy work, particularly on the TV programs SCTV and Saturday Night Live...

    's first and only appearance as Uncle Jack, although the character is mentioned again in "Hand to God
    Hand to God (Arrested Development episode)
    "Hand To God" is the 34th episode aired of TV comedy series Arrested Development.- Plot :Michael tells George Michael about Maggie Lizer's baby, whom Michael thinks is his. George Michael gets excited about being a big brother, but Michael lets him know that Maggie wants nothing to do with him...

    " and "Making a Stand
    Making a Stand
    "Making a Stand" is the forty-eighth episode aired of the TV comedy series Arrested Development.-Synopsis:At a meeting at the Bluth Company, Michael tries to follow his father's wish that Gob be included in the business...

    ".
  • This episode marks the final season 2 appearance of Stan Sitwell and Lucille 2. Sitwell returns in Season 3's finale, "Development Arrested
    Development Arrested
    "Development Arrested" is the 53rd episode aired of the TV comedy series Arrested Development. It is the season finale for Season 3, as well as the series finale before the announcement of Season 4 over five years later.-Episode:...

    ".
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