One-liner joke
Encyclopedia
A one-liner is a joke
Joke
A joke is a phrase or a paragraph with a humorous twist. It can be in many different forms, such as a question or short story. To achieve this end, jokes may employ irony, sarcasm, word play and other devices...

 that is delivered in a single line. A good one-liner is said to be pithy.

Comedians and actors use this comedic method as part of their act, e.g. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield , was an American comedian, and actor, known for the catchphrases "I don't get no respect!," "No respect, no respect at all... that's the story of my life" or "I get no respect, I tell ya" and his monologues on that theme...

, Bruce Campbell
Bruce Campbell
Bruce Lorne Campbell is an American film and television actor. As a cult movie actor, Campbell starred as Ashley J. "Ash" Williams in Sam Raimi's Evil Dead series of films and he has starred in many low-budget cult films such as Crimewave, Maniac Cop, Bubba Ho-tep, Escape From L.A. and Sundown:...

, Steven Wright
Steven Wright
Steven Alexander Wright is an American comedian, actor and writer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical and sometimes nonsensical jokes and one-liners with contrived situations.-Early life and career:Wright was born in Mount Auburn...

, Emo Philips
Emo Philips
Emo Philips is an American entertainer and comedian born in the Chicago suburb of Downers Grove. Much of his standup comedy stems from the use of paraprosdokians and garden path sentences spoken in a wandering falsetto tone of voice and a confused, childlike delivery of his material to produce the...

, Tommy Cooper
Tommy Cooper
Thomas Frederick "Tommy" Cooper was a very popular British prop comedian and magician from Caerphilly, Wales.Cooper was a member of The Magic Circle, and respected by traditional magicians...

, Mark Linn-Baker
Mark Linn-Baker
Mark Linn-Baker is an American actor and director famous for his role as Larry Appleton on the television sitcom Perfect Strangers.-Early life and career:...

, Henny Youngman
Henny Youngman
Henry "Henny" Youngman was a British-born American comedian and violinist famous for "one-liners", short, simple jokes usually delivered rapid-fire...

, Mitch Hedberg
Mitch Hedberg
Mitchell Lee "Mitch" Hedberg was an American stand-up comedian known for his surreal humor and unconventional comedic delivery. His comedy typically featured short, sometimes one-line jokes, mixed with absurd elements and non sequiturs...

, Dan Mintz
Dan Mintz
Dan Mintz is an American comedian, writer, and actor. He is known for his extremely deadpan delivery, keeping his eyes fixed straight ahead and never looking toward the camera or audience...

, Zach Galifianakis
Zach Galifianakis
Zachary Knight "Zach" Galifianakis is an American stand-up comedian and actor known for his numerous film and television appearances including his own Comedy Central Presents special...

, Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin is an American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer and humorist. Martin is best known for his work as a stand-up comedian, contributor on The Daily Show and for his Comedy Central show Important Things with Demetri Martin.- Early life :Demetri Martin was born to a Greek...

, Jimmy Carr
Jimmy Carr
James Anthony Patrick "Jimmy" Carr is an English-Irish comedian and humourist. He is known for his deadpan delivery and dark humour. He is also a writer, actor and presenter of radio and television....

, Anthony Jeselnik
Anthony Jeselnik
Anthony Jeselnik is an American stand-up comedian and television writer.-Personal life:Jeselnik was born and raised in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. He earned a bachelors degree in English Literature from Tulane University, then moved to Los Angeles...

, Tim Vine
Tim Vine
Timothy "Tim" Mark Vine is an English actor, writer and comedian. He has released a number of DVDs of his stand-up comedy, as well as starring in the successful series Not Going Out with Lee Mack on the BBC...

, Milton Jones
Milton Jones
Milton Jones is an English comedian. His style of humour is based on one-liners involving puns delivered in a deadpan and slightly neurotic style. Jones has had various shows on BBC Radio 4 and is a recurring guest panellist on Mock the Week...

, Shmuel Breban
Shmuel Breban
Shmuel Breban is a Jewish-American stand-up comedian known for his sharp and unconventional style, blending logic and absurdity, often through misdirection...

, Stewart Francis
Stewart Francis
Stewart Francis is a Canadian stand-up comedian, actor and writer. In addition to his work in Canada and the USA, he frequently tours in the UK and appears on British television...

 etc.

Examples

  • "Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks." (Anonymous)
  • "A baby seal walks into a club." (Anonymous)
  • "A dyslexic man walks into a bra." (Anonymous)
  • "I heard on the radio the other day that Labour
    Labour Party (UK)
    The Labour Party is a centre-left democratic socialist party in the United Kingdom. It surpassed the Liberal Party in general elections during the early 1920s, forming minority governments under Ramsay MacDonald in 1924 and 1929-1931. The party was in a wartime coalition from 1940 to 1945, after...

     is suffering from 'internal squabbles'; I know what happened -- they all turned up to work in the same colour tie" (Violet Bedwell-Clayton)
  • "My friend told me the other day 'I wont be able to get to sleep tonight.' I replied with one word 'Chloroform
    Chloroform
    Chloroform is an organic compound with formula CHCl3. It is one of the four chloromethanes. The colorless, sweet-smelling, dense liquid is a trihalomethane, and is considered somewhat hazardous...

    '" (Violet Bedwell-Clayton)
  • "Here was the sort of man you only dared to cross if you had a team of Sherpas with you." (Douglas Adams
    Douglas Adams
    Douglas Noel Adams was an English writer and dramatist. He is best known as the author of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, which started life in 1978 as a BBC radio comedy before developing into a "trilogy" of five books that sold over 15 million copies in his lifetime, a television...

    )
  • "I don't smoke, I don't drink, I don't snort, and I don't gamble. I do lie a little bit though." (Tim Maia
    Tim Maia
    Tim Maia , born Sebastião Rodrigues Maia in Rio de Janeiro, was a famous Brazilian musician known for his iconoclastic, ironic, outspoken, and polemical musical style...

    )
  • "I'm not an actor, but I play one on TV." (David Recksiek)
  • "Black Beauty. He was a dark horse." (Tim Vine
    Tim Vine
    Timothy "Tim" Mark Vine is an English actor, writer and comedian. He has released a number of DVDs of his stand-up comedy, as well as starring in the successful series Not Going Out with Lee Mack on the BBC...

    )
  • "Bigfoot is blurry, it's not the photographer's fault." (Mitch Hedberg
    Mitch Hedberg
    Mitchell Lee "Mitch" Hedberg was an American stand-up comedian known for his surreal humor and unconventional comedic delivery. His comedy typically featured short, sometimes one-line jokes, mixed with absurd elements and non sequiturs...

    )
  • "I have nothing to declare except my genius." (Oscar Wilde
    Oscar Wilde
    Oscar Fingal O'Flahertie Wills Wilde was an Irish writer and poet. After writing in different forms throughout the 1880s, he became one of London's most popular playwrights in the early 1890s...

    , upon arriving at US customs 1882)
  • "Race is just a pigment of the imagination" (Glen Highland)
  • "If all those sweet young things were laid end to end – I wouldn't be a bit surprised." (Dorothy Parker
    Dorothy Parker
    Dorothy Parker was an American poet, short story writer, critic and satirist, best known for her wit, wisecracks, and eye for 20th century urban foibles....

    , on girls attending a Yale prom)
  • "So, have you noticed there aren't a lot of Chinese guys named Rusty?" (George Carlin
    George Carlin
    George Denis Patrick Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, social critic, actor and author, who won five Grammy Awards for his comedy albums....

    )
  • "I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception." (Groucho Marx
    Groucho Marx
    Julius Henry "Groucho" Marx was an American comedian and film star famed as a master of wit. His rapid-fire delivery of innuendo-laden patter earned him many admirers. He made 13 feature films with his siblings the Marx Brothers, of whom he was the third-born...

    )
  • "Take my wife – please!" (Henny Youngman
    Henny Youngman
    Henry "Henny" Youngman was a British-born American comedian and violinist famous for "one-liners", short, simple jokes usually delivered rapid-fire...

    )
  • "The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades" (Demetri Martin
    Demetri Martin
    Demetri Martin is an American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer and humorist. Martin is best known for his work as a stand-up comedian, contributor on The Daily Show and for his Comedy Central show Important Things with Demetri Martin.- Early life :Demetri Martin was born to a Greek...

    )
  • "My friend has difficulty sleeping, but I can do it with my eyes closed." (Shmuel Breban
    Shmuel Breban
    Shmuel Breban is a Jewish-American stand-up comedian known for his sharp and unconventional style, blending logic and absurdity, often through misdirection...

    )
  • "A couple of days ago I was in a boat travelling from island to island. Now I'm back home, the closest thing we have to an island is a roundabout" (Violet Bedwell-Clayton)
  • "If it wasn't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all." (Rodney Dangerfield
    Rodney Dangerfield
    Rodney Dangerfield , was an American comedian, and actor, known for the catchphrases "I don't get no respect!," "No respect, no respect at all... that's the story of my life" or "I get no respect, I tell ya" and his monologues on that theme...

    )
  • "Overall, I'd say my career as a photographer has been a bit of a blur." (Milton Jones
    Milton Jones
    Milton Jones is an English comedian. His style of humour is based on one-liners involving puns delivered in a deadpan and slightly neurotic style. Jones has had various shows on BBC Radio 4 and is a recurring guest panellist on Mock the Week...

    )
  • "My mom bought me a memory pillow a couple of years ago... I don't tell secrets in my bedroom anymore." (Bink
    Bink
    Bink may refer to:* Bink Video, a video format popular in many video games* Bink , a character of the Xanth series by Piers Anthony* Bink , a hip-hop producer...

    )
  • "Ah, nostalgia ain't what it used to be..." (English
    English people
    The English are a nation and ethnic group native to England, who speak English. The English identity is of early mediaeval origin, when they were known in Old English as the Anglecynn. England is now a country of the United Kingdom, and the majority of English people in England are British Citizens...

     Proverb
    Proverb
    A proverb is a simple and concrete saying popularly known and repeated, which expresses a truth, based on common sense or the practical experience of humanity. They are often metaphorical. A proverb that describes a basic rule of conduct may also be known as a maxim...

    )
  • "I have a map of the world... it's actual size." (Steven Wright
    Steven Wright
    Steven Alexander Wright is an American comedian, actor and writer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical and sometimes nonsensical jokes and one-liners with contrived situations.-Early life and career:Wright was born in Mount Auburn...

    )
  • "I live in a two-income household, but who knows how long my mom can keep that up." (Shmuel Breban
    Shmuel Breban
    Shmuel Breban is a Jewish-American stand-up comedian known for his sharp and unconventional style, blending logic and absurdity, often through misdirection...

    )
  • "I quit my job at the helium factory, I refuse to be spoken to in that tone." (Stewart Francis
    Stewart Francis
    Stewart Francis is a Canadian stand-up comedian, actor and writer. In addition to his work in Canada and the USA, he frequently tours in the UK and appears on British television...

    )
  • "I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass, and I'm all out of bubblegum." (Nada in They Live
    They Live
    They Live is a 1988 science fiction/horror film directed by John Carpenter, who also wrote the screenplay under the pseudonym Frank Armitage ....

    )
  • "People laughed when I said I'd become a comedian. Well, they're not laughing now." (Bob Monkhouse
    Bob Monkhouse
    Robert Alan "Bob" Monkhouse, OBE was an English entertainer. He was a successful comedy writer, comedian and actor and was also well known on British television as a presenter and game show host...

    )
  • "Venison's dear, isn't it?" (Jimmy Carr
    Jimmy Carr
    James Anthony Patrick "Jimmy" Carr is an English-Irish comedian and humourist. He is known for his deadpan delivery and dark humour. He is also a writer, actor and presenter of radio and television....

    )
  • "Get me a crocodile sandwich, and make it snappy" (Anonymous)
  • "You've heard the saying that every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings. But what they don't tell you is that every time a mousetrap snaps, an angel gets set on fire." (Jack Handey
    Jack Handey
    Jack Handey is an American humorist. He is best known for his Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey, a large body of surrealistic one-liner jokes, as well as his "Fuzzy Memories" and "My Big Thick Novel" shorts. Although many people assume otherwise, Handey is a real person, not a pen name or ...

    )
The source of this article is wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.  The text of this article is licensed under the GFDL.
 
x
OK